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BETSEY JANE 


ON THE 

NEW WOMAN 


BY 



HERBERT E. BROWN 

AUTHOR OF “BETSEY JANE ON WHEELS” 



CHICAGO 

CHARLES H, KERR & COMPANY 
1897 


PZ3 
. B 5 


Copyright, 1897 
By Herbert E. Brown 
A// rights reserved 








Monthly, $3.0(> per year. March, 1897. 

Entered at the Postoftice, Chicago, as second-class matter. 






« 


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. / 


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/ 

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Dedicated to 


^^THE HENPECKED HUSBANDSP 

\ 



i 



BETSEY JANE 

ON THE 

NEW WOMAN. 

CHAPTER I. 

HOW IT HAPPENED. 

He dropped his knife and fork and brought his two 
bony fists down on the breakfast table with such force 
that every dish fairly jumped and danced and nearly 
frightened me out of my wits. “I tell you, Betsey, I 
can not and will not endure it another day. I am be- 
ing driven to destruction and distraction, and will be 
compelled to either commit murder or suicide if things 
continue in this way much longer.” It was the voice 
of Benjamin, my husband, running mad and no efforts 
of restraint from its owner. 

“Benjamin Jones,” said I, “whatever can be the 
trouble with you now ? Remember that you are the 
head of a family and a deacon in the Baptist Church, 
and don’t disgrace yourself and everybody associated 
with you by talking and acting like a lunatic. But 
do tell, what has happened to rile you up in this un- 
usual manner? Have the calves gotten out again?” 

“Calves out, no. I keep my stuff where it belongs; 
don’t let my stock run about and trample over every- 
body in the country.” 


7 


8 


iUCTSKV JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


“But you usually become excited when your calves 
or pigs cause you any unusual trouble, and I only 
ventured the suggestion. If it is anything serious that 
disturbs you I would like to know it at once, so please 
explain,’- I said. 

“Well,'’ said Benjamin, leaning back in his chair 
and pointing out of the back window of the dining 
room with his left-hand thumb, “when I went out to 
the barn this morning I met the hired man riding out 
of the side door mounted on Billy ; and he only pointed 
toward the corn field, gave the old horse a slash vvith 
the cattle whip and galloped away in answer to my 
question as to ‘what in thunder is the matter. Josiahr’ 
I looked as he directed and what do you think I saw ? 
Blame my buttons, I wish we lived a thousand miles 
from nobody. Every hoof of Fritz Weimar’s cattle, 
big and little, were scattered over my fields and amus- 
ing themselves by hooking and tearing my corn shocks 
to pieces. I seized a pitchfork and ran to help Josiah 
drive the brutes out, but to save my life I couldn’t 
get near enough to one of the blasted critters to prick 
his hide ; but mind you, Betsey, I will settle this mat- 
ter with that infernal Fritz within half an hour. He 
shall pay me all the damages I demand of him, or I 
will make him wish he had never left the shores of 
his Fodderland. I will do it, Betsey. I am in the 
humor to do something desperate and I shall act at 
once, before you have a chance to persuade me to let 
the matter drop, as you always have. Bum the whole 
outlit of them dum Dutchmen. I have been run over 
and trampled upon'and eat up just as long as I am go- 


HOW IT HAPPENED 


9 


ing to. I was here first and I shall be here last if I 
have to exterminate the whole outfit. Blamed if I 
don’t imagine right now that I am old Samson with 
the jawbone of an — a mule in my good right hand 
and slaying the Phil — or Dutch by the thousands.” 

‘•Benjamin, there is nothing gained by acting from 
the promptings of an evil spirit. Eat your breakfast, 
wash and dress yourself decently, and if by that time 
you have regained what little sense you have, go to 
town and lay your case before a lawyer. Tell him 
all about your trouble with your neighbors and act 
only from a wise and conservative standpoint. If 
you will only calm your passions and take my advice 
once more, you will come out all right ; right will al- 
ways triumph over wrong if we will but give it a 
chance.” 

He did as I had admonished him, which somewhat 
surprised me, as he was fearful mad, and was back 
from town in an hour and informed me that the law- 
yer had taken his case, and a suit against Fritz Wei- 
mer had already been begun. He had sued him for 
a thousand dollars damages, and damage suits would 
also be brought against Tim Grunberg, Hans Ober- 
hessen and Max Heidenfeld that very day. 

These four Germans were our nearest neighbors ; 
their farms joined us on all sides. The time was once 
when we had good neighbors, but since the Germans 
had come into the neighborhood and bought up almost 
every farm within a radius of twenty miles of us, we 
had had no peace. These vulgar foreigners, who 
completely surrounded us, were exceedingly anxious 


10 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

to buy our farm, but we did not care to sell, and they 
seemed to do everything mean they could think of 
just to bother us, and in this way try and force us to 
sell to them. 

The day set for the trials arrived and Benjamin 
went to town, taking our hired man, Josiah Evans, 
along as a witness. Just as the old clock was strik- 
ing the noon hour Benjamin and his man drove into 
the yard and called to me to prepare dinner at once. 
As I looked into my partner’s face I saw there a look 
of serene contentment. He looked happier than I had 
seen him for a month, and I fancied that things had 
gone his way. I knew from actual experience that 
it could not be otherwise, with such a triumphant and 
contented countenance. 

After dinner he informed me that he had agreed 
upon a plan of settlement of the whole matter, one 
which would place him forever beyond the reach and 
out of harm’s way, so far as his German neighbors 
were concerned. But before the deal could be con- 
summated I would have to give my consent. I told 
him to state the terms, and it would not take me long 
to make up my mind. I had already formed my pri- 
vate opinion as to about what damages we ought to 
have from our lawless neighbors, but I was surprised 
when he told me that the deal included the sale of our 
farm and all the stock, farming implements, grain on 
hand and whatever household goods we wished to dis- 
pose of. I shrank from the idea of parting with our 
dear old home and all the blessed surroundings. To 
be sure, our immediate surroundings were not desir- 


HOW If HAPPENED 


11 


able, but we had many near and dear neighbors whom 
I thought it would break my heart to leave ; the 
church and all of its hallowed recollections, how dear 
it was to me ! But I thought the matter all over very 
carefully, and as the price which the Germans offered 
was more than the property was really worth, I gave 
my consent. I knew that with the arhount of money 
we would have after everything had been sold and our 
several loans collected in, we would have the means 
with which to buy a place to our liking. 

In less than a month our business matters were all 
settled up, and we were prepared to bid farewell to 
Griggsville and the prairies of Illinois and go forth 
into the wide world to select another home. All we 
had left, save a handsome bank account, was our 
clothing, which we had packed into several large 
trunks, and my bedding and precious bric-a-brac, all 
carefully packed into a couple of large boxes and 
stored in town ready to be shipped to us upon our 
order. 

It was the first day of November, a day that I shall 
never forget. We had attended the last service we 
would probably ever observe in our old church, had 
taken the last sad leave and hand-shake of our old and 
true friends and neighbors, the conductor had given 
the signal, and we were speeding toward the east as 
fast as steam would carry us. It was a hazy day, 
neither too warm nor too cold ; a gentle breeze stirred 
the drying leaves and corn blades as we rode past the 
well-cultivated farms that had been transformed from 
a wild prairie under our notice. I remarked that it 


12 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


was Indian summer, but Benjamin only nodded his 
head ; he had a big lump in his throat and could not 
speak, “Yes, Benjamin, it is Indian summer,’- I 
continued, “the season when we have been able to 
estimate the extent of our profits for a quarter of a 
century. ‘When the hazy days of November come 
we will know how our crops will yield and see the 
fruits of our year’s labors,’ is what you used to say, 
Benjamin, to me and the children.” Benjamin again 
nodded his head, and as he looked at me I saw several 
big tears chasing each other down his cheeks. 

“Tickets !” said the conductor. Benjamin was a 
little excited, and after ransacking all his pockets, 
finally produced the necessary credentials which se- 
cured us a continuous passage to Rutland, the nearest 
railroad town to our old Vermont home. We had 
decided to first visit the old farm and scenes of our 
childhood. 

We passed through Chicago and had no trouble in 
changing cars, and in due time arrived at our desti- 
nation. But how changed everything seemed to be ! 
The folks we used to know were either nearly all dead 
or moved away, and what, when we were young, 
seemed but small hills now looked like mountains to 
us. The land that Benjamin worked without a mur- 
mur when he was a boy he said he would not take as 
a gift. To say that we were disappointed would be 
putting it mild. The old crooked and rock-walled 
roads and small irregular fields, covered with stones, 
had lost their charms for both of us, and it did not 
take us long to decide that we didn’t want' to re-es- 
tablish our home in that state. 


now IT HAPPENED 


13 


We had been there but a few clays when Benjamin 
met Cyrus Woods, a man about his age, who was 
raised only a few miles from his old home, and with 
whom we were both very well acc^uainted when 
young. Mr. Woods left Vermont soon after we did, 
and located in Massachusetts. Business had called 
him back to his old home, but he was now ready to 
return to his present home at Greenfield, Mass., and 
he invited us to accompany him. He gave such a 
flattering account of the country around his Massa- 
chusetts home that we concluded to go and look at it, 
and accordingly accepted his invitation. As we had 
called on all the old friends whom we cared to 
see, we all took the first train south the next morning, 
and I had the pleasure of meeting Mrs. Woods, who 
was Amanda Martin, and also an old Vermont girl 
from near our old home at Rutland, before the day 
was passed, and we ate our supper with a relish and 
talked over old times with an equal appreciation. 

We remained with our friends several weeks, dur- 
ing which time we looked the country over thoroughly 
and concluded that it exactly suited our taste. Ben- 
jamin said that nothing else would ever satisfy him 
but a nice farm near Greenfield where he could pur- 
sue his old avocation. He felt just as young as ever, 
and would never be happy again until he was settled 
on a farm and surrounded with horses, cattle, hogs, 
sheep and chickens. 

We found a beautiful farm only one and a half miles 
from town, one very much like the one we had parted 
with in Illinois, and as the owner was anxious to sell 


14 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

and we were satisfied that we would have good neigh- 
bors, we closed the deal and paid for it in full. The 
family vacated -the house in a few days and, after mak- 
ing a few repairs, we bought some furniture, moved 
in and began housekeeping once more. Walter and 
Alice, our children — I still call them children, although 
the}’ are full-grown— whom we had left with friends 
at Griggsville, arrived about this time, as did our boxes 
of goods, and we were soon as happily reunited as 
ever we had been in our old home. Benjamin took 
great pride and enjoyment in selecting and buying 
his horses, cattle, etc., with which to stock his new 
farm. 

December had arrived, and with it the cold weather ; 
Walter and Alice left for Boston to enter one of the 
colleges of that famous city, and we settled down to 
enjoy and endure the winter as best we could. We 
had brought our letters from the Griggsville Baptist 
Church, and I proposed to Benjamin that we hand them 
in to the Baptist Church and unite ourselves with the 
Christian people of our new home without delay. He 
said he had been told that the Congregational Church 
was the largest and most popular church in Greenfield, 
'was the church that Mr. Woods’ folks belonged to, 
and he thought while we were joining we had better 
join the biggest and best, most aristocratic, as it would 
help us to get into society. 

“You ought to be ashamed 'of yourself, Benjamin 
Jones,” said I. “The idea of joining a church for 
such a selfish purpose ! Thou hypocrite that you are ! 
do you suppose that I left all my Christianity in Illi-' 


HOW IT HAPPENED 


IS 

nois? You talk as if you had. No, we will join the 
church that has always been our home and was our 
choice when we first learned to love Christ. Not that 
the Congregational Church is not all right ; in fact, I 
believe it is as good as any, but it is the principle of 
the thing that I look at. I always have and always 
shall belong to church for the purpose of worshiping 
God, and not to gain an entrance into society.” 

‘‘That’s all right, Betsey; you are still on the old, 
and I reckon, right track, but you are not up to date. 
Very few people join church nowadays for the same 
reasons they did when we joined, but you can have 
your way about it ; I only thought of trying to keep 
abreast of the times when I mentioned the. matter.” 

Accordingly we joined the Baptist Church and suc- 
ceeded in getting as much into society as I cared to, 
but I did not enjoy myself as much as I expected; too 
much style for a person who had not been brought up 
to it. Benjamin, however, who seems to be growing 
softer as he grows older, was decidedly happy. 

The fact that I was the author of “Betsey Jane on 
Wheels” became known and generally circulated about 
Greenfield, and everybody stared at me and seemed 
to take so much interest in me that I felt like the fat 
woman curiosity in the side show must feel to see the 
people pay their dimes and feast their eyes on her. 

We didn’t take the daily papers, and had missed 
much of the comments on my book that was making 
me so notorious and causing people to look at me with 
so much curiosity. But I realized that I had done 
something that was making me a reputation, and I 


l6 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

was a little proud of it too. Brothers and sisters in 
the church would grasp my hand after the services 
were over, and instead of saying something about the 
sermon or the weather, would congratulate me on my 
success as a writer, and tell me that they had read my 
book and were delighted with it. On the streets, in 
the stores, and everywhere I went, it was the same 
greeting ; some were so profuse in their praises that I 
was embarrassed, and so grew to enjoy the solitude of 
home life more than any other. 

Early in the winter I began to receive letters from 
people who had read my book and wished to express 
their opinions of me and my writings. Some of them 
criticised me and my actions; they were undoubtedly 
old fogies, as I once was, and thought if a person left 
the beaten path and did something in advance of what 
their parents had done or dreamed of doing, they 
were entirely wrong, even wicked, and ought to be 
locked up. Some of the letters were from men who 
complained that I had done them an injury; their 
wives and daughters had read my book and become 
converted and even infatuated with the bicycle and 
new bloomers, and had gone nearly crazy over them. 
Benjamin said he was glad of it, didn’t pity them a 
bit; they were probably men who were too infernally 
stingy to provide their families with any means of en- 
joyment, and he hoped all the wives and daughters 
of such old skinflints would get just crazy enough to 
knock the whole top off their measly old heads. Ikit 
occasionally a woman would write and complain that 
her husband had been reading my book and become 


HOW IT HAPPENED 


17 


convinced that if ‘‘my old man” could conquer a 
wheel, he could, and was spending his money for a 
bicycle that ought to be laid out in shoes and stock- 
ings for the children. I said I was sorry, but Benja- 
min laughed and said he gloried in that fellow’s spunk, 
and hoped he would succeed in running his own busi- 
ness, notwithstanding the opposition of his “old 
woman.” 

Nearly every one of my letters came addressed 
“ Betsey Jane Jones,” which caused Benjamin to be a 
little jealous. He thought it would have looked much 
better if they had addressed me as ‘‘Mrs. Benjamin 
Jones.” I explained to him that customs were chang- 
ing with the times, and agreed that it would have been 
proper a few years ago to have addressed me as his 
wife, but now the women were being treated and ad- 
dressed as a separate and distinct being, and not at all 
associated with their husbands. He seemed more 
satisfied with my explanation than I was myself, and 
we didn’t quarrel over that point, although I rather 
prefer being called “Mrs. Benjamin Jones,” to “Bet- 
sey Jane Jones.” 

It was nearly the close of the winter when I began 
to receive letters from such noted women as Elizabeth 
Cady Stanton, Frances Elizabeth Willard, Susan B. 
x\nthony, Mar}^ Livermore and Mary Elizabeth Lease, 
all noted reform women who are prominent lights in 
the country from their efforts to emancipate their sex 
from the bondage of man. They saw in me a “new 
woman, ”a new recruit, and urged me to write a book 
devoted to their cause. They thought because I had 


1 8 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

dedicated my book on wheels to the “new woman” I 
was heartily in sympathy with them and their cause. 
Benjamin was delighted, and said I ought to write 
another book just as soon as possible. I told him I 
was perfectly satisfied with what I had already done 
and was going to stop right there, but he insisted that 
I should pitch in and “give them another whirl,” as 
he called it. I said I had nothing to write about, and 
as I had given up the idea of writing another book I 
would not be persuaded. Then more letters would 
come, praising my productions and urging me to 
write in behalf of the “new woman,” and Benjamin 
would break out again with his pleadings for another 
book. He said I ought to keep right on writing, 
since ev^erybody liked my first effort so well ; he said 
I was gifted in that particular line, and would always 
succeed if I tried. He here recalled an incident which 
happened in old Vermont when we were both scholars 
in the little district school. I had forgotten all about 
it, but Benjamin said he never could forget it. 

“Don’t you remember, Betsey,” said Benjamin, 
“ what the master said about you the last day of school 
when you read your essay ? He said, ‘That gal has got 
brains that will make her famous some day, if she is a 
poor speller and has been obliged to stand at the foot of 
her class all winter. ’ I also remember of his saying 
that ‘deep water runs still’ and ‘the stars that shine 
the brightest are not always the ones that guide the 
sailors over the trackless seas.’ Some people have 
talked themselves to the front, others fought their 
way through, but the pen is said to be mightier than 


HOW IT HAPPENED 






now IT HAPPENED 


21 


the sword, Betsey, and you know how to use it if any- 
body ever did, so pitch in and give them another 
whirl.” 

I must confess that I allowed myself to be flattered 
by Benjamin, and the ladies who wrote me such nice 
letters, and as I discovered that the “new woman” 
was cutting a prominent swath in nearly every direc- 
tion I could look, I decided, and gave my promise to 
Benjamin that I would write a book “On the New 
Woman,” and that is how it happened, and is all the 
excuse I have to offer for what I shall have to say on 
the subject. 









CHAPTER II. 


A STARTLING REVELATION. 

The winter had passed and was followed by spring, 
just the same as it had done ever since I could recol- 
lect. I was a little surprised that there hadn’t been 
some change in the general order of nature, as there 
had been in the lives and customs of our people ; and 
when I was thus reminded, by the old-time precision 
in which the seasons followed each other, that the Su- 
preme Ruler of the universe had not deviated nor 
changed His mode of doing things, I thought how 
probable it was that we poor weak mortals were all 
wronof in our mad rush after fads and fashions, and I 
called Benjamin’s attention to the fact, but he assured 
me that it was perfectly right and acceptable in the 
sight of God for His children to advance from dark- 
ness into light, and I said, ‘‘Benjamin, I guess you are 
right.” 

The warm spring rains had taken the frost out of 
the ground and settled the roads, and they were hard 
and smooth once more. Benjamin was now all taken 
up with his farm work, and displayed his old-time in- 
terest in getting his fields ready for the crops, which 
he superintended the planting and sowing of in per- 
son. How delightful is the beautiful spring ! Every- 
body has read one or more poems on spring, and thus 


22 


A STARTLING REVELATION 


23 


have had an opportunity to know all about it, even if 
they have never seen one. 

One warm evening, after a hard day’s work, Ben- 
jamin and I sat on the back door-step listening to the 
music of some early frogs that had found an element 
congenial to their nature in a small puddle of water 
made by a shower that day, when Walter and Alice 
came riding up on their wheels, having ridden all the 
way from Boston on them. After a cordial greeting 
we all entered the house, and I set about getting the 
children an extra supper, and you ought to have seen 
that boy and girl eat. 1 boasted that it was because 
“ma could beat the world cooking.” Benjamin said 
I was strictly in it when it came to cooking, but he 
thought it was owing to the exercise of riding ; said 
it always made him feel like he had just passed 
through a famine to ride any great distance. But 
Walter remarked that if I had been obliged to live on 
college boarding-house grub for six months I could 
have eaten a meal prepared by a Sioux Indian. Ben- 
jamin thought it time to turn the subject, and observed 
that the railroad people would all break up if every- 
body rode their own wheels and were as independent 
of the cars as our Walter and Alice were. 

The children were tired out from their hard day’s 
ride and retired early, but before going to their rooms 
Walter informed us that they had many things to tell 
us that would be very interesting, but would wait un- 
til morning, so that the reflections of what they might 
have to say would not cause us to lose any sleep. 
Benjamin and I wondered what it could be they had 


24 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

to sa}^ that was liable to disturb us. I fancied they 
had won honors in their classes, but Benjamin thought 
it must be some new fangle which they had learned 
all about, and was very anxious to know what it was. 
Me proceeded to turn out the cats, lock the doors and 
wind the clock, and as he laid down the bootjack to 
draw off his boots, he said: “Now, Betsey, what- 
ever it is them children have got to tell us in the 
morning, I don’t want you to fly off the handle and 
make a fuss like you did about the bicycles when it 
was first proposed to introduce them into the family. 
Whatever it is, just be calm and composed, and we 
will test the thing before condemning it.” 

I informed him that I thought I had sense enough 
to know how to act under any and all circumstances, 
and then told the old gentleman that I wanted him to 
distinctly understand that he was the one who needed 
to guard his actions most, and that if he was not care- 
ful, he would make a fool of himself before he knew it. 

We were all up bright and early the next morning, 
and Alice was the first to finish her breakfast, and 
leaving the table, she ran upstairs to her room and 
attired herself in the latest and most fashionable cos- 
tume of the day and returned to the sitting room. 
Walter then invited his father and me to come into 
the sitting room also, and listen to what they had to 
say. 

Walter had decided some two years before that he 
would educate himself for a lawyer, and was, as vve 
supposed, studying with that object in view. I opened 
the conversation by asking Walter how he was getting 


A STARTl.lNG RiiVKLATloN 


25 



‘•AlTce studying for a lawyer?’’ said I. “What do you mean? Are 
you crazy or aren’t you awake yet?” — Page 28. 


A STARTLING REVELATION 


27 


along with his studies, and if the professors thought 
he would make a good lawyer some day. 

“They thought I would make a better cook than 
law3^er,” said Walter. “They think Alice will make 
a screamer.” 

“A what ?” said I. 

“A rattling good lawyer.” 

“But what has that got to do with what I asked 
you?” said I. “What do they think of your natural 
ability to make a lawyer out of yourself?” 

“Mother,” said Walter, “the facts in the case are 
these : Times have changed wonderfully ; true, we 
have only been away six short months, but this is an 
age of progress and wonderful changes take place in 
a very short time, and too, you must remember that 
we have moved east, nearer the fountain head of all 
great reforms. You would be surprised, yes, dum- 
founded, if you were to go out and travel about a lit- 
tle, to see what changes have come over the people 
in the last half-year.” 

“Go on,” said Benjamin and I in concert. 

“Well, mother, the facts in the matter are, every- 
thing has changed, and now there are chances for the 
girls and women of our country to show their metal, 
yes, an opportunity for Alice, and you too, mother; 
think of it! Why, haven’t }’Ou heard of the ‘new 
woman’? Where have you been all winter, mother?” 

I informed him that I had noticed that there was 
such a thing in existence, and had read a little about 
the “new woman.” I recalled the letters I had re- 
ceived from the ladies who spoke of the “new woman” 


28 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


and alluded to me as one, and expressed a strong de- 
sire to know more about them. 

^•Mother, I am glad to see you so much interested,” 
said Walter, “for with this new order of things comes 
the emancipation of woman, and as you are a woman, 
of course it means a great deal to you.” 

‘‘What on earth does your mother need any such 
thing as that for?” said Benjamin. “She has had the 
whooping cough and measles and been vaccinated half 
a dozen times.” 

“Oh, father, you will understand it all when you 
see^a little more of it,” said Walter. 

“Go on, go on,”' said Benjamin, “let’s hear all 
about it ; them calves can blat their heads off if they 
want to; I will feed them after I hear you out.” 

“To make a long story short,” said Walter, “I will 
inform you that Alice has been studying for a lawj^er. 
and I have given up the idea of becoming one my- 
self.” 

“Alice studying for a lawyer?” said I. “What do 
you mean ? Are you crazy or aren’t you awake yet ? 
And what in the name of Joshua do you mean hy 
saying that you have given up the idea of becoming 
one yourself?” 

Walter informed us that it was true that he had 
given way to the “new woman,” and Alice had 
fallen in line with the whole female population and 
was fitting herself for one of the professions and oc- 
cupations that was just being opened to the women. 
At the colleges the young men were being taught to 
cook, sew, do house work and such light and grace- 


A STARTIANG REVELATION 


29 


fill duties. Some of those who were stronger were 
learning trades, such as the making of brooms, shoes, 
ladies’ and gents’ clothing, and work in the wood" and 
iron shops ; but the young ladies were all studying 
for lawyers, doctors, dentists, preachers, lecturers, 
editors, bookkeepers, merchants, and so on. Alice 
had been advised by the faculty to take up law, had 
done so, and was making fine progress and he was 
sure she would succeed. 

“ Alice Jones a lawyer ! How utterly absurd and 
foolish!” said I. “No, I will never hear to it for a 
minute, and you may as well understand it first as 
last, that no daughter of mine shall ever disgrace the 
name of Jones and Hopkins” — Hopkins was my 
maiden name — “by engaging in such a business as 
that.” 

“Hold on, mother, don’t be too fast,” said Walter; 
“remember how you condemned the use of the bicycle 
a year ago, when the craze struck us, and how you 
changed your mind and became one of its warmest 
friends; don’t be rash, mother; let’s reason together.” 

“Reason! Why, there’s no reason in it,” said I. 
“You foolish goslings, don’t you see the difference 
between riding a bicycle and practicing law ? How 
on earth is a woman going to run a law office business 
and raise a family like they should be raised?” 

Alice, who had been utterly indifferent to my argu- 
ments, and sat tilted back in her chair dressed in her 
bloomers and wearing a low-cut vest and a coat, just 
like the dudes, sprang to her feet at the mention of 
the babies, dropped her eyeglasses, screamed and 


30 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


begged me not to mention such an unpleasant and im- 
probable subject. 

“I know right from wrong, Alice Jones,'’ said I, 
“and you and that foolish brother of yours can’t switch 
me off the track. I will fight my way to the last 
ditch.” 

Alice had cooled down and resumed her former 
position, and Walter began to explain that Alice had 
no children to care for and probably never would 
have. 

“No, I don’t think she ever will have the pleasure 
of knowing the joys of a mother’s care, for no young 
man with brains would fall in love with and marry 
such an object of humanity; the attributes of a woman 
are all gone, and a poor excuse of a man you will 
make.” 

Benjamin, who had been a silent listener, said he 
guessed there were plenty of youngsters who would 
be might}^ glad to get our Alice. 

I was almost exhausted from the startling revela- 
tions that had just been sprung upon me, and as I sank 
back in the old arm-chair and pressed my hands to 
my feverish brow, I realized, and fully comprehended, 
that it was an awful condition of affairs that confronted 
me. I was sure that I had taken the proper view of 
the situation, and was determined to make a brave 
and heroic stand for the right. 

“My cup of disappointment is running over,” said 
I. “It is a bitter dose you children have given your 
mother, and best wisher, this morning. As for you, 
Walter, I had lotted a great deal on your future. I 


A STARTLING REVELATION 


31 


had thought and dreamed of you, my only son and the 
pride of my life, developing into a stalwart and manly 
man. I fancied that I could see the day when you 
would come home from your school work with your 
sheepskin and license to practice law. I pictured on 
the panorama of my imagination, you seated in an 
elegantly furnished office, surrounded by a magnificent 
library, and a sign above your door, ‘Walter H. Jones, 
Attorney at Law,’ and glowing accounts in all the 
newspapers of your achievements as a great and dis- 
tinguished counselor. I could fairly hear your voice 
ringing out clear and forcibly as you stood in the 
temples of justice, pleading the cause of your clients. 
But it is all a dream. Like the soap bubbles you chil- 
dren used to throw from the pipes, that floated and 
glistened for an instant and caused you to cry out with 
delight, then fell and bursted on the floor, so has been 
the fate of the bright and frail bubbles of my hopes. 
Oh, how many fond mothers’ hearts are bleeding this 
morning from just such wrongs!” 

‘^Stop, mother; don’t be so distressed,” said Alice. 
“I will, by my best efforts, and the help of God, be 
some day as bright and illustrious a light in the world 
as you have ever hoped to see my brother. Can’t 
you take as much pride and satisfaction in seeing me 
rise to an exalted and honorable position as you would 
Walter?” 

“By the help of God, do you say? That is absurd. 
Your great Creator never intended that you should 
desert the home to follow that which was allotted to 
man. ‘What is home without a mother?’ Look once 


32 BETSEV JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

more upon that old motto that has adorned the walls 
of our home ever since before you were born. What 
sort of a mother, or wife either, do you imagine you 
will make if you keep on with this foolishness ?” said I. 

‘‘Well, I must go and feed them calves,” said Ben- 
jamin, and so saying, took his hat and left the house 
without venturing any suggestions or opinions on the 
momentous question under discussion. 

‘‘But you must remember, mother dear, there is 
work for us to do. Duty calls and we must obey,” 
said Alice. 

“Yes, there is work for us to do. Duty calls and 
you should yield,” said I. “And that duty is, that 
you should retain all your womanly characteristics, 
win and . wed an honest, honorable and affectionate 
husband, and raise a respectable. God-fearing family ; 
as the Psalmist says, ‘their children shall rise up and 
call them blessed. ’ This, my daughter, ts your duty, 
and to see you successfully performing such a glorious 
part in this grand country of ours, is the height of m}^ 
ambition.” 

At this juncture Walter and Alice were suddenly 
seized with a desire to look over our new farm, and 
left the room abruptly, Walter saying as they did so, 
nostrum est tantas com f oner c lites,’’'' which I 
learned, by referring to my old Latin grammar, 
meant, “It is not our duty to settle such grave dis- 
putes.” 


CHAPTER III. 

MY FIRST EXPERIENCE WITH A “ NEW WOMAN.” 

The subject of Alice studying for a lawyer and 
Walter for a cook had been studiously avoided by 
Benjamin and the children, and I contented myself by 
thinking that I had made an impression on their minds 
that was doing its work. The children spent nearl}^ 
all their time gadding about the country on their 
wheels, and we got absolute^ no help from them in 
the house or on the farm. One morning I suggested 
to Walter that since he had decided to fit himself for 
a cook, that he take hold and help me out with my 
culinary duties, and at the same time get his hand in 
and keep up his practice, but he hadn’t time just then 
to do anything for me in that line, and Alice acted 
like she never expected to learn to do house work. 
But Benjamin and I were quite happy ; we were all 
enjoying good health, and the crops were coming up 
in good shape and promised a big yield, with the usual 
profits that had made us comfortably well off. 

One evening Benjamin and I rode down to Green- 
field together on our wheels to see the town and en- 
joy a little outing. We saw in the store windows 
large sheets of white paper with the picture of a young 
woman on them. Under the picture was the name 
of Mdlle. Francena Gulah, and attached to the pic- 
ture were pieces of pink paper, on which was printed 
33 


34 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


the notice that the lady was a^'new woman” and 
would lecture in the interest of her sex, at the Green- 
field opera house a few days later. Many of the Green- 
field people whom we met that evening were greatly 
interested in this coming “new woman,” and advised 
us to come and hear her lecture. Of course Benjamin 
was right in for it ; in fact, he was nearly crazy over 
the “new woman” wh/^se picture he had seen. He 
vowed that she was the handsomest woman he had 
seen for many a day, that was, if her picture didn’t 
flatter her. He said he could see in her eyes the snap 
he admired in a woman. He liked a woman who was 
an individual woman, and had the sand to stand up 
for her rights. I called his attention to the fact that 
he always grumbled, and never seemed to like me 
any the better, when I stood up for my rights and ar- 
gued and fought for such things as were right and 
proper. He said that 1 was invariablj^ in the wrong, 
and that was the reason he could not appreciate my 
character. 

Well, Benjamin was bound to go to that lecture; 
he fairly drove me mad with his everlasting talk about 
that female who was trying to fill a man’s place and 
putting all the other women up to do the same thing. 
He said we ought to get out and learn what was go- 
ing on in the world around us, and keep up with the 
procession. But I argued that a woman who went 
gadding around the country for the purpose of parad- 
ing herself before the public, and neglecting her 
family duties, was no true standard for her sex to 
pattern after, and I didn’t propose to encourage her 


EXPERIENCE WITH A “ NEW WOMAN” 


35 


by my presence. Benjamin flew into a rage and said 
he proposed to protect that helpless woman’s reputa- 
tion, especially as she was not present to speak for 
herself. He argued that it was just as proper for a 
woman to travel about the country and lecture as for 
a man to, and as for her family duties, she undoubt- 
edly had no family to be worried with. I said I did 
not blame her for not having a family if all her gen- 
tlemen acquaintances had been of his stripe, and he 
again lost his temper and informed me that he con- 
sidered himself a good catch, and if I would only re- 
lease him he would show me how quick he could 
pick up another partner. I advised him to find another 
before he let go of the woman who had guided him 
so safely and successfully for a quarter of a century. 

The day of the evening when the ‘‘new woman” 
was to lecture in Greenfield had arrived, and Benja- 
min was uneasy all day. 

“ Betsey,” said Benjamin, “you ought to go and 
hear that woman lecture to-night by all means ; peo- 
ple will notice to see whether you are there, and if 
you don’t go, it will cause talk, and the lecturer will 
be disappointed and feel slighted. Don’t you remem- 
ber what a nice letter that same woman wrote you last 
winter? Yes, I am sure you got a letter from her.” 

In order to keep peace in the family, I promised 
Benjamin and the children — they had sided right in 
with their father as usual — that I would accompany 
them to the lecture that evening. 

The afternoon was pretty well gone, and I had 
gathered and just finished marking a basket full of 


36 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

nice, large, fresh eggs with which to set some hens 
that insisted on settin’. You can always tell when a 
hen wants to set by the way she sticks to the nest and 
keeps settin’ and settin’. While speaking of settin’ 
hens, the reader will pardon me for referring to a 
certain class of people who would do well to pattern 
after a settin’ hen. A hen may not possess as large 
a brain as a woman, but she has a large stock of com- 
mon sense. Imagine a hen trying to play rooster; 
what a poor out they always make at crowing ! And a 
rooster setting to hatch eggs — why, if a rooster should 
try to set on a nest of eggs, his spurs would surely 
puncture the frail shells, and the job would be a fail- 
ure, But the dumb fowls, who can not worship God 
with words, do it most effectually by their actions. 
‘‘To know^and do the will of thy Creator, is to praise 
God.’^ Benjamin, who had been planting some pump- 
kin seeds in the corn patch across the road from the 
house, was returning home just as a woman came 
sailing down the road on a bicycle, headed for town, 
and right in front of our house her dainty little foot 
slipped off the pedal, and before she could replace it, 
the pedal had got tangled up in her skirts and she 
took the hardest tumble of her life, Benjamin was 
near by, and an eye-witness of the whole affair. He 
described it as simply terrible, not for the height to 
which she ascended and the number of revolutions she 
described before and after landing, but for the great 
force with which she struck the hard road. She used 
her head to assist in breaking the force of the fall, 
and as a consequence, was knocked insensible. Ben- 



37 





EXPERIENCE WITH A “NEW WOMAN’ ^ 


39 


jamin dropped his hoe and gathered the prostrate form 
up in his arms and carried her to the house. I had 
just finished marking the eggs, and putting the tea- 
kettle on the stove to make a start toward getting 
supper, I put on my new green sunbonnet, and with 
the basket of eggs, started out to place them under 
the respective hens. 

As I opened the door and stepped out on the plat- 
form I was knocked down and almost killed, and 
nearly every egg in the basket was broken. The 
first thing I thought of was a June cyclone. An in- 
surance agent had called at our house that very day, 
in the forenoon, and tried to insure us against wind 
storms. We declined to do business with her — it was 
a woman agent — and I told Benjamin he had better 
not insure with her, for it was more than likely she 
didn’t know her business, and it wouldn’t do any 
good ; and she warned us that the season for cyclones 
and terrible calamities was upon us and she would 
not be surprised if a tornado came our way before 
night. We didn’t scare worth a cent, however, but 
I hadn’t struck the floor before I thought of that pet- 
ticoat agent and was sorry that we didn’t let her in- 
sure us. I thought of Benjamin and the children. and 
was sure they would all be killed. It took all the 
courage I could muster to enable me to open my eyes, 
as I not only expected to see our house all in ruins, 
but myself buried under the wreck. I ^as deceived, 
yes, deceived, and terribly disappointed. I would 
rather have found my cyclone suspicions true than to 
have seen what my eyes beheld — Benjamin Jones 


40 liETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

Staggering under the weight of a real woman which 
he held in his arms. 

The force of our collision had nearly upset Benja- 
min, and I was sorry that it hadn’t; he kept his feet, 
however, by skillful maneuvers ; his face was as red 
as fire, and the cords on his throat and neck stood out 
like the ribs of a hunting dog ; he was straining every 
nerve, and I thought his eyes would pop right out of 
his head. 

“Drop that, Benjamin Jones,” said I. 

“I will drop,” said Benjamin, “if you don’t get 
out of the way and let me into the house.” 

“What on earth have you got a woman in your 
arms for, Benjamin Jones?” said I. “Do you think 
I am going to put up with any such foolishness as 
this? See, you have broken all my settin’ eggs, and 
besmeared me and the walk with them.” 

Walter and Alice, who had just rode up on their 
wheels and took in the situation, begged me to stand 
aside and let father in with his charge. I hobbled 
out of the way — pretending, of course, that I was hurt 
much worse than I really was — and Benjamin carried 
the woman right in and laid her on my bed, and Wal- 
ter was on his bicycle and half-way to Greenfield for 
a doctor before I recovered my senses. 

Benjamin tried to explain how it all happened, and 
why he had carried a woman in his arms, and told 
me to go to her at once, as she was hurt very badly 
and would probably die before the doctor got there. 
I was indignant, and told him if he was half as much 
interested in me as he was in this unknown woman, 


experience with a ‘^new woman’’ 41 

he could see that I was also badly hurt and needed 
attention as well as a stranger. 

‘‘You hurt, Betsey?” said Benjamin. “What could 
have hurt you,? I was the one who got struck, and 
if I don’t complain you certainly ought not to.” 

I was mad, and Benjamin was not long in finding it 
out either. “You must be a dummy to think that a 
person of my build could be knocked down by such a 
combination as you and that female, and not be hurt,” 
said I. But I did not stop to quarrel, as I wanted to 
get myself cleaned up and the egg juice removed 
from the platform before it got tracked all over the 
house. 

I had just finished cleaning up the egg-knock when 
Doctor Squills arrived and hastened to the patient on 
m}" bed. I saw by his looks that it was a serious 
case, and so went into the room and inquired after her 
condition. The doctor said she had received a very 
serious injury, but he thought she would pull through 
with careful nursing. 

She came to her senses and talked a little before 
the doctor left, and I heard her tell him to have the 
manager of the opera house announce, that owing to 
a slight accident, she would be unable to appear that 
evening as advertised, but would fill the engagement 
in a few days. 

It then dawned upon me that we had a real “new 
woman” in our house, which was not at all pleasing 
to me. Benjamin, however, was elated, and said he 
was glad that the accident happened when and where 
it did, as long as it had to happen. He was thoroughly 


42 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


captivated, and vve could hardly get him away from 
her long enough to eat his meals. 

A delegation from the ‘‘Young Woman’s Athletic 
Society” came out from town in a couple of hours 
after the doctor had gone, and two of their number 
volunteered to sit up with the unfortunate woman, for 
which I was thankful. Mdlle. Francena was much 
better the next morning ; her mind seemed to be as 
clear as a church bell, only she was weak from the 
shock. The doctor called again during the forenoon 
and pronounced his patient out of danger, but advised 
her to remain with us for a while and keep very 
quiet. 

The news soon spread over the country that we had 
a “new woman” at our house, and that I was in sym- 
pathy with the “new woman” movement and all that 
they advocated, which was very mortifying to me, as 
I certainly never had taken any stock in the “new 
woman” business. I didn’t want to see any “new 
woman” any more than I wanted to see a “new 
man.” The same “old woman” and the same “old 
man” was good enough for me, and I was not the 
kind of a person to be carried away with every new 
fad that comes along, especially one that threatened 
*ja complete revolution of our social, commercial, pro- 
fessional and domestic systems. 

The second day after the accident Mademoiselle 
was able to sit up and take an active part in all our 
conversations, and we naturally fell to discussing her 
accident and the subject of her cause. I told her that 
if she had worn bloomers instead of skirts she would 


EXPERIENCE WITH A “NEW WOxMAn” 


43 


not have got tangled up in her bicycle and nearly 
killed. Although she was a radical on the “new 
woman” craze, she did not believe in the bloomer 
costume, and cited the fact that Dr. Mary Walker 
was mobbed by an English audience more than thirt}'- 
hve years ago for appearing in bloomers and advocat- 
ing a dress reform. 

•‘Dr. Mary Walker,” said I, “donned and advocated 
the use of the entire outfit of a man, and the English 
were justified in mobbing her and putting a stop to 
such foolishness, but at home she was only laughed at 
by the tolerating and humor-loving Americans. Where 
us American women missed it was when we didn't 
follow the style set by the author of the bloomers, 
Amelia Bloomer, who was also an American woman, 
and the first to endeavor to do away with the old cos- 
tume. Away back in 1848, Amelia Bloomer wore 
and advocated the adoption of the original bloomer 
suit, which was composed of long, full trousers to the 
ankles, with frills, short skirt with many ruffles, man’s 
coat, vest and neck-gear, and broad brimmed, be- 
ffowered leghorn hat. This was not a bad costume, 
but its ugliness defeated the good intentions of its au- 
thor, and instead of adopting something sensible along 
that line, we run to hoop skirts, and the women of 
that period resembled a modern balloon.” 

Mdlle. Franc.ena said she was not so particular 
about the bloomers or skirts, was not advocating dress 
reform, did not care to wear bloomers herself, but had 
no war to make on those who did. as many of the 
“new women,” in fact most of them, wore bloomers. 


44 


BEl'SEY JANE ON TIIE NEW WOMAN 


She was directing all her energies to the emancipation 
of her seX) and had no time to argue dress reform. 

This particular “new woman” was a smooth and 
long-winded talker, and reminded me of an eight-day 
clock. She was at our house just a week and one 
daj^ and never run down during the whole time. 
Benjamin was perfectl}^ captivated with her and her 
new ideas, as were Walter and Alice. I became so 
disgusted — I was not jealous — that I finally suggested 
to her that she was able to travel, and her talk would 
be more appreciated somewhere else. 

Benjamin had become so much attached to her that 
it almost broke his heart thinking of her going away 
from us, but she promised him that she would return 
and spend her summer vacation with us on the farm, 
and he was pacified. 

Renewing her engagements at Greenfield and other 
points where she had been advertised to lecture, 
Mdlle. Francena delivered her lecture in our little 
city on Monday evening and left for the next town 
the following day. I did not go* to the lecture, as I 
was quite satisfied with hearing her talk for a week, 
but Benjamin and the children were there and occu- 
pied front seats. 

That woman had put the very old boy into Benja- 
min, and he seemed to be losing his reason. lie lost 
all interest in the farm work and talked of nothing 
but the “new woman” and her cause, and was very 
anxious for me to begin to write my new book on the 
“new woman.” He wanted me to pitch in and help 
them out. The idea struck me favorably., and I de- 
termined to begin writing at the earliest possible time. 


CHAPTER IV. 


THE BEGINNING OF OUR JOURNEY. 

Now that “ new woman^” who had been accidentally 
thtoWh into our family circle, caused me considerable 
uneasiness of mind. I was not jealous of Benjamin, 
but I didn’t like his actions a little bit, and she had 
also sti*engthened Walter and Alice in their nonsensi- 
cal notions about their future plans and purposes. 
Alice was now all the moi*e determined to become a 
lawyer, and Walter and his father were correspond- 
ingly anxious that she should carry out her plans. I 
saw that it would be folly for me to try to argue with 
them further j and so abandoned the subject for the 
present. But the 'thoughts of that woman coming 
back to spend her summer vacation with us was a 
great worry to me, and I determined to balk her and 
Benjamin in their plans if possible. 

Benjamin kept urging me to begin writing my book, 
and I made the excuse that I wasn’t posted sufficiently 
on the subject to warrant me in undertaking the 
work. I told him that I hadn’t been around to see 
for myself to what extent the “new woman” had de- 
veloped and come into use. “I ought to ^o out and 
rub up against the world a little, and learn something 
of the new order of things, before attempting to write 
on such an important thing as the' ‘new woman’ 
claimed to be,” said I. 


45 


46 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

“If you had listened to what Mdlle. Francenar told 
us,” said Benjamin, “you would haye known all about 
the ‘new woman’ without going to the expense of 
traveling around to see for yourself.” 

“That’s just like you men,” said 1; “expense al- 
ways cuts a big figure in anything a woman wants to 
do. but if I am going to write a book I propose to go 
and see for myself what 1 am to write about.” 

Benjamin was so pleased with the idea of my writ-, 
ing the book that he readily gave in, and agreed with 
me that I should take a trip. I did not want to go 
alone, and as I was anxious and determined that I 
would get Benjamin awa}^ from home before that 
“new woman” returned, I suggested that he accom- 
pany me and we go on our wheels. He was de- 
lighted with the idea, and it was arranged that we 
should start just as soon as possible. 

We purchased bicycle valises for our wheels and 
had them fitted in position in the frames. I had two 
new bicycle costumes made, which I like much better 
now than the bloomers, and Benjamin also furnished 
his wardrobe with new and regulation bicycle suits. 
We were all ready to start and had our luggage 
packed before we had decided upon the route which 
we would travel. Benjamin wanted to go westward, 
the direction in which his “new woman” friend was 
traveling, but I didn't propose to take any chances of 
meeting her, and had procured a pocket map and 
marked out a route leading in the opposite direction, 
which I insisted on following, and Benjamin was so 
anxious to go that he did not object; said, as the trip 


THE BEGIxNNING OF OUR JOURNEY 


47 



And mounting our wheels, were soon out of sight of the house.— 
Page 49. 




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THE BEGINNING OF OUR JOURNEY 49 

was for my benefit, I could take the lead and he would 
follow. 

We were up bright and early the next morning, and 
after eating a hearty breakfast and giving Walter and 
Alice instructions for the last time as to what they 
should and should not do during our absence, and 
Benjamin had told the hired man over again how he 
wanted the farm work done, we were ready for our 
start on what proved to be a very memorable trip for 
both of us. We kissed the children good-bye, took a 
farewell look at everything about the place, and 
mounting our wheels, were soon out of sight of the 
house, as we went spinning down the road by the old 
red schoolhouse, leaving Greenfield and all our 
neighbors and friends in the rear. 

We did not go around and bid our friends good- 
bye ; I didn’t want them to know my plans, and didn’t 
care to be bothered with their advice as to where and 
how we ought to go, or whether we ought to go at 
all. As neither of us was used to long rides, I told 
Benjamin we would take it easy for the first few days 
and get hardened to the work before we made any 
big days’ runs. 

It was a lovely day ; the sun was shining brightly, 
and a cool breeze touched caressingly the dainty 
flowers and numerous roses — of which the month of 
June is so prolific — that drooped their fragrant heads 
by the roadside; the birds twittered soft words of 
love to their nest mates, and all nature seemed to be 
doing its best to make our journey a pleasant one. 

Benjamin, who has an eye for the beautiful, re-* 


50 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

marked that it was the happiest moment of his life, 
and he wished that he might always roll on in such 
scenes of blissful happiness. I told him that I was 
glad to see him enjoying the trip while the conditions 
were so favorable, but reminded him that there would 
undoubtedly be a change in affairs before many days, 
and our sailing would not always be so pleasant. Ben- 
jamin said it was probably a weather breeder, and 
that to-morrow or next day it would rain pitchforks 
or a cyclone would make boarding-house hash of us. 

1 said I did not take any stock in weather breeders, 
but always thanked God for a beautiful day and hoped 
for more to follow ; but we must expect some stormy 
as well as fair weather, and always be prepared to 
take it as it comes. He thought that a good begin- 
ning certainly meant a bad ending, but I failed to un- 
derstand why we should meet with a disaster before 
we got back home because we had not been killed 
before we had been out half a day. 

We were going down the beautiful valley of the 
Connecticut River, and arriving at the home of an ac- 
quaintance, some ten miles from our place, about noon, 
we were hospitably received and fed, after which we 
proceeded on our journey. We passed through sev- 
eral small towns and villages, but saw little worthy 
of note until we arrived at Northampton, a city of 
about 15,000 inhabitants, where we concluded to put 
up for the night. We registered at the Transient 
House, the largest and best hotel in the cit}^ and were 
shown our room in the third stoiy. I objected to go- 
ing up so high, for fear of fire, but the hotelderk in- 


THE BEGINNING OF OUR JOURNEY 


5i 




It puzzled me at first to distinguish some of the women from the men. Page 53. 



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Tllli BEGINNING OF OUR JOURNEY 53 

formed us that the rooms on the floors below were all 
taken, but that I need have no fears of not being able 
to make my escape safely in case of a fire, for each 
room on that floor was provided with a fire escape, a 
large rubber hose, which we were to throw out of the 
window and slide down through in case of a fire. It 
looked rather small to accommodate me, but the young 
lady clerk said it would stretch, and they were war- 
ranted to fit and safely land the largest or smallest 
person living. 

After eating our supper we went into the large 
office and sat down, to be in a better position to watch 
the people atid study their habits and custotns. I was 
not lonely there, neither did I feel that I was out of 
place, for more than half the people who were loiter- 
ing there or coming and going, were women. It puz- 
zled me at first to distinguish some of the women from 
the men, the dress was so much alike, but I noticed 
that some of the guests carried so many more bundles 
and packages than others, and that those who were 
loaded down with all sorts of luggage were women. 
If you can’t get a good square look into the face of 
the person you suspect to be a woman, just notice 
their luggage and you can always tell by the quantity 
of it, if it be male or female. 

I had been sitting there about an hour studying the 
different characters, when the hotel bus backed up to 
the front door and unloaded some passengers. Among 
them was a young woman about twenty or twenty- 
two; she had black hair, cut quite short, and dark 
eyes ; her cheeks were rosy and flushed, her hands 


54 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


and feet were delicate, and her figure erect. She 
carried a large sample case like those used by the old- 
fashioned New York drummer for a wholesale gro- 
cery house, an ordinary traveling valise, two band- 
boxes, two or three other small boxes, several bundles 
of various shapes and sizes, an umbrella and a gossa- 
mer, and to cap it all, a bird cage containing a live 
canary. She glanced quickly about the room as she 
proceeded to the counter, fairly staggering under the 
immense load. Depositing the whole paraphernalia 
on the bar and signing the register, she was assigned 
a room, which I afterward learned was directly across 
the hall from our room on the third floor. 

The ladylike clerk rang a big bell or gong which 
sat on the counter, and two burly negroes came run- 
ning up. They were given hasty instructions, when 
they began picking up the trappings which belonged 
to the late arrival, and it was about all those two big, 
stout fellows could do to carry them up the stairs. 
The young lady was ushered into the dining room, 
and we saw no more of her for an hour. 

In the hotel building, and adjoining the office, was a 
saloon and billiard room, but I noticed that it was not 
very well patronized. I did not like the idea of 
boarding in the same house with a saloon, and told 
the landlord — who, by the way, was a landlady — so. 
But she assured me that if I stopped there on our re- 
turn the nuisance, as I termed it, would not be there. 
The man who was running it was losing money every 
day, could not pay his rent, and she had ordered him 
out. I inquired the cause of the failure, and was in- 


THE BEGINNING OF OUR JOURNEY 55 

formed by the business-like “new woman” that since 
more than half of the traveling salespeople and agents 
of all kinds were women, the amount of business 
done by the saloon had decreased in the same propor- 
tion in which the women had displaced the men. 
The “new woman,” she said, might be justly accused 
of aping the men in many respects, but they never 
patronized the saloons or gambling houses. 

The evening was so pleasant that we concluded to 
walk around the town and 'see some of the sights. 
The first thing that attracted my attention, as we 
walked down the street, was the police officers, who 
were all women, large, muscular handsome women 
like myself. They were dressed in light-blue bloom- 
ers, long coats buttoned up to the chin, and a regu- 
lation officer’s cap, all of the same color. They 
carried clubs, and wore belts in which were supported 
revolvers, cartridges, handcuffs and other trappings 
usually used by such officers. 

We engaged in conversation with one of them, and 
she informed us that since the women had been given 
the ballot and the privilege of holding office, they had 
been running things their own way in Northampton. 
“They had some politicians in their ranks, women who 
had been training with the woman’s suffragists orga- 
nizations for years, and they took the lead and told 
the rest of us, who were not posted, how to vote and 
act. We began by electing every officer in the city, 
from mayor down, and the mayor began business by 
firing all the men who were holding appointed offices, 
and appointing women in their places, and that’s the 
reason we are on the police force.” 


Jo BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

I thanked the ladylike officer for her kindness, and 
then informed her that I was traveling to learn all I 
could about the “new woman,” and that Benjamin 
was my husband and was going along with me for 
company. 

She said that was right, that it was nice to have a 
husband to keep one company, but she kept a husband 
to do the house work and take care of the children. 
“But if you are looking for new women,” said she, 
“there goes the Hon. Mrs. Mayor Blunt; she is the 
first ‘new woman’ in Northampton, holds the highest 
office in the gift of the city and keeps the best cloth- 
ing store in town.” 

The woman referred to had just rode up in front of 
a large clothing store, across the street, and dismounted 
from a wheel ; she was tall and dignified, and wore 
the nobbiest bloomer costume I had yet seen. 

“That man coming down the street there, wheel- 
ing the baby cab,” continued the officer, “is John 
Blunt, husband of Mrs. Mayor Blunt. He has got 
his supper dishes washed up, and is out for a walk 
earlier than usual this evening.” 

I noticed a considerable number of men on the streets 
and was informed that they came out early to exer- 
cise, for when the 8 130 o’clock whistle sounded they 
were all obliged to be at home or off the streets. Any 
man caught on the streets after that time was arrested 
and marched to his home, the first and second times, 
but for the third and subsequent offenses they were 
sent to the city lock-up and placed on the stone pile 
the following day. No exceptions were made unless 


THE BEGINNING OK OUR JOURNEY 


57 



The police officers, who were all women, large, muscular, handsoijie 
women like myself. — Page 55. 


J 


THE BEGINNING OF OUR JOURNEY 


59 


a man had a special permit from the mayor. I said 
I supposed Mr. Blunt could stay out as late as he 
pleased and no questions were asked, since his wife 
was the mayor. 

‘‘Not much, he can’t,” said she; “he gets for home 
at a lively pace when the whistle blows ; the maj^or 
makes an example of him, and the other men of the 
city quake with fear. VVh}^, if John Blunt disobej^ed 
one of her orders, she would annihilate him and leave 
only his carcass as a tradition to scare offending men 
and stalk a warning spectei ilown the paths of unborn 
generations.” 

Benjamin said, in a trembling voice, that it was 
getting late and we had better return to the hotel. 
1 saw that he was frightened, and so accompanied him 
to our room in the top story of the Transient House. 


CHAPTER V. 

THE “new woman” in full pdwer. 

The young woman with the many packages, who 
occupied the room opposite ours, saw me when we 
came in, and at once introduced herself. She was 
very lonesome, and said that she would like to get 
acquainted with me and have a long talk. She said 
that I resembled her mother in size and looks so much 
that it made her homesick the very minute she set 
her eyes on me. I pitied the poor thing, and invited 
her to come into our room and spend the evening with 
us. She was such a tender-hearted girl, with a lov- 
able disposition, and I saw at once that she had been 
led astray b}' the “new woman” craze. She told me of 
her kind and affectionate old mother, who had labored 
and sacrificed all her life for her welfare ; she had an 
indulgent father and a loving brother, all of whom 
idolized and worshiped her, but she had ignored their 
kind words of advice and protecting care, and had 
launched out into the big, cold, bustling world to 
“make or break,” “sink or swim,” “live or die;” 
she was bound to go it single-handed and alone, so 
she said. 

I saw that this young woman, like most of our 
American girls, had a fine eye and a ready tongue 
and was a companionable person. In this respect I 
have noticed that the girls outstrip their brothers and 
6o 


THE ^‘nEW woman’* IN FULL POWER 6 1 

lovers. As a rule the boys are bashful and a little 
awkward, while the girls have tact and ability at a 
much earlier period in their lives than young men, if 
they ever do acquire such accomplishments. 

I also observed that this young lady had not in- 
clined toward the men in the matter of dress and oc- 
cupation alone ; she had adopted the language of the 
stock exchange, the race course and clubs, and all this 
change was made, so she claimed, with a view to 
making herself more agreeable to the opposite sex. 
But how such traits of character in a young lady 
were going to make her more agreeable or attractive 
to the young men, I must confess I do not understand ; 
but she was in no mood to be scolded or argued with, 
and so I tried to entertain and enliven her drooping 
spirits. 

After giving a graphic account of her home life and 
surroundings, and the influences that had led her to 
what she was, and away from home, she told me that 
she represented a shoe factory, with a line of their 
goods, but the shoe dealers were all supplied or didn’t 
have room to place her goods, wasn’t what they 
wanted, prices too high, times too hard, or some other 
of a hundred excuses they all made. She had been 
out nearly two weeks and had sold but one little bill 
of goods, and that was to an old man in an out-of-the- 
way town. The shoe stores were invariably owned 
and operated by women, she said, and they had no 
preference or pity for a woman drummer, and she was 
disgusted and nearl}^ heart-broken, 

Benjamin said it was a shame; if he was runnings 


62 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


shoe Store he would buy a big bill of goods from her 
and give her a letter of recommendation to all the 
other dealers of his acquaintance. But he wasn’t in 
the shoe business and I was glad of it ; these female 
saleswomen would have him bankrupt before he 
knew where he was at. 

She told her story with tears in her eyes, and when 
she looked at me she would burst right out and boo- 
hoo for all she was worth; she said she couldn’t help 
it, I looked so much like her mother. Finally I told 
her that it was bed time and she must stop her crying 
and go to her room, but she cried all the harder when 
I tried to send her away, and begged of me to let her 
sleep with me, and send Benjamin into her room. I 
said that was all nonsense and told her not to be a 
baby if she ever expected to be a man. But Benja- 
min, whose heart is as soft as his head, pleaded with 
me to do as she requested. Think if it was our 
Alice,” said he; “wouldn’t you feel hard toward this 
young woman’s mother if she wouldn’t be a mother 
to her under such circumstances?” 

I told him if our Alice ever went out on such a 
business I hoped she would get the cold shoulder from 
every one she came in contact with. But they both 
begged so hard that I consented, and Benjamin bid us 
good-night and crossed the hall to the young shoe 
drummer’s room. 

Just as he was crossing the hall, an employ^ of the 
hotel saw him and located the room in which he went. 
She immediately reported the fact to the landlady, 
who was very indignant, and said that she had her 


THE ‘^NEW woman” IN FULL POWER 63 



I saw at once that she had been led astray by the “new woman” craze. 
— Page 60. 


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THE "‘NEW woman’* IN FULL POWER 


suspicions about that man the very moment she set 
her eyes on him, and, as usual, she was not mistaken 
in her prognostications. “When I see a bald-headed 
man with a sharp nose and chin, I always set him 
down as one who will bear watching,” said the land- 
lady. She was very indignant at both Benjamin and 
the young woman, and she would throw them both 
into the street, and me with them, for no decent woman 
would travel with such a man as Benjamin had proved 
himself to be. 

She summoned the mayor and her police, and head- 
ing the procession, started for the room occupied by 
Benjamin and the supposed woman who was disgrac- 
ing her house. Myself and the innocent young woman 
had just blowed out the gas and retired, when we 
heard the tramp of the invading hosts ; the next in- 
stant a loud knock was heard on the door of Benja- 
min’s room, and the demand for an entrance. Ben- 
jamin was frightened, and instead of obeying the 
order of the intruders, covered up his head with the 
bed clothes. Before I could realize what was going 
on, they had burst open the door and were dragging 
my innocent old husband out of his bed and room in 
the roughest manner possible. He screamed for help. 
“Help, Betsey! Help, Betsey!” rang out above the 
din and confusion caused by the struggle. I rushed 
out into the hall and saw a dozen infuriated women 
dragging poor Benjamin along the hall in his night 
clothes, and him struggling and calling for help. I 
rushed in and demanded a halt in the proceedings, but 
the frenzied ruffians — for ruffians they were — paid no 


66 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

attention to me. I saw that something must be done 
or Benjamin would be torn in pieces. I could not 
imagine what he had done that they should treat him 
in such a shameful manner, but believed him to be 
innocent of any crime that could warrant such treat- 
ment. Without hesitating an instant longer, I laid my 
hands on the woman who was apparently leading the 
mob, and exerting all my powers I was surprised to 
see the effects of my efforts ; that female fairly flew, 

I slung her as you would a cat ; and seizing one after 
another, it was a very short time before I was the un- 
disputed master of the situation. My strength was a 
marvel to me as well as to my victims. I demanded 
an explanation, which the landlady attempted to give, 
but I assured her that she was misinformed, and all 
her efforts to avenge an imaginary outrage on the 
dignity of herself and house were malicious, as she 
had attacked an innocent man. She was loth to be- 
lieve my story about the change in the rooms, but my 
threat to sue for damages had a quieting effect upon 
her and she withdrew her forces from the battlefield. 

Benjamin had crawled back into his room as soon 
as possible after being released, where I found him 
and dressed his wounds. His face and hands were 
badly scratched, and his limbs and body bruised in a 
hundred places. The landlady sent a servant up with 
a lot of court plaster and several bottles of liniment, 
which we made good use of, and got along without 
calling a doctor. 

Benjamin was terribly excited and kept up a con- 
tinuous tirade about them “blarsted wo’bemen,” as 




4 



V 


THE “NEW^V^OMAN’’ IN FULL POWER 


69 


he called the “new woman.” He cursed the day that 
God took that rib from Adam and made it into a 
woman. I scolded him severely for his foolish talk 
and reminded him of the fact that his mother was a 
woman, and if there never had been a woman created 
he would not have been here. 

‘‘ Here to enjoy myself with them as I have just 
been doing!” said Benjamin. 

My scoldings were valuable in one thing, if noth- 
ing more ; it seerped so natural to him to hear my 
voice raised in condemnation of his actions that he 
came to his senses and realized where he was, but did 
not know the cause of the attack and brutal punish- 
ment he had suffered at the hands of the landlady and 
her crowd. He thought he had violated some of the 
city ordinances and that was the manner which the 
“new women” had of meting out justice to offend- 
ing men. I explained to him how it all happened as 
best I could, and urged him to be quiet. Miss Don- 
gola and I sat by his bed the whole night and suc- 
ceeded in quieting him to some extent, but he was 
flighty and kept talking about them “wo’bemen.” 
Whenever he would fall asleep, which was very sel- 
dom, he imagined he could see the Hon. Mayor Blunt 
with her female police force swooping down on him. 

“Let ’em come, dum ’em, let ’em come. I can 
whip a forty-acre field of wo’bemen. Come on, you 
petticoat brigade, come on. Dum the wo’bemen,” 
said Benjamin in his delirious condition. 

I shall always remember that, our first night out, 


70 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

as the niglit of horrors ; it was the worst I ever ex- 
perienced or ever want to. 

Morning dawned at last, and we were all glad to 
see the Kirst gray streaks of light breaking in the east, 
Benjamin was determined to get out of that place, so 
he dressed himself and we went down to an early 
breakfast. He was a sight to behold ; if he had ever 
been good looking he was certainly far from it that 
morning, with his face covered with plasters and his 
countenance all harrowed up, and so lame that he 
could hardly step ; but he was innocent of the crime 
for which he had been punished, and that made me 
feel proud. 

The landlady came into the dining room and apolo- 
gized, and said ^‘the laugh was on her and her crowd,” 
and told Benjamin not to feel badly about it. 

Benjamin said he could understand how they could 
be mistaken, but he couldn’t see where the laugh came 
in. 

Miss Dongola was too much broken up over the 
affair and the notoriety she had gained by having her 
name mentioned in connection with the scrimmage, to 
come into the dining room. I ordered the landlady to 
have her breakfast sent to. her room, which she 
hastened to do. The young woman was thoroughly 
disgusted with the business she had embarked in and 
the whole new woman idea, and after bidding us fare- 
w'ell, ‘took an early train for her home, where she de- 
clared she would stay during the remainder of her 
life, be it long or short. 

Immediately after breakfast I settled our hotel bill—. 


THE “new woman’’ IN FULL POWER 7 I 



A large crowd had gathered in front of the hotel and cheered us as 
we rode out of the town. — Page 73* 



THE ‘‘new woman” IN FULL POWER 


73 


I carried the pocketbook — and we were soon mounted 
on our wheels and ready to bid adieu to Northamp- 
ton and all its unpleasant features. ,A large crowd 
had gathered in front of the hotel and cheered us as 
we rode out of the town. 


CHAPTER VI. 

WE ENCOUNTERED A DOMESTIC CYCLONE. 

Benjamin thought we had had experience enough 
to enable me to write half a dozen books about the 
new woman, and wanted to return home, but I was 
not the kind of a person to be so easily discouraged, 
and told him that I proposed to go right on in the 
course I had mapped out. He said both of us would 
probably be attacked and killed at the next place we 
stopped, and if there were any more wo’bemen like 
Uiose of Northampton, he didn’t propose to risk his 
life by going among them. I told him it was only 
an accident, that accidents v/ere liable to happen to 
the best of people, and since we had had a streak of 
bad luck the first day of our travel, we would, ac- 
cording to his notions, have clear sailing the remainder 
of our trip. This seemed to satisfy him and he con- 
sented to go on, but said that he would never put up 
at another hotel that was run by a wo’beman. 

Leaving Northampton, we rode toward the east, 
keeping on the north of the Holyoke mountain range, 
and as the sun mounted the heavens it shot its cruel 
rays down on our heads with terrific force. I wore 
a sailor hat, which protected my face, but Benjamin, 
who had always worn a luWd brimmed hat, had on 
this occasion nothing but a little cap with a very small 
front piece, and the sun shone on his bruised ^nd 


WE ENC0UNTI':RED a domestic cyclone 


peeled face without the least interruption, and its 
effects were soon visible. The bruised parts began 
to bulge out and fairly made the strips of court plas- 
ter snap, the small portion of his face that had not 
been skinned by the women of Northampton now be- 
gan to peel off, and Benjamin voted unanimously that 
traveling by cycle through an enemy’s country was a 
failure. But the second day of our travel wore away, 
and the cruel sun flaunted his myriad colors in our 
backs and disappeared behind a big hill around which 
the road wound and led us into West Ware, without 
wasting a regret upon poor Benjamin. 

We rode up to a dingy little burg that contained a 
small depot, a postoffice, one store, a blacksmith shop 
and a few houses, situated on the east bank of Swift 
River. I wanted to push on to a larger town, but Ben- 
jamin said he would rather spend the night there, pro- 
viding any of the few families who resided there would 
keep us, than risk a larger place. He thought it possi- 
ble that the new woman had not yet struck so small a 
place, and we could enjoy an old-fashioned night’s 
rest and not be dragged out of our beds and killed be- 
fore morning. I consented to stop there, providing 
we could get accommodations, and selecting the neat- 
est appearing cottage in the place, we rode up to the 
open door and inquired of the lady if w'^ could get 
lodging and meals, explaining that we were out for a 
trip and had gone as far that day as our strength 
would permit. She said we might stay for all she 
cared, but we would have to see her husband about 
it, as he was the one who would have us to wait upon 


76 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

if we stayed. The husband soon appeared, having 
been summoned from the kitchen by his wife, and it 
was an easy matter to make a bargain with him. He 
was anxious to keep us, for that would afford him an 
opportunity to earn some pin money, of which he was 
greatly in need. 

We were soon seated at the supper table and served 
with a good meal which had been prepared by the 
masculine part of the family. The wife had learned 
telegraphy before she was married, and was then hold- 
ing the position of operator and agent for the railroad 
company at that place, while her husband, who had 
learned to cook when a boy, on account of his mother 
being an invalid and there being no girls in the family, 
found it very handy to adapt himself to the arrange- 
ments whereby he did all the house work and his wife 
all the hustling for a living. 

Benjamin agreed with our hosts that they were 
managing things just right; how handy it was, he 
said, to have a wife who can make a living for the 
family, and how nice for the wife to have a husband ♦ 
who could cook and do the house work ! He was com- 
pletely captivated with the idea, and forgot all about 
his aches and pains while trying to demonstrate to me 
that a man with such a wife and a woman with such 
a husband could easily make two fortunes while or- 
dinary people, working in the old way, were strug- 
gling to make both ends meet. He wanted me to sit 
right down and write to Walter and tell him to pitch 
in and learn to be a good cook, and then marry a 
woman who could make him a living ; and while I 


WE ENCOUNTERED A DOMESTIC CYCLONE 77 

was writing, to tell Alice to be sure and not fall in 
love with a young man who couldn’t cook. I told 
him that I was in no hurry to indorse the household 
turn-around affair, but would wait and see how the 
plan worked, and as for there being any particular 
advantage in a man doing his wife’s work and the 
wife doing her husband’s duties, I couldn’t see it as 
clearly as he pretended to. 

The night at West Ware passed without any acci- 
dents, but our sleep was not unbroken, for the mos- 
quitoes were large and numerous and very industrious, 
and the frogs kept up a constant croaking. Benja- 
min was well satisfied, however, and said he preferred 
the small towns and private families to the large 
towns and feminine hotels. 

The sun rose bright and clear the next morning, 
and after partaking of a plain but substantial break- 
fast, we mounted our wheels and began our third 
day’s travel. As we went on farther from home we 
saw more signs of the new woman rule ; we passed 
several gangs of men working on the roads, all being 
under the supervision of women ; usually three female 
bosses w^ere overseeing the work. We stopped, and 
I inquired of one of the bosses what it meant that the 
women were out overseeing the work of repairing the 
roads. She informed me that the women had tired 
of man rule and had taken matters into their own 
hands. “We have had poor roads and misrule in 
public affairs long enough,” she said, “and so we 
women all went to the polls and elected a complete 
set of town officers ; us three ladies you see here are 


78 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


the road commissioners, and we are trying to put the 
roads in our town in passable condition. When the 
men were running things they would send a force of 
men out to work on the roads, and they would plow 
and scrape the road up in uneven heaps and leave it 
to be smoothed down by use ; they studied more how 
to kill time than how to do good work, and as a con- 
sequence we had rough and almost impassable roads. 
We have compelled the men under us to put in good 
time, and by using good judgment, have succeeded in 
building good, hard and level roads with just enough 
hump in them to shed the rain water, and they don’t 
cut all to pieces for having been left rough, and don’t 
upset you when you turn out to pass a neighbor. We 
have forbidden the use of narrow tires on heavy 
wagons, and by the use of wide tires we expect the 
roads to improve with use.” 

She was a very business-like woman, and had a 
commanding way about her that made everjThing go 
her way. The men who were driving the teams and 
working the road fairly flew at the slightest wave of 
her hand, and there was not one among them who 
dared venture even a suggestion. 

The noon hour had arrived, and at a signal from 
the head boss the force turned out for dinner. The 
lad}^ who* had so kindly entertained and enlightened 
us regarding their new order of business, invited us 
to go to her home and dine with her. She said that 
hers was the first house down the road in the direc- 
tion we were traveling, and the meal would be all 
ready when we got there. She boasted that her hus- 


WE ENX'OUNTERED A DOMESTIC CYCEONE 79 



But the new woman carried the day and Sam Gregory had to get the 


dinner, — Page 82 . 



WE ENCOUNTERED A DOMESTIC CYCLONE 8 1 

band was a very likely fellow and had learned to do 
house work in a remarkably woman-like manner ; she 
was proud of him, but said we should give her the 
credit for his cleverness, as she had made him what 
he was. 

We accepted our friend’s offer of hospitality and 
rode on to the house with her. On entering the house 
we found things a little different than I had fancied 
we would find them. Instead of a good steaming 
noonday meal resting on the dining room table, in- 
viting our hungry stomachs to partake, we encountered 
a domestic cyclone. The mistress of the house and 
roads had abandoned, as she must needs do, the en- 
tire household duties to her husband, who did not seem 
to like the chang^i and was a very awkward house- 
keeper. The baby had been screaming all the fore- 
noon, and all he could do was of no avail to quiet him. 
He wanted his mamma, and would not be comforted 
with anything short of a female caress. The fire in 
the cook stove had gone out several times, and when 
he did finally get it to burn, it burned so hard and 
fast that the meat and potatoes were also burned. And 
so it had gone ; everything was working against him 
and he was thoroughly disgusted with the whole affair. 
He told his wife that if she wanted dinner for herself 
and friends she would have to get it, for he could not 
and would not. I had often heard women kick be- 
cause their husbands brought company home with 
them for a meal, but it was something entirely new 
to me to see a man act so womanish. Well, the fur 
fairly fievv^ as they say, and there was a lively scene 


82 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

for an hour or so. That woman was not the tender- 
hearted creature you might imagine from seeing her 
in a tranquil state of mind. She had been warned 
the women lecturers and woman’s papers not to 
weaken at such a point, and she didn’t. 

“Not much will I get the dinher,” she replied. 
“You just pitch in now, Sam Gregoiy, and get us 
our dinner ; do you think I am going to conduct the 
duties of my office and then help you out with your 
house work? Not much, Mr. Gregoiw ; you will 
have to do your work, and if you don’t know how, 
you can learn.” 

It was a stormy scene, the biggest domestic jar I 
had ever witnessed. The poor man made a brave 
stand and fought desperately to defend himself, but 
the new woman carried the day and Sam Gregory- 
had to get the dinner. Benjamin was very uneasy 
and wanted me to roll up my sleeves and get the din- 
ner myself, but I told him to keep mum and we would 
see how the struggle resulted, for that was just what 
I was looking for — a genuine experience. 

We were finally seated at the table, and Mrs. Greg- 
ory told her husband she was very sony he had acted 
so before me, for I was traveling to learn the beauties 
and advantages of the new woman. 

Mr. Gregory ventured to say that he hoped I would 
see them as they were, and if I saw them as he had, 
I would see mighty little beauty and a heap of disad- 
vantages in the new woman. He said he had wished 
a thousand times that lightning had struck that Miss 
Mary Reformer, Susan Gougeher, Helen Thunder-. 


WE ENCOUNTlCRl^l) A DOMESTIC CVCEONl 




We were finally seated at the table. — Page 82. 



VVE ENCOUNTERED A DOMESTIC CYCLONE 


clap and a hundred more such agitators and disturbers 
of domestic serenity before they had ever struck that 
neighborhood and set all the women crazy over a 
fancied emancipation, but what was in reality a con- 
founded humbuggery, and would, if not checked right 
speedily, result in the utter disruption of the family 
circle. 

“That’s enough of such talk, Sam Gregory,” said 
Mrs. G. ; “you ought to be ashamed of yourself to 
speak so disrespectfully of those sainted women who 
have stood up so nobly for the cause of their down- 
trodden sisters. This new woman business is all a 
mistake ; woman has never been obedient, she has 
always had the germ of rule in her soul. In the good 
old Bible times man harkened unto the voice of his 
wife and also obeyed God and the angels. It is only 
the ‘old woman’ asserting her long outraged rights; 
man has had a long inning, it is true, and he may 
have first gained his position by his physical strength, 
but muscle will not avail him now. Brains are ruling 
and governing this country to-day, and as the women 
are devoting more time to the cultivation of their 
minds than the men are, we. can reasonably expect 
nothing more nor less than this change in the long 
established program. Since we have secured equal 
suffrage we have gained a great advantage, and now 
all we have to do is to see to it that we don’t lose 
what we have gained. Yes, woman is on the rise; 
the sun of her new hopes and opportunities is just 
mounting the heaven of her deliverance, and this new 
order of things will continue to grow and work out its 


86 BETSEY JANE ON ITIE NEW WOMAN 

blessed results until the ocean of eternity shall sweep 
the island of Man into oblivion.” 

This oratorical flight of Mrs. Gregory had the effect 
of silencing Mr. G., who turned his attention to feed- 
ing the baby. Benjamin was convinced by her well 
worded and forcibly delivered argument, and said 
that that was just what he thought about it, and he 
hoped that the women w6uld not weaken in the cause, 
but I am not the kind of a person Benjamin is by any 
means, and am not so easily persuaded or subdued, 
and I warned Benjamin to hold his tongue and remem- 
ber his experience at Northampton. 

“Life,” said I, “is a two-fold affair, and there 
should be no rivalry between husband and wife ; if 
the men are not what the women would have them 
be, it is within their power, and their privilege and 
duty, to elevate them to the plane they would have 
them occupy. A woman’s attractions and wiles can 
accomplish anything they set out to do. It is not a 
very wise woman who can’t wind a man around her 
Anger, so to speak, and I know from personal expe- 
rience and much observation that the best way to 
handle a man is to coax and lead him, not drive him ; 
molasses will always catch more flies than vinegar. 
But I agree with you, Mrs. Gregory, that women are 
being cultivated far more than are the men ; with this 
I have no fault to find, for womanly culture is the in- 
fluence that keeps life elevated and pure, but they 
should not forget that they are liable to get themselves 
cultivated so far in advance of the men that they wil 
feel lonesome.” 


WE ENCOUNTERED A DOMESTIC CYCLONE 87 

When I had finished, Mr. Gregory was the first to 
speak ; he said that was just what he thought ; he be- 
lieved every word of it. Mrs. G. cast a withering 
look on him and he wilted, and again turned his at- 
tention to stuffing the baby, who evidently was satis- 
fied with what it had already had, and was trying to 
get its feet into the plate. 

‘‘Woman was cultivated and developed into the 
most fascinating of beings in Egypt fifteen hundred 
years before Christ,” said Mrs. Gregory, “but with 
all her charms and winning ways she has been en- 
slaved and downtrodden by the monster, man ; we are 
tired of coaxing and coquetting the men ; nearly four 
thousand years of experience in that line has convinced 
us that we women should be something more than 
lovable, weak and winning, if we would have our 
rights. I am heart and soul in sympathy with the 
old woman, or, as most people call it, the new woman 
movement.” 

“I have always been very fond of the model wom- 
an,” said I. “Woman is doing enough for the world 
by simply being a woman ; she should be filled with 
an aspiration to be a model woman, and should strive 
to approach that ideal which all the world loves. A 
model woman is a noble creature, and by her feminine 
nature and womanly attributes she has, ever since 
the civilization of the world, commanded the respect, 
admiration and love of men ; not because she rivaled 
him in his positions, but simply because she was femi- 
nine nnd womanly. I am afraid that the new woman 
Ig doing a great cjetal of harin by robbing the girls of 


88 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

their charms and winning qualities, which alone have, 
and always will, draw men unto them and virtually 
make them their willing and unconscious slaves.” 

‘‘Yes, woman is a noble creature,” said Mrs. Gre^ 
ory, “but my idea of a model woman is different from 
yours. How about the model man ? Dicl you ever 
see a model man, Mrs. Jones?” 

“Yes,” said I. “I have seen plenty of them; man, 
too, is a noble creature, but the qualities that make a 
man noble are just the opposite of those that make a 
woman noble. Man in his masculine and sturdy quali- 
ties has commanded the admiration and love of the 
opposite sex for centuries, but how will it be when 
the ones he has loved and protected, mount the pin- 
nacle of their aspirations and look down on him from 
every profession and commercial height? Is not the 
world already full of doubt as to whether or not mar- 
riage is a failure?” 

Mr. Gregory said there was no doubt about it in 
his mind, as we pushed back from the table. Mrs. 
Gregory bestowed upon her partner another of those 
awful withering looks, which is the principal weapon 
of the new woman, and I pitied that man from the 
bottom of my heart. 

Mrs. G. gave her husband a few hasty instructions 
about the house work, told the hired man that she 
wanted him to plow deeper and closer to the corn, 
and after instructing us in regard to the road to our 
next objective point, bid us good-bye and started out 
to pursue her duties as boss of road construction. She 
said if we returned home over that road we would 


WK ENCOUNTERED A DOMESTIC CYCLONE^ 89 

lind it much smoother and more agreeable to travel. 

As we rode down the lane and left the Gregory 
family to settle their slight dilliculties, Benjamin re- 
marked that he pitied that man himself, and if he were 
in his place he would not submit to such indignities. 
I toM him to save his sympathies for Mrs. Gregory, 
as he had said he believed just as she did. 

“Well, I am in sympathy with the women,” said 
he, “but I’ll be darned if I would take a back seat 
for any woman on making good roads when I was 
pathmaster in our district You know, yourself, Bet- 
sey, that there wasn’t any better roads nowhere than 
1 put up when I was in the business.” 

“There now, Benjamin, that’s just like you,” said 
I. “Guess it’s the same with everybody; you don’t 
mind it as long as the women don’t cross your path, 
do something that you have done or want to do, but 
when they come in competition with you and your 
business you object just as quick as anybody.” 

“I never run a hotel and never want to, but I object 
to the women running them,” said Benjamin. 


CHAPTER Vli. 

MALE OR FEMALE ? WHAT WAS IT ? 

The afternoon was not more than half gone when 
we wheeled into the city of Worcester. It was a 
beautiful city of about 85,000 people, situated on the 
Blackstone River, and contained extensive manufac- 
tories of nearly all kinds, colleges, churches, asylums, 
and in fact everything that goes to make up a pro- 
gressive and thrifty city. I decided that it would be a 
fruitful field in which to prosecute my investigations, 
and told Benjamin that we would stop there for a time. 
He was very shy of hotels that were conducted by 
women, but as the men had all gone out of the hotel 
business and there was no alternative we registered at 
a modest, second-class house, after looking them all 
over. 

After depositing our wheels and ridding our faces 
and hands of the soil we had collected from the stony 
but dusty roads, we cast about for something to amuse 
ourselves until supper time. Directly across the road 
from our hotel was a large brick building, and from 
the most conspicuous sign on its walls we saw that 
the structure housed the office of the “Worcester Re- 
former,” and we decided to go over and call on the 
editor, see what kind of a man he was, tell him all 
about our travel, our object and experiences up to 
date, and get our names in his paper. 

90 


MALE OR FEMALE? WHAT WAS IT? 9 1 

“We will buy some papers,” said Benjamin, ‘‘that 
contain the account of us and send them back home to 
the children and our friends. Wonder if he won’t 
want our pictures to put in to help set the article off ? 
Come, Betsey, let’s go first and set for a picture ; then 
if he mentions it we can accommodate him without 
delay.” 

“ Don’t be in too much of a hurry about the pictures,” 
said I, “wait and see what sort of a fellow he is. 
Some editors are cranky and don’t like to be bored 
by tourists; we will act like we didn’t care a cent 
whether he noticed us or not and he will be all the 
more liable to become interested in us. But, Ben- 
jamin, you must remember and be polite ; don’t ask 
the editor how man}^ subscribers he has for his paper ; 
I have heard that that always makes newspaper men 
angry. Don’t ask more than two questions at one time 
and don’t bother the employes of the office by visiting 
with them, for the business manager thinks the office 
is entitled to their time, as they have to cash up for it 
every Saturday night. Don’t read the proof sheets 
nor the copy on the hooks or cases ; they are always 
touchy about that in newspaper offices.” 

When I thought I had mentioned everything that^ 
Benjamin was liable to do that he ought not to do, we 
proceeded to climb the long flight of stairs leading to 
the office. I knew that we were on the right road, for 
on every other riser was a big green card on which was 
printed, “Reformer Office,” and at the end of a long 
hall, down which we passed after arriving at the top 
of the stairs, was a door on which was tacked one of 


92 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


these cards. We took this to be the door which led 
into the Reformer office, and ventured to enter without 
inquiring of any one if the card was on the proper door. 

Stepping up to the door I gave three dainty little 
knocks, and a gruff voice within cried out, “Come." 
1 started to open the door, when Benjamin grabbed mj' 
arm. '‘Stop,” said he, ‘'don’t open that door and 
walk in that way; he would think we didn’t know any 
manners.” 

‘‘But he said ‘come’,” said I, “and I am coming.” 

“Don’t mean for us to come,” said Benjamin, 
“means that he is coming to open the door himself.” 

After waiting about five minutes and seeing no 
change in the condition of our surroundings, I ven- 
tured to knock again, this time a little harder, and the 
same gruff voice said, ‘‘Come.” I was certain that the 
editor meant for us to come in, and I wanted to go, 
but Benjamin would not allow it. Said he would 
rather miss seeing the editor than make a fool of our- 
selves. We waited another five minutes, and as nothing 
turned up, I decided to try the raps once more before 
going away. This time I pounded with more force 
than before, and immediately the demand, “Come in, 
come in,” rang out sharp and shrill. I waited no longer, 
but opened the door and stepped right in, followed 
closely by Benjamin. 

It was a large square room, about twenty feet each 
way, 1 should judge ; the walls were decorated with 
the familiar faces of Mrs. Helen M. Gougar, Mrs. 
Clara Hoffman, Mrs. Mary Lease, Miss Frances E. 
Willard, Miss Susan B. Anthony and several other 


MALE OR FEMALE? WHAT WAS IT? 


93 


noted woman’s rights agitators. The pictures were 
nearly all life-size, mounted in large, tine frames, and 
true likenesses of the ladies. There were no pictures 
of men and I thought it rather queer at the time. 
There was a large table or desk at the further side of 
the room, and seated behind it was the editor, with 
his hair rather long for a man and parted in the mid- 
dle ; several pens and pencils were stored away on top 
of his ears and he wore eyeglasses. I stepped up and 
said, “ How do you do, sir? Are you the editor?” 

“I am the editor,” he said, what can I do for you ?” 

“We are strangers in your city,” said Benjamin, . 
“and have been informed by your citizens that you 
are one of the most pleasant and agreeable men in 
Worcester to meet, and we came up to see you and 
3^our office and get acquainted.” What on earth ever 
made Benjamin venture to tell that lie I couldn’t im- 
agine. He afterward told me that he wanted to sa\^ 
something and thought he would break the ice with a 
little flatter3\ 

The editor dropped its pen and rose to its full height 
as Benjamin ended his sentence. It was clad in a man’s 
coat, vest and shirt and wore a man’s neck-gear, but 
when it stood up I could see that it wore bloomers, 
and I also noticed that its features were a little soft 
for a man’s, and its hands were small, with long, slim 
fingers, but I was still undecided as to whether it was 
of the masculine, feminine or neuter gender. It 
stretched its long, lank form up at least a foot above 
us, and pointing its slender index finger at Benjamin 
and assuming a look that would have crushed the 


94 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


cobblestones in the street below, it said in a very 
withering tone : 

‘‘So you have come up here to insult me, have you, 
you nasty man ? Get out at once, or I will call the 
police and have you put out and locked up where you 
won’t have a chance to insult innocent and unprotected 
women.” 

I saw that Benjamin was too much frightened to 
explain his actions and that something must be done 
at once, so summoning all my powers and courage, I 
told the editor to be calm and explain how Benjamin 
had insulted any one, and we would then try and ex- 
plain and defend ourselves. 

“Well, I am no man, and I want you to understand 
it too,” she said. “The meanest thing I was ever 
accused of was being a man, and I won’t stand it any 
longer. Only this morning a bum printer came blun- 
dering in here and called me Mister. It makes me 
mad, and I won’t stand it any longer.” 

“Then you are a woman, I suppose,” said I. “Why 
don’t you wear a sign so people can tell by reading 
it that you are a woman ?” 

“ If I really thought that I looked like a maul 
would have the word woman painted right across my 
forehead,” said she. 

Benjamin had caught his breath by this time and he 
informed the lady that when she sat down behind the 
desk, where he couldn’t see her bloomers, he thouo'ht 
she looked more like a man than a woman. 

“I may look to you somewhat like a man, but I 
never act like one,” she said. 


MALE OR FEMALE ? WHAT WAS IT ? 


95 



“So you have come up here to insult me, have you, you nasty man?” 
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MALE OR FEMALE? WHAT WAS IT? 


97 

‘‘ Wherein do you differ in your actions from the 
men?'’ inquired Benjamin. 

“Weil, sir,” said she, “I never swear, chew or 
smoke tobacco, drink whisky or beer, sit on dry goods 
boxes and whittle and run the town down, nor tell my 
wife that I am going down-town to meet a man and 
then spend half the night at the club or saloon.” 

Benjamin agreed with her that the things she didn’t 
do were very commendable, and she invited us to be 
seated. I then explained that Benjamin was my hus- 
band, and that we were traveling through the country 
on our wheels to afford me an opportunity to meet 
with all the different and actual phases of the new 
woman, with the view to writing a book about them. 
She was at once interested in us and cheerfully volun- 
teered any service she could render me. I told her I 
thought she looked like a new woman from what I 
had seen of them, and an account of herself and her 
doings might be of great benefit to me. She seemed 
delighted, and I felt confident that I had struck her 
weak spot, for she broke loose and talked for about 
an hour at a lightning-like speed. I thought she was 
some sort of a machine that had been wound up, and 
wondered how long she would run. I tried to inter- 
rupt her several times with questions and arguments,, 
but it was useless to try to get a word in ; she was 
wound up, and since I had touched the button and set 
her going, all I could do was to wait until she had run 
down. She told us how she had raised up from ob- 
scurity by her own indomitable will and efforts, and 
having a burning desire to assist in the emancipation 


98 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

of her sex she had established the Reformer. It was 
a weekly paper and published all the city and county 
gossip, besides carrying a regular load of woman’s 
rights, or new woman literature. In fact, it was de- 
voted to the new woman and her cause, and to the 
destruction of the men. 

From looking over a few back numbers of the Re- 
former that lay on the table, I noticed that the men 
were handled without gloves, as they say, while the 
women were pictured as angels, without wings, who 
were being persecuted by the men beyond all human 
endurance. Even the outrages committed on the help- 
less Armenians by the murderous Turks, were at- 
tributed to the men and men’s rule. I asked Miss 
Ophelia Dunbar — that was her name — why it was the 
men patronized her paper. “They don’t patronize 
me very much,” said she, “but that don’t cut any fig- 
ure, for their wives and daughters are learning to run 
the ranches and what they say goes, and you may rest 
assured that every woman in Worcester and vicinity 
are cash-in-advance subscribers to the Reformer.” 

“What about the advertising patronage ?” I said. “I 
see you have plenty of patronage in that line. I should 
think that the business men would boycott your paper. ” 

“Business men!” said she, “there are no business 
men in the city to speak of ; the business of Worcester, 
I am happy to say, is all conducted by women, noble 
women, who have the grit and nerve to do and dare 
for themselves.” 

“What do the men do?” I asked. 

“Well, the married men take care of the brats and 


MALE OR FEMALE? WHAT WAS IT? 


99 


do the house work, and those who are not fortunate 
enough to have a wife are looking for one to support 
them.” 

I said I guessed if things kept on in this way much 
longer, all there would be left for a man to do would 
be to get married and let his wife support him. 

Miss Dunbar said she thought that was all the lazy 
things cared about a woman for, but if any of them 
were waiting for her to take him and support him he 
would have to have a mighty good constitution to 
stand the wait, for she had long since concluded to go 
it single-handed, didn’t want to be bothered with a 
man and a lot of squalling brats, as she was pleased 
to call children. Benjamin said he didn’t think she 
needed to worry, for no man would ever take advan- 
tage of her and marry her while she was asleep. 

At this remark she flew into a rage, and a war of 
words ensued between the great emancipator and 
Benjamin. She said she would have him to under- 
stand that she did not pretend to be a Cleopatra and 
wouldn’t give a cent for a woman who staked her 
reputation on her beauty, and at the same time in- 
formed Benjamin that he would never be mistaken for 
an Adonis. Benjamin said bethought she could play 
the role of a Jezebel to perfection, which only in- 
creased her anger and caused several additional 
wrinkles to appear in her face and her eyebrows to 
turn and stick straight toward her long, sharp nose. I 
saw that Benjamin was holding his ground pretty well 
and thought I would let him have a taste of the new 
woman whom he had imagined he fancied so well, 


lOO BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

and I occupied my time looking over some of the 
papers in the big pile of exchanges that were piled up 
on the floor at the end of the table. I found dozens 
of women's journals, devoted to the wants and aspira- 
tions of women alone; every magazine and familj" 
paper or newspaper contained lengthy articles about 
women, written by women, besides their regular and 
special features — “Woman’s Corner,” “Woman To- 
day,” “Woman To-morrow,” “ A Chat with Women,” 
etc., etc., and I also noticed the same characteristics 
in every one of the hundreds of different papers I 
chanced to pick up on our trip. 

Finally Benjamin and Miss Dunbar show^ed signs 
of weakening, as there was a lull in their conversation, 
of which I took advantage, and said I thought we ought 
to pay more attention to the men. “I see,” said I, 
“everything is running to w^omen. Look at those 
papers, and they are only samples, and see how eveiy 
paper and periodical is devoted, either entirely or 
in part, to women. What we need is a man’s journal 
to advocate his cause and prevent him from being en- 
tirely lost sight of in this great struggle for social, 
professional and commercial supremacy.” 

“Well, I must confess,” said the new woman, “you 
are right. Everything is coming our way, and at the 
present rate of progress it won’t be many years before 
we will be masters of the situation, and the horrid men 
will awake, but too late, to And themselves outstripped 
and relegated to the rear by their fair sisters. Yes, 
we realize that the pen is mightier than the sword, 
and with its free and liberal iise we are working won- 


MALE OR FEMALE? WHAT WAS IT? lOI 

ders for our sex. Our young ladies are readers and 
they improve their minds, while the young men spend 
their time loafing on the street corners, or running to 
all sorts of games, hunting, fishing and many other 
frivolous things. If they had applied themselves to 
reading and study they would not now be on the verge 
of oblivion.” 

'‘But what are * you going to do with the young 
men?” I asked. 

“We need a few strong, healthy young men to keep 
the streets clean, work in the fields and shops and do 
other distasteful and heavy work, and the more ad- 
venturous can employ their time in war, if we should 
need them there, and in discovering and exploring new 
countries, but they must keep out of the professions, 
the stores and offices where women can do the work ; 
in fact, they must do just what we women don’t care 
to do, and no more.” 

“But how are the men going to be able to support 
families if the girls and women are to displace them 
in so many ways as you suggest?” 

“ Let the lazy things get out of the offices and stores 
and take the places of thousands of young women who 
are slaving in the factories,” said she, and at the same 
time pointing out of the window in the direction of a 
cluster of large buildings where at least hundreds of 
women were actually sacrificing their lives every day 
by hard and incessant toil. 

“But no man could maintain a family on the wages 
that are paid those women,” I said. 

“Oh, we will fix that all right when we get the 


102 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


offices ; wait till we get our representatives in full force 
at Washington; it won’t take long to frame and pass 
laws that will secure to the laboring classes a fair 
compensation for her or his day’s work.” 

Supper time had arrived, and the editress invited us 
to call again next morning and resume our interview. 
I knew that was a polite way of asking us to get out. 
and so started to go. She said if I ever did write a 
book on the new woman she hoped I would give them 
a fair deal. I assured her that I would do nothing 
else, and bid her good-evening, and good-bye, for we 
did not call again. 


CHAPTER VIII. 


THE NEW WOMAN BAND A FAILURE. 

After supper the Worcester Cornet Band — com- 
posed entirely of young ladies — gave an open air con- 
cert at the intersection of the two principal streets of 
the city, and we could see and hear them from our 
hotel, which was very convenient. The landlady in- 
formed us that it was the best band in the state, the 
women of Worcester thought so ; but I had grave 
doubts about the truth of the statement. 

Although there were thirty pieces in the band and 
the performers were all dressed in the finest of uni- 
forms, there was something lacking, which a blind 
devotion to the new woman could not cover up in my 
estimation. The girl who beat the bass drum was a 
slender little midget, and no more fit to perform such 
a part than I am calculated to wear a long train and 
lead the march in the opening of a fashionable ball, 
while the lovely creature who played the tattoo on the 
snare drum was more masculine than feminine. She 
would weigh at least two hundred, and had an arm 
that was better adapted to wielding a sledge hammer 
than the dainty little sticks with which she beat that 
innocent little drum. I also noticed that equally as 
bad taste had been displayed in placing other members 
of the band as in the two drummers, and I called my 
friend’s attention to the fact, which she admitted, but 
103 


104 BETSEY JANE ON TIIP: NEW WOMAN 

said that it could not be helped, for the girls had idl 
selected their positions before the band was organized 
and their instructor could not induce them to change. 
I remarked that it was unfortunate for the welfare of 
the band that they should act so, and inquired if no 
two of the angelic creatures had chosen the same in- 
strument. The landlady threw up her hands and said, 
“Lord bless you, yes, but what could we do? Noth- 
ing but let them settle it among themselves.” 

“Well, how did they settle it?” I inquired. 

“They settled it just as our revolutionary fathers 
settled their little difficulty with the mother country, 
by brute force.” 

“What, those girls settle their choice of positions 
by brute force?” said I. 

“Yes, indeed,” said mine hostess, “you ought to 
have been here the night they organized, if you enjoy 
seeing a circus. They held their first meeting here 
at my house, and it was an occasion long to be remem- 
bered too. I shall never forget it myself, for it cost 
me nearly a hundred dollars to repair and replace the 
broken furniture. You have noticed and mentioned 
about the one that performs on the little drum. Well, 
about half the girls wanted to play that instrument, but 
the one who has it now wanted it also, and as she was 
the most powerful of them all, she succeeded in getting 
it and holding on to it ; but it was a hard struggle, 
the other girls wanted it very badly, and the professor 
said she was not by nature fitted to perform upon such 
a delicate instrument and advised her to take the big 
bass drum. This only served to madden her, and the 


THE NEW WOMAN BAND A FAILURE 


lOS 





‘That big, stout girl don’t handle the drumsticks a bit graceful and 
never will.” — Page 107, 



THE NEW WOMAN BAND A FAILURE 


107 


v/ar waged fiercer than ever. The outcome of the 
matter was the triumph of the big, burly girl over all 
her weaker and less masculine sisters. When it was 
thoroughly demonstrated that Miss Corbet had the 
snare drum by right of conquest, there was a rush for 
the next most desirable instruments and all the Wild 
West scenes were re-enacted. After another hour of 
struggling, slugging and hair-pulling the positions 
were all settled, with the weakest and smallest of them 
all to carry that monster of a big drum around and 
swing those big, heavy clubs that would tire the big- 
gest blacksmith in the country. It is too bad it was 
settled in that way, but there was no other way to 
do it ; the girls were all brought up to have their own 
way, you know.” 

‘‘Yes, it is too bad,” said I. “I can see that that 
is the fault with their music. That big, stout girl don't 
handle the drumsticks a bit graceful and never will, 
while the poor little thing with the big drum can’t hit 
it half hard or fast enough. Then there is the one 
with the tuby, she hasn’t lung capacity or power 
enough to blow a pumpkin vine, and so it is all the 
way through the whole list ; none of the performers 
are fitted to fill the positions assigned them.” 

While we were talking the band struck up and at- 
tempted to play “The Red, White and Blue,” which 
was more appropriate than beautiful, as those who 
were blowing the wind instruments turned red, and 
all “blue” with all the strength they possessed, while 
the poor little bass drummer turned white and seemed 
ready to faint from her superhuman exertions. I do 


Io8 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

not profess to know anything about music, but know 
that the selection was poorly rendered. The hundreds 
of new women on the streets, however, applauded 
vociferously and appeared to think it the finest music 
they ever heard. 

1 had heard enough to satisfy me, but Benjamin was 
not so easily discouraged on this occasion, for he had 
secured a comfortable position near the first cornetist, 
and was busily engaged in holding a torchlight for 
her special edification ; she, like the rest of the zoo- 
logical collection, was better fitted for something else 
than the position she now occupied. 

She was short and fleshy, with lips which were more 
noticeable for their extreme thickness than for their 
rosiness, and when she played, her cheeks assumed 
the proportions of a toy balloon, and her face turned 
to a brilliant scarlet ; the way she squeaked on the 
upper notes and slid around on some of the difflcult 
runs, was enough to endear her to the heart of an old- 
fashioned drum major. 

I retired to rest with the unshaken belief that the 
new woman was not a success as a street musician. 

The band kept up its discordant din for more than 
an hour, and then all was still, and I began to look for 
Benjamin, but strange to relate, he did not appear, 
and it was in vain I listened for his footsteps. Time 
dragged slowly on and I had about made up my mind 
that something had happened to him, and that it would 
be well for me to rise and look into the matter, but 
about the time 1 had reached this conclusion I heard 
stealthy footsteps in the hall outside my door, and 


THE NEW WOMAN BAND A FAILURE 


109 


then a hand was laid on the door latch and the door 
swung softly open. I closed my eyes, as if in deep 
sleep, but took the precaution to leave one partly 
open. I did not forget my ancient habit of snoring, 
and as the light was burning, 1 had the satisfaction of 
seeing my dear Benjamin gliding into the room, car- 
rying his shoes in his hand, his face wearing an anx- 
ious expression and sundry strips of court plaster, 
which did much to embellish his refined and intellect- 
ual features. I kept right on with my snoring, which 
was a decided improvement on the Worcester New 
Woman Band, and continued to watch Benjamin. He 
deposited his ferryboats very carefully in one corner 
of the room and then proceeded to disrobe, but with 
more than his accustomed care, and for some reason, 
unusual silence. I exerted all my powers of self-con- 
trol, although a desire to laugh took such forcible 
possession of me that I feared I would be unable to 
keep silent. Benjamin continued to cast furtive glances 
in the direction of the bed until all his preparations 
for retiring were completed and he had turned to ex- 
tinguish the light, when I spoke and said: ‘‘Benja- 
min Jones, where on earth have you been and what 
have you been doing?” 

He could not have been more startled if a streak of 
lightning had landed in the middle of the room. 

“Eh — what’s that ?” he squeaked. “ Are you awake, 
Betsey ?” 

“Yes, I am awake,” I said savagely, for Benjamin’s 
scared and guilty looks confirmed me in my suspicions 
that he had not been behaving himself, 1 continued: 


i lO B£TSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

‘4 want to know where you have been and what you 
have been doing, and why you didn’t come to this 
room more than an hour ago.” 

He turned and stared at me with a sort of hopeless 
and helpless expression on his ashen countenance, and 
managed to ejaculate: ‘‘Why, Betsey, I came in just 
as soon as the band quit playing.” 

I raised up in bed, and glaring wickedly at my de- 
fenseless partner, who did not have Walter to en- 
courage him now, I said: “Benjamin Jones, what 
an awful liar you are getting to be ! That band quit 
making night hideous more than an hour ago, and you 
can’t fool me with any of your fairy tales, and the 
quicker you realize that fact and confess the truth, 
the better it will be for you.” 

Benjamin seated himself on a chair with a very de- 
jected look and said: “Well, Betsey, I suppose that 
I might as well own up to the truth first as last, for I 
know you will never let me have any peace until I do. 
The handsome young lad}^ who played the first cornet 
told me that she lived in the suburbs, and that she was 
afraid to go home alone when it was so late, and asked 
me if 1 wouldn’t be so kind as to accompany her.” 

“And I suppose you are obliged to go tramping off 
in the countiy with every strange female who asks 
you to go, are 3 ^ou?'’ I asked sarcasticalty. 

“I suppose not, but it wouldn’t have been very 
polite to refuse a good looking girl like her,” said 
Benjamin. 

“ Good looking I shrieked, as I jumped out of 
bed. “Benjamin Jones, don’t let me hear you allude 


THE NEW WOMAN BAND A FAILURE 


III 


to that horrid female as good looking again, unless 
3^011 want trouble. Things have come to a pretty 
pass when an old man like you has got to go tramping 
off with strange and loud women in the middle of the 
night, and leave me, your helpless wife, alone in a 
strange house miles from home.” I commenced to cry. 
I was so mad that I couldn't help it. Just to hear him 
speak of that creature as good looking, fairly made 
my blood boil. 

Benjamin was frightened and again tried to explain 
just how it all happened, but I would not listen and 
only told him that we would leave Worcester before 
daylight the next morning, as it was the rockiest place 
that I had ever visited. Benjamin remarked that it 
beat Northampton and the Transient House all to 
pieces, as he had anything but a pleasant time in that 
place. 

“Pretty people, nice folks, those women are! In 
spite of their boasted independence it seems that the 
new woman can’t get along without the old man,” I 
continued. 

“That’s so,” said Benjamin, “and I am mighty 
glad of it, for it is a pleasure to me to wait upon the 
ladies.” 

I promised him that he should have an opportunit}' 
to wait upon me to his heart’s content, since he en- 
joyed such employment so well, but he was a little 
more discreet in his actions after that evening. 


CHAPTER IX. 


THE NEW WOMAN FIRE-FIGHTERS. 

I WAS awakened the next morning by the blowing 
of whistles, ringing of bells and shouts of a large 
crowd of people who had gathered in the street 
directly under our room. I was frightened and shook 
Benjamin, who was snoring away at a race horse 
pace, and told him to get up and get into his clothes 
at once, for we were already surrounded by new women 
who thirsted for our life-blood. 

“Dum the wo’bemen,” said he. ‘‘Let them come; 
I will sell my life as dearly as possible, and they will 
find me no easy prey.” 

Having made a more accurate surve}’ of the situa- 
tion, I discovered that the large hotel directly across 
the street from ours was on fire, which accounted for 
all the din and confusion that had so frightened me. 

I had never witnessed a big fire in a large city and 
was glad of the opportunity, not that I delighted to 
see the wanton destruction of property, and possibly 
the loss of human lives, but since there was a confla- 
gration in the city I was pleased to be permitted to 
occupy such an advantageous position, where I could 
see and learn all about how the firemen handled them- 
selves in fighting the flames. 

Two fire companies, with steam engines, had al- 
ready arrived and taken up their positions in the street, 
II2 


THE NEW WOMAN FIRE-FIGHTERS II3 

and more were coming up and being assigned places 
by the captain of the fire department, who, by the way, 
was a woman, although you couldn’t discern her sex 
by her dress unless you noticed her bloomers. She 
was attired in the full uniform of the regulation fire- 
man, as were all her assistants, who proved to be 
women also. 

I had opened our door and inquired of one of the 
chambermaids who happened to be passing down the 
hall, if there was any danger of our hotel catching fire 
from the burning building. She assured me that there 
was no danger, as they had an excellent fire depart- 
ment that would make short work of that little blaze, 
and upon my invitation she came into our room and 
took a seat by my side at the window. 

The smoke was issuing from every opening in the 
building and sheets of flame were leaping from many 
of the windows ; but the women seemed to be per- 
fectly cool and collected. They proceeded to unreel 
the hose, couple and lay it with the greatest of care ; 
the engines were changed several times in an endeavor 
to get everything in the most perfect and systematic 
order. The large crowd of men and boys who lined 
up on our side of the street began to shout to the new 
woman fire companies to get a hustle on them or the 
building would be falling in before they got water. 
“Reel off your hose,” “ Hustle that coupling,” “Raise 
your ladders,” “Turn on your water,” and many such 
derisive expressions were shouted at the women from 
the men and boys. 

At last everything seerned to be in readiness and 


1 14 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

the captain gave the order to turn on the water. Half 
a dozen lines of hose extended from the engines on 
our side of the street, and each was supported by a 
woman who stood in the middle of the street and 
pointed the nozzle up at the windows on the top floors. 
At the word of command the engines were all started 
simultaneously, and as the water rushed out into the 
long hose, under the great pressure from the big 
engines, they quickly assumed a cylinder form and 
the kinks were all straightened out in a jiffy; but the 
climax was reached when the water arrived at the 
nozzles and was restrained in its flow by the small 
openings, which caused' the hose to flop and jump 
around like a big snake with its head off. 

Although it was impossible for them to stand to 
their posts, they showed their bravery by clinging to 
the nozzles and performing all sorts of acrobatic feats. 
They were all thrown from their feet in an instant and 
rolled over and over in the street, which was soon 
flooded with the water that squirted from the nozzles 
in every conceivable direction and completely drenched 
everybody who happened to be within a block of the 
scene. This greatly pleased the boys, who did not 
mind getting wet themselves and only cheered and 
shouted to the women to — “Hang on there, old girl,” 
“Grab that hose,” “Squirt your water on the fire,” 
etc., etc. 

The captain, who had managed to keep her feet 
and head during the exciting scene, was convinced 
that they could do no effective service from the ground 
and so ordered the engines stopped after the deck had 


THE NEW WOMAN FIRE-EIGHTERS 


115 



V 


They were all thrown from their feet in an instant and rolled over and over 
in the street — Page 114. 


THE NEW WOMAN FIRE-FIGHTERS 1 1 7 

been washed and cleared. As soon as the unruly lines 
of hose had ceased to ’flop and the tirewomen had 
picked themselves up, the ladders were ordered to be 
raised, which was done without accident, although not 
so dexterously as they might have been, and two fire- 
women were ordered to take one nozzle and together 
ascend the ladders and direct the stream^s into the 
windows. This order they were very reluctant to 
obey, and it was only by the use of the pole-hooks in 
the hands of the captain and lieutenants that they 
were induced to go more than ten feet up the ladders, 
and as soon as they were up above the reach of the 
poles they stopped. Nothing could induce them to 
risk their precious necks by getting far from mother 
earth, now that the seats of their bloomers were no 
longer liable to punctures from the prod-poles. Ac- 
cordingly they were ordered to . turn their nozzles in 
such a shape as to throw the streams into the second 
story windows, and the engines were started the second 
time. The water came with as much force as before, 
but the women were prepared for a struggle, and with 
two holding each nozzle as firmly as possible, they 
managed to keep their positions and direct the water 
into the burning building for a few moments, and 
Benjamin shouted: “Bravo! bravo! now they will 
win.” I told him he had better wait a few minutes 
and see how they held out. It was not long until the 
smoke and steam began pouring out into, their faces, 
and they couldn’t stand fire, as the old soldiers say, 
and began to drop from the ladders. 

Everything was now in a state of the wildest excite- 


Il8 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

ment ; more than a dozen women were severely in- 
jured and the whole force of the new woman tire 
department thoroughly demoralized ; the fire was 
burning fiercely, the hose all turned loose and half a 
dozen streams of water squirting in every direction. 
The captain had been knocked down by a falling lad- 
der, and the other officers of the several companies 
were so demoralized and frightened that they didn’t 
know whether they were dead or alive. I was as 
much excited as anybody, but had my senses and could 
see that it was a desperate occasion and desperate 
means must be employed. So leaning far out of my 
window and holding on to one of Benjamin’s hands 
with my left hand, I waved my right hand and shouted 
to the men below me at the top of my voice: “Lay 
hold there, you men, and man those nozzles and en- 
gines.” At this command thirt}^ or forty nimble men 
sprang forward and were soon at the tops of the lad- 
ders and fighting the fire in a manful and business-like 
manner. 

I expressed surprise at the promptness m which my 
order had been obeyed, but the chamber maid informed 
me that I had undoubtedly been mistaken for the 
mayor of the city, who was a woman and resembled 
me ver}^ much in looks, and the men who were now 
fighting the fire so successfully were the old city fire- 
men who had recently been discharged and their places 
filled by the women. Encouraged by what I had done, 
I ventured another step. The women were lying 
drenched, bleeding and wounded in the street, and 
those wlm could stand were wringing their hands and 


THE NEW WOMAN FIRE-FIGHTERS 


II9 




I now recognized, for the first time, the captain as Miss Dunbar, 
the editress of the “Reformer.” — Page 121. 





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THE NEW WOMAN FIRE-FIGIITERS 


I2I 


crying. I leaned out of the window as before and 
commanded the men who were idly standing by, to 
carry every woman on the street into the hotel which 
we were occupying. This order was obeyed as 
promptly as the first had been, and I could not help 
noticing and remarking how pleased those new women 
seemed to be to have the strong arm of a man placed 
gently about their forms and assist them to a place of 
safety and comfort. 

In less than half an hour the men had the fire under 
control, and I went below to see how the women were 
getting along and found that they had been made as 
comfortable as possible by having their wounds dressed 
and being clothed in clean and dry garments. I now 
recognized, for the first time, the captain as Miss Dun- 
bar, the editress of the “Reformer,” whom we had 
called on in her office the evening before. She had 
a bad scalp wound where a falling ladder had struck 
her head, but was not seriously hurt. I couldn’t help 
but wish that she had been in the place of a poor 
young girl who lay on a couch with a broken limb and 
bruised body, and her old father and mother weeping 
by her side and bewailing the fate that had overtaken 
their only child. 

The scene was not a pleasant one to me, so I picked 
up a copy of the last “Reformer” and the “Evening 
Post” and retired to my room, where I found Benja- 
min awaiting my return. I handed him the “Evening 
Post” and I sat down and glanced over the “ Re- 
former.” The first^thing that attracted my attention 
was a double-leaded article with a big black head as 


122 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


follows: “Our Women as Fire-Fighters.” It went 
on to state that the lazy men who had been holding 
down the chairs at the several lire stations in Wor- 
cester and doing nothing but smoke cigars, play cards 
or checkers and draw their salaries, would now have 
to hustle for a living, as the women could do the lazy 
job as well as the men, and if they were called upon 
to fight fire they would not be found wanting in cour- 
age or efficiency. The list of the officers and fire- 
women who had just been appointed by the mayor 
then followed. They had assumed their positions and 
had been personally inspected by their captain, the 
editress, and pronounced perfect. But when it came 
to actual service they had proven themselves to be 
entirely unfit for the service they had enlisted in, as 
had been thoroughly demonstrated by their first at- 
tempt to fight a fire that morning. 

Benjamin said he was convinced that the women 
were not by nature built to fight big fires, and if the 
mayor had good sense she would relegate them all to 
private life and reinstate the old firemen at once. 
“But throw that old paper out the window, Betsey, 
and let’s read the news,” said Benjamin. “Here is 
an announcement of a ball game between two lady 
clubs, to be played at the new Athletic Park in the 
suburbs of the city this afternoon, and I would like to 
go and see if the new women are any better at play- 
ing ball than at fighting fire.” 

I was anxious to see women play ball myself, and 
so we agreed that we would go out to the grounds 
and witness the game that afternoon. 


CHAPTER X. 


MORE SUCCESSFUL THAN USUAL. 

The fire had all been extinguished in the hotel build- 
ing, but not until the whole insides had been burned 
out and all the furniture destroyed. The hose had all 
been wound up and hauled off, as had the engines, and 
the streets once more presented their usual appear- 
ances. But our hotel was taxed to its fullest capacity 
to accommodate the extra business occasioned by the 
destruction which had befallen its neighboring hos- 
telry. We succeeded, however, in getting a good 
square meal, after which we looked about for a con- 
veyance to the ball grounds. We concluded that it 
would be best to leave our wheels at the hotel and 
ride out on the street cars. We had no trouble in 
finding the proper car, for those that run out to the 
Athletic Park were decorated with big white banners 
with the words, ‘‘To the Ball Park,” printed on 
them. We got into one of the cars that was labeled 
for the ball grounds and succeeded in getting seats. 
Everybody seemed to be going to the ball grounds ; 
the car that we were in was filled to overflowing at 
the first stop we made, and those who stood in the 
middle of the car surged back and forth as the car 
stopped and started, and trampled m}^ toes until I 
thought they were ground completely off. 

A woman stood directly in front of us, and Benja- 

123 


I 24 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

min rose up and asked her if she would like his seat. 
She said, “Certainly, sir,” and started to sit down, 
but Benjamin stood close to his seat and asked her if 
she was a new woman. She replied in the affirma- 
tive, when I was surprised to hear him say, “Well 
then, stand up for the new woman, for I’ll be darned 
if I am going to,” and down he sat again. The 
woman blushed and looked madder than a man who 
had bet on the wrong horse, the passengers all looked 
at Benjamin and at each other, and smiled. I also 
looked at the old fellow and said: ‘^Why, Benjamin 
Jones, what do you mean by acting in such a manner? 
If you can’t treat strangers, and especially ladies, 
civilly you had better go directly home and staj^ there. ” 
fie said he had seen enough of the new woman and 
would not take a back seat or give up a seat for anj^ 
of them. I saw that it was only making matters worse 
to argue with him in such a public place, so said no 
more about it at that time. 

We rode on for several miles through the city and 
finally arrived at the gate to the enclosure of the ball 
grounds. Joining the big crowd, we purchased our 
tickets and were allowed to pass within. I noticed 
that the ticket sellers and gate keepers, as well as the 
police officers on duty there, were all women. 

Once ipside the grounds, we began looking about 
for seats, but were soon relieved of any doubts as to 
where we had better settle ourselves by being told by 
a woman usher that we must be separated. They ex- 
pected more people than the amphitheater would hold, 
and had decided to seat all the women in it and send 


MORE SUCCESSFUL THAN USUAL 


125 



“Well then, stand up for the new woman, for I’ll be darned if I am 
going to.” — Page 124. 


« 



> 




\ 


MORK SUCCESSFUL THAN USUAL 1 27 

all the men around to the west end of the building, 
where they could sit on a rocky bank which was about 
four feet high and formed a natural amphitheater just 
at the left of the home plate and only a little outside 
of the foul line. Benjamin protested, and said he 
would stay with me or we would both go out and re- 
turn to the city together. He called their attention to 
that passage of Scripture which says: “What God 
hath joined together let not man put asunder.” The 
usher told him that she was not a man, and therefore 
that text was not applicable to the case. I saw that 
his actions were breeding trouble for him and told him 
to go on and sit with the other men, as I could easily 
get along without him. He did as I advised him, and 
in a short time we both had good seats where we 
could see each other, if we were not close together. 

After a few selections from the same horrid new 
woman band that had played on the streets near our 
hotel the evening before, the players appeared on the 
diamond dressed in gaudy colored uniforms. Their 
suits were so thoroughly padded that it was almost 
impossible for the wearers to receive an injury from 
being struck by the ball. Their faces were all pro- 
tected with wire masks which they wore all the time, 
and they all wore large padded gloves on their left 
hands, which they used to catch the ball in. 

The two umpires and captains came together near 
the home plate and held a short consultation, shook 
hands and called to the players to take their places, 
which they did after some unnecessary delay, and the 
ball was tossed by one of the umpires to the pitcher. 


128 BETSEY JANK ON THE NEW WOMAN 

The girl who occupied the pitcher’s box was very 
well built, but her muscles were not hard enough to 
enable her to deliver a ball over the plate with any 
great force. She had had lots of experience in twist- 
ing her bangs, but she made a poor out at contorting 
the ball, and it curved first to one side, then to the 
other. The umpire called ball after ball and finally 
told the lady at the bat to take her base. As she 
trotted off to first base and another girl dressed in a 
green suit picked up the bat the crowd cheered, and I 
wondered what wonderful feat had been performed that 
so pleased the people. As the game progressed the 
pitcher improved on her work and succeeded in throw- 
ing a ball occasionally that the batter could hit. Sev- 
eral of the girls succeeded in getting clear around and 
back to home base, and when it was finally announced 
that the side was out and the reds and greens changed 
positions, I heard a lady who sat near me and kept 
count on the game on a score card say that the greens 
had scored five tallies. The pitcher for the greens 
was a better hand at the business than the first one, 
but the reds were better batters than the greens, which 
evened honors up and kept the score about equal. 

It was a pretty good game, and I couldn’t help but 
acknowledge to the lady who sat by my side that the 
girls played ball nearly as well as the bo3’s. Benja- 
min was more than pleased ; I could see by his broad 
smiles and frequent applause that he was enjoying 
himself, but while I was looking over at him and he 
was looking his gayest, the girl at the bat struck the 
ball a hard blow and sent it off foul in the direction 


•. v'V N ■ // 





MORE SUCCESSFUL THAN USUAL 


I3I 



And to my surprise it landed squarely on Benjamin’s face, — Page 133. 



MORE SUCCESSFUL THAN USUAL 


133 


of the men on the ledge, and to my surprise it landed 
squarely on Benjamin’s face and I heard him utter a 
cry of pain, followed by words that were not exactly 
polite, as he wiped the blood from his cut and bruised 
lips. One of the lady police officers touched him on 
the shoulder and admonished him to be quiet, but he 
never smiled again during the remainder of the game. 
I could see that he was mad and was looking for 
trouble, and he got it, just as everybody does who 
looks for it. 

Over on the right hand of the home base and almost 
in front of us sat the official scorers, and around them, 
on some rocks, sat several sporty girls who apparently 
had no part in the game, but were making themselves 
veiy conspicuous by their frequent remarks and efforts 
at sarcasm. Benjamin looked straight at them for 
about ten minutes, then got up and walked over where 
they were and stood and gazed squarely in the face of 
the most impudent one of them all. She was attired 
in rather loose fitting knee pants — -I couldn’t call them 
bloomers — a striped sack coat of the same pattern as 
her breeches, a black satin vest cut very low and ex-, 
posing a stiff white shirt bosom, a man’s collar and 
tie, and a fedora hat tipped well over on one side of 
her head, and to cap it all, she smoked a cigarette and 
sat with her two hands jammed deep down in the 
pockets of her pants and her feet extended wide apart, 
1 wondered what Benjamin intended to do next. 1 
hoped that he wouldn’t say or do anything rash, but 
I didn’t have to wait long to find out, for he stepped 


134 bktsi<:y jane on the new woman 

right up to the object of his disgust, and slapping her 
pretty hard on the shoulder with his right hand, he 
said : 

“Get up and get out of here, you impudent thing; 
you have defaced society long enough by your vulgar 
dress and actions.” 

“What’s it to you, old haj^seed?” she retorted. 

“I have witnessed all of your disgraceful actions 
that I can stand. I have a wife upon yonder seats 
whom I respect, and I supposed that I was bringing 
her to a respectable place when I fetched her here, 
but no respectable people would tolerate the likes of 
you for a moment. Get up and get out, I say ; don’t 
deface society any longer by your wanton exercise of 
frivolit}^,” said Benjamin, and at the same time grab- 
bing her b}' the coat collar and giving her a rough 
jerking. His talk had attracted the attention of one 
of the police ofhcers, who promptly marched him out- 
side the grounds, where he waited until the game was 
over and I came out and joined him. 

We took the first car we could crowd into and re- 
turned to our hotel. Benjamin said he would have 
been very well satisfied with the afternoon’s sport if 
he hadn’t got struck with the ball and then put out of 
the grounds. I told him if he had kept his eyes open 
he could have seen and dodged the ball. and if he had 
kept away from the sporty girl he would not have got 
put out; taking it altogether, I thought he got off 
pretty well for one who had so little discretion. 

As for the ball game, I am satisfied that the new 


More successful than usual 


135 



“Get up and gpt out of here, you impudent thing; you have defaced 
society long enough/’ — Page 134. 



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MORE SUCCESSFUL THAN USUAL 


137 


women make much better ball players than fire fight- 
ers, and am satisfied to let them play ball all they 
want to, but I wouldn’t want to risk my property in 
their hands when it was in danger of fire. 


CHAPTER XL 


benjamin’s mistooks and mistakes. 

We were served with tish for breakfast the next 
morning, which reminded me that it was Friday. 
Benjamin could scarcely believe that it was only our 
hfth day out from home ; said it seemed a month to 
him; never imagined that a feller could crowd so 
much experience into such a short space of time^ and 
said he would give the price of a Jersey cow to know 
what the next hve days had in store for him. I told 
him that borrowing trouble was equal to borrowing 
money, for the latter invariably led to trouble, but if 
he would follow and obey me he would undoubtedly 
get through the trip without getting killed. He said 
he wouldn’t mind it much if he did get killed ; death 
no longer had any terror for him, as he would about 
as soon be dead as live under petticoat rule. 

After dispatching our morning meal I told Benja- 
min that we would look the city over thoroughly that 
da}" and stay over in Worcester another night. We 
left our wheels in the hotel and patronized the street 
cars when possible, walking When necessary. We 
found it, as I expected, to be a very fine city, not en- 
tirely given over into the hands of the new woman, 
but gradually and surely slipping her way. We visited 
many of the large factories, where great numbers of 
both men and women were employed. I had compas^ 

^38 


benjamin's MiSTOOKS AND MISTAKES 


139 




\ 


benjamin’s MISTOOKS AND MISTAKES I4I 

sion on the women who were obliged to toil so hard 
for a living, but thought to myself that they were the 
better off for having 'their hands and minds occupied 
and no time at their disposal in which to preach or 
listen to the new woman folderol. 

We called at the State Lunatic Asylum, and were 
treated with the greatest of courtesy by the ollicers 
and attendants. The cases that attracted my attention 
most were several women in the woman’s ward who 
had gone off their hooks on the new woman craze. 
Several of them were pacing the long halls or corri- 
dors in front of their rooms, and continually expostu- 
lating on the beauties and advantages of woman’s 
universal rule. They seemed to be as rational and 
harmless as many of their party or class who were not 
confined in any asylum, and I asked the attendant why 
they had been deprived of their liberty, but before he 
could answer my question I saw for myself. When 
they saw Benjamin they made a rush for him, and be- 
fore the attendant could push him through a door one 
of their number, a tall, lank female, with cropped hair 
and red eyes, threw her long, bony arms around his 
neck and shrieked at the top of her voice — which was 
very high toned and exceedingly sharp — “ Oh, Charlie ! 
Charlie! You will vote for me, won’t you? You 
won’t vote for Jane! Slie must not, she shall not de- 
feat me !” 

“Let go of me, you old fool; I ain’t your Charlie. 
I am that woman’s I^enjamin,” said he, at the same 
time struggling and stretching his arms out at me. 

“Oh, Charlie, vote for me! Vote for me! 1 must 


142 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

be elected!” continued the maniac, as she wound her 
arms so tightly about poor Benjamin’s neck that he 
coiild scarcely speak when he tried to explain to her 
that he lived in another county and was not eligible 
to vote there. 

The attendant had succeeded in forcing the other 
lunatics back and locking a door between them and 
us, and finally came to Benjamin’s rescue, but none 
too soon to save him from a horrible death resulting 
from strangulation. As soon as the poor old man was 
released he darted down the long hall at a wild cat 
jump, until he spied another woman moving stealthily 
forward to meet him with her arms outstretched and 
her eagle-claw fingers set akimbo ; her hair was flying 
loosely in the air and the muscles of her face were 
drawn and set, and her white teeth showing themselves 
conspicuously between the thin and parted lips. Ben- 
jamin’s hair — that is, the few sprigs that still adorn his 
intellectual sphere — raised up on end, and he made a 
frantic effort to stop short and retrace his steps, but in 
his endeavor to do so his feet slipped on the smooth 
waxed floor and he stretched out his full length at the 
feet of this being of terror, who bent over her help- 
less victim and began clawing and scratching him 
furiously, and saying, ‘‘Ah, villain, you are the man 
who laughed at me. I have you now. I will fix you 
for laughing at a woman.” 

Other attendants arrived on the scene at this junct- 
ure, being attracted by Benjamin’s screams, and the 
maniac was speedily rushed back into her room and 
the door locked in less time than it takes to tell about 


BEN’JAMTN’s mistooks and mistakes 143 



“Ah, villain, you are the man who laughed at me. I have you now. 
^Page 142, 






benjamin’s mistooks and mistakes 145 

it, and Benjamin was assisted to his feet. He could 
scarcely stand alone from fright, although he protested 
that he was mortally wounded. As soon as he could 
collect his wits he demanded to he shown out of the 
building at once. “Let me out of this infernal place 
at once, before some old hag gets it into her head that 
I am her Jimmie, or her Billy, and she ought to whale 
the life out of me for amusement,” said Benjamin. 

No amount of persuasion could induce him to ven- 
ture into another ward, and so I was obliged to post- 
pone further investigation of that model institution and 
accompany my frightened partner as the usher led the 
way down a long flight of stairs, through several 
courts, and Anally out of the big building. I wanted 
to take a stroll over the grounds, but Benjamin had 
heard them say that the inmates were taken out in 
squads for exercise every day, and he didn’t propose 
to take any chances of being recognized by any of 
them again, so we left the place altogether. 

Benjamin was anxious to return to the hotel, but I 
was not, and so told him to go on if he wanted to turn 
coward, but I would pursue my course. Accordingly 
we separated and he went his way and I continued my 
tour of the city, calling at the renowned Clark Uni- 
versity and other important educational institutions, of 
which the people of Worcester are very proud, and 
justly so too, for I found them well up to the standard 
in every respect, and was sorry we hadn’t sent Walter 
and Alice to Worcester to finish their education, in- 
stead of where we did. 

It was supper time when I arrived at our hotel, I 


146 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

went directly to our room and was surprised to find 
Benjamin there., but couldn’t account for his mood. He 
was sitting on the edge of the bed. with his head in 
his hands and his elbows on his knees, and did not look 
up or say a word when I came in. I told him to pre- 
pare to go down to supper, as I was hungry from my 
hard day’s tramp. 

‘‘Nope, don’t want any supper,” blubbered Benja- 
min, as he endeavored to spread his hands out to cover 
his face more thoroughly. 

“Don’t want any supper?” said I. “Should think 
you would have an appetite after your scrimmage up 
at the asylum. Come, get up and come along with 
me. What ails you, anyway ? What have you been 
doing since I left you? Didn’t come straight here. I’ll 
bet a dollar.” 

“You won’t bet a dollar with me, for I haven’t a 
sou to my name,” said Benjamin. 

“What on earth have you done with that ten-dollar 
bill I gave you this morning? Hope you haven’t been 
gambling, you who has been a member of the Baptist 
Church for more than twenty years. Hold up your 
brainless old head and explain the cause of your pen- 
niless condition,” said I in a firm voice. 

Lifting his head a little, but keeping his optics set . 
on the carpet, he proceeded to confess and explain as 
follows: “Well, Betsey, I have been the victim of a 
real confidence woman. Blame me if I can hardly tell 
you how she managed to fleece me, but she did it just 
the same. After leaving you I came straight down 
onto the main street, and a newsboy rushed up to me 


benjamin’s mistooks and mistakes 147 

and asked me to buy one of his papers. I thought it 
would be nice to have a paper to read, as 1 expected 
at that time to sit alone here in this room, so I told 
him I would take one, but when I went to pay for it I 
found that 1 hadn’t a cent of change, nothing but that 
ten-dollar bill that you gave me this morning, and the 
bby said he couldn’t change it. While I was going 
through my pockets again to make sure that I had no 
small change, a woman stepped up and said: ‘Why, 
it’s Mr. Jones! Just let me take that bill, Mr. Jones, 
and I will run across the street to a friend of mine and 
get it changed for you. You needn’t be at all wor- 
ried about getting it changed, Mr. Jones; the banks 
are closed and you would have trouble in breaking it 
yourself, for you are a stranger in this city, you know, 
but lucky for you, Mr. Jones, I happen to know you, 
and what is better, happened along just in time to 
help you out. ’ While she was running at the mouth 
as I have just told you, that blamed ten-dollar bill 
passed from my hand to hers. How or why it was 
done I can’t say, but it passed all the same, and I saw 
her trip gracefully across the street and enter a cigar 
and tobacco store. I waited and watched for her to 
return, and wondered how much I ought to give her 
for her kindness and trouble, and while I was think- 
ing to mj^self what a blamed good looking woman she 
was, and trying to remember where I had got ac- 
quainted with her, the newsboj^ twitched me by the 
sleeve and said I had better give him back the paper, 
for he guessed I was soaked. I didn’t know what he 
meant by my being soaked. I told him he could have 


148 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

his old paper if he wanted it, but that I wasn’t soaked 
or even moist. ‘You will catch on, old man, if you 
hang around here awhile, and you will know what it 
means to be soaked if your ten-dollar bills hold out 
long enough, ’ said the youngster. I began to under- 
stand that he was casting reflections on the honesty 
of the young woman, and I told him that he must be 
a little careful what he said about her, or I would tell 
on him when she came back, and he would get him- 
self into trouble. But he doubled himself up and 
laughed and laughed, and told some other newsboys, 
who happened to come up, all about it, while I was 
gazing across the street to see if I could see her com- 
ing. I thought to myself that change must be alllired 
scarce in this place, or else she had gone to sleep and 
forgot to set her alarm clock. ‘Well, old man, good- 
bye,’ said the kid; ‘1 am sorry you let that confidence 
woman pull your leg for you, but if you will charge 
it up to education you’ll find it ain’t a bad investment 
after all, ’ and he sauntered off down the street, shout- 
ing : ‘ Extra '‘addition !” All about the big robbery !’ 
and I wondered if it meant me. Well, I waited right 
there and watched for that w'oman tw'o straight hours, 
but never caught a glimpse of her measly form.*’ 

By the time he had finished relating his tale of woe 
he was on his feet, pacing the room and swinging his 
arms furiously. I told him to be calm and composed, 
and take the newsboy’s advice — ^since he never would 
listen to me — and charge the ten dollars up to educa- 
tion. He said he would charge it up to the new 
woman’s^ bureau for prevention of cruelty to animals. ” 


benjamin’s MISTOOKS AND MISTAKES 


149 



“You needn’t be at all worried about getting it changed, Mr. Jones.” 
—Page 147. 


) 


BENJAxMIN’s mistooks and mistakes 151 

I told him to come on and eat a hearty supper, and 
we would leave the city early the next morning and 
continue our journey before the sun got high. 

‘‘I shall never leave this place until I find that 
blamed confidence woman and bring her to Justice. 
I’ll see to it that she suffers for this trick,” said Ben- 
jamin. “I’ll let her know that I haven’t worked all 
my life to accumulate money for her to walk off with.” 

I recalled his attention to the fact that if he had 
heeded the good old adage, “While you’re getting, 
get wisdom,” that I had quoted to him so maiw times 
since I had been his wife, he would not now be like 
unto the fool and his money who are soon parted. But 
he made me promise never to take him near a crazy 
house again, and to explain to him how that woman 
knew he was Mr. Jones, before he would consent to 
go to his supper. 


CHAPTER XII. 

BENJAMIN GETS A START IN LIFE. 

When I awoke the next morning the first graj^ 
streaks of light were just breaking in the east, and 
Benjamin was alread}^ up and prepared to leave. I 
hastened to make my toilet, while he went down to 
the office to get our wheels out onto the street. It 
was scarcely light, and few people were astir as we 
rode out of the city. We changed our course and 
rode directly north, with the intention of making Fitch- 
burg next, which was about twenty-five miles distant, 
and stopping there over Sunday. 

It was a lovely morning, and we made good time 
and enjoyed the ride immensely. We had not gone 
far when it became light enough so that I could see 
Benjamin very plain, and, to my surprise and horror, 
he was wearing a bright red jersey or sweater which 
he had purchased before leaving home, but up to that 
time had not dared to wear, and would never have 
been able to go out with it on this time if it had been 
light enough so that I had noticed it before leaving our 
room. I rode up by his side, and as I looked squarely 
at him I thought that he looked more like a circus 
clown than a respectable man of middle age and a fam- 
ily, adorned as he was in this gorgeous article of 
apparel and his facial embellishment of white court 
plaster, I told him to stop right there and take that 

152 


IJENJAMIN GETS A START IN LIFE 1 53 

;;aiidy thing off, for it would certainly be the means 
of getting him into trouble. He only laughed at me, 
and said that since he had been to the expense of buy- 
ing it he proposed to get his money’s worth out of it. 

So we rode on, and I noticed that some of the coun- 
try through which we were passing was good, while 
a portion of it was rocky and rough. In this state it 
is so much different than where we used to live out in 
Illinois ; here there are no section lines ; farms are 
surveyed and described by so many links or chains 
from a given corner in a certain direction, thence in 
another direction so far, and so on around to the start- 
ing point. The roads are all crooked, but generally 
in good condition ; the fences are built of stone, or 
rails laid up in the worm or zigzag fashion. 

We arrived at the little town of Oakdale, about ten 
miles out from Worcester, in good season for break- 
fast, and after regaling ourselves at a modest restau- 
rant we proceeded on our way. 

About an hour after we had left Oakdale we were 
riding along a level turnpike road, which was flanked 
on either side by low pasture lands ; herds of cattle 
were feeding on the luxuriant green grass, and my 
attention was attracted by a hne specimen of the bovine 
family in the shape of a large red taurus, who stopped 
eating and raised his head to obtain a good look at us. 
Benjamin’s showy red sweater seemed to have a 
strange attraction for him, as he trotted along the 
fence shaking his huge head and emitting loud bel- 
lows. I told Benjamin to hurry up, or the brute woul d 
break through the fence and make mincemeat of him, 


154 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

but he only grinned and said he was not afraid of it ; 
but I quickened my pace and soon opened quite a 
gap between us. Suddenly I heard a crash as of 
breaking rails, and looking back, saw that the animal 
had broken down the fence and was making for 
Benjamin like a cyclone. That individual understood 
what had taken place, and knew that it meant an ac- 
tive campaign for him. He did not lose a moment, 
but bending low down on his wheel, he shot forward 
like a race horse, with the huge brute thundering at 
his heels. I knew that it also stood me in hand to 
make good time, and imitating my husband’s exam- 
ple, I was soon flying along the road, which was 
smooth and level. 

VVe had but little difliculty in keeping well in ad 
vance of the brute, but I noticed that there was quite 
a hill to climb not far ahead, and putting on all the 
steam I could command, I soon began to leave Ben- 
jamin, who was taking it easy far in the rear. When 
I reached the foot of the hill I discovered, to my hor- 
ror, that it was sandy, but knew that I could get over 
• it in time, but was not certain about Benjamin, as he 
was quite a long way in the rear. 

On reaching the summit of the hill I ascertained 
that the country beyond was comparatively level, and 
felt certain that I was free from danger, barring ac- 
cident, and then turned to look for Benjamin, who 
had also discovered the hill, but had lost so much time 
that I feared he would be overtaken before he could 
surmount the sandy eminence. When he reached the 
foot of the hill the infuriated brute was not more than 



\ 


But Benjamin was more fortunate and cleared the fence without any perceptible effort. 
—Page 157- 




;■ • -r,' ' .7. f-: 




BENJAMIN GETS A START IN LIFE 157 

forty feet behind him, and I knew that it was all up 
with him and his red jersey. 

When Benjamin struck the sand his speed decreased 
with alarming rapidity, and turning suddenly to the 
right, he left the road and made for the fence, which 
was considerably lower than the roadbed. His pur- 
suer also turned and followed like an avalanche. Ben- 
jamin had not the time to dismount and climb over 
the fence, and neither had he time to turn and double 
on the animal, but went right at the fence like an 
English steeple rider. Suddenly there was a crash ; 
the cycle had run squarely into the fence, which was 
made of stone and was a good solid one too, and did 
not give way, but the wheel was unable to surmount 
the obstruction, although the front wheel did make a 
strong effort to climb over. But Benjamin was more 
fortunate and cleared the fence without any percepti- 
ble effort. Unfortunately, or perhaps it would be 
better to say fortunately, he landed fairly on a pile of 
stones just inside the fence, turned a complete somer- 
sault and lay stretched out at full length on the green 
sward. The brute outside contented himself with 
making an almost total wreck of Benjamin’s wheel, 
which he tossed about on his horns in a very playful 
manner. I screamed to Benjamin to take off that 
sweater, and he understood me, and for once in his 
life obeyed without the slightest remonstrance, and 
hid it under the pile of stones, and then noticing the 
antics of his late pursuer and the damage which was 
beinir done to his wheel, he seemed to recover his 
former nerve and hardihood, and gathering up a hand- 


158 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

full of rocks, commenced to hurl them at his adver- 
saiy with considerable force and precision, and ulti- 
mately with such good results that the animal began 
to give ground and finally left Benjamin and his ma- 
chine to their own reflections by turning and gallop- 
ing down the road. 

When the brute was well out of reach, Benjamin 
secured his sweater and climbed over the fence to 
procure his machine and ascertain what damage it had 
sustained. 

I came back down the hill, and we soon learned, 
for the time at least, that the wheel was utterly use- 
less, and I told him not to stand there crjdng over his 
misfortune but get into his sweater immediately, as 
some one was coming over the summit of the hill in a 
buggy, and he would make an unenviable show of 
himself. He looked up and saw a lady approaching 
us, seated in an open buggy and driving a large black 
horse, and seizing his red jersey he thrust his arms 
into the sleeves and flopped it over his head in his 
usual awkward manner of dressing himself, and began 
clawing and trying to pull it down over his head, 
just as he flaunted his red banner in the air, the lady’s 
horse, which had come down the hill at a rapid rate 
and was almost opposite him, became terribly fright- 
ened, and dashed franticly down the opposite side of 
the road and shattered the buggy in fragments against 
the stone wall. The lady landed without difticulty or 
injury, and was on her feet before the report of the 
crash had ceased to echo and reverberate over the 
bluffs that surrounded us. Her horse did not run 



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BENJAiVlIN GETS A START IN LIFE 


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l3ENjAiML\ GETS A START IN LIFE l6l 

away ; it had struck one corner of itself against the 
fence, and consequently couldn’t stand on one of its 
front legs. 

llenjainin finally succeeded in peeling his sweater 
down over his head and shoulders, and we all three 
came together for a consultation of war. The lady said 
that she expected Benjamin to reimburse her for the 
loss of the buggy and also the damage done to her 
horse. Further conversation revealed the fact that 
she was a stock buyer and general speculator, and 
lived in Fitchburg. She owned the land on the east 
side of the road and the stock that was feeding there- 
on, including the old Durham fellow that had chased 
Benjamin and demolished his wheel. She was com- 
ing out to salt her cattle and inspect her flocks and 
fences, and was glad to call honors even when Benja- 
min had told his story. 

I told them that there was no use to tarry there and 
dwell on the scenes of their calamity longer, and Ben- 
jamin, making a virtue of necessity, shouldered his 
disabled wheel and started up the road toward Fitch- 
burg, while the woman walked beside him and pulled 
her horse along by the bridle rein as fast as it could 
travel on three legs. I tried to ride slow enough to 
keep them company, but found it a very tiresome and 
unpleasant undertaking, and so told them to comfort 
each other as best they could, for I proposed to ride 
on to Fitchburg, where I would wait for Benjamin 
at the hotel. 

I arrived in the city shortly after noon, but not too 
late to secure a good dinner, which I dispatched with 


i62 BETSEY jane ON THE NEW WOMAN 

a relish I had been at the hotel more than an hour 
and was sitting on the veranda taking my ease when 
Benjamin and his new-found friend appeared in sight, 
coming up the main street toward the hotel. I thought 
if I had been in their places I would have sneaked 
into town on some back street and not made such a 
public exhibition of myself in such an awkward situ- 
ation There were more than a dozen guests sitting 
on the portico beside me, and a crowd of boys were 
playing in the street near by, and on seeing the 
queer looking pair approaching they began to shout 
in a derisive manner : “Hurrah! Hurrah! Get out 
of the way, for the hayseeds are coming!” They 
paid no attention to the notice that was taken of~them, 
but came on up to the hotel, where Benjamin inquired 
and learned of a good place to get his wheel repaired. 
He said he would take it to the repair shop and set 
the man to work at it and then return to his dinner, 
and the woman proceeded up the street with her dis- 
abled horse. 


CHAPTER XIIL 


BENJAMIN IN THE TALONS OF THE LAW. 

After leaving his wheel at the repair shop, Ben- 
jamin returned to the hotel for dinner. He managed 
to make out a pretty square meal, for his morning’s 
adventure had given him a prodigious appetite. 

I remained near Benjamin until he had finished his 
dinner, when I informed him that I was going out for 
a tour of the city to see and learn what I could that 
might be of interest and benefit to me, and I invited him 
to accompany me. He declined my invitation and 
said he would go down to the shop, where he could 
sit down and rest and watch the man work on his 
wheel, and at the same time chat with him. Said 
that the man seemed like a very pleasant and agree- 
able fellow, and he thought he would enjoy his com- 
panj" very much. I could see no harm in his doing 
as he wanted to in this case, and no chance for him to 
get into trouble, so gave my consent and we parted, 
Benjamin going toward the shop arid I going my way. 

It did not take me long to discover that the new 
woman had struck Fitchburg with all her force. As 
in other cities that I had visited, the police officers 
were all women, the stores were all operated by 
women, there were women lawyers, women doctors, 
women magistrates, and even women were driving 
the hacks and omnibuses and operating the street cars. 

163 


164 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

The streets were as clean as a house floor ; they were 
washed and scrubbed — by men— every morning, and 
a force of sweepers were kept at work throughout the 
day to clean up and carry away anything and every- 
thing that might be dropped. The dust was even 
wiped from the pavements and curbstones. Every 
foot of walk on the main streets, and in most of the 
resident streets, was flagstones or granite taken from 
the granite quarries in the vicinity. On every corner, 
and at close intervals along the blocks, were placed iron 
baskets in which all waste paper, orange, banana 
and other fruit peelings or refuse were placed; and 
every few feet were large iron cuspidors to spit in, 
and I noticed that everybody was very careful to use 
them for that purpose when they expectorated. The 
administrators of the affairs of the city were as thought- 
ful and particular about the alleys as they were of the 
streets. Every business house was provided with an 
iron barrel, fitted with a cover, in which ashes and 
all refuse must be placed. The waste-paper baskets, 
spittoons and ash or garbage barrels were emptied into 
wagons every night after business hours and carted 
off out of the city. I was delighted with the cleanly 
and orderly appearance of everything I saw, and ac- 
knowledged to the new woman street-cleaning boss 
that it beat anything I had seen so far as my obser- 
vation had extended. 

Everything seemed to be moving quietly and se- 
renely along, not a jar or ripple anywhere to disturb 
the tranquillity of that model city, the gem of neatness 
and proud specimen of the ability and fitness of the 


BENJAMIN IN THE TALONS OF THE LAW 165 

new woman to rule and govern in municipal affairs. 

It was about 4 o’clock in the afternoon when I was 
suddenly aroused from my placid ruminations by the 
sound of loud voices. Down the street near where 
Benjamin was getting, his wheel repaired, a large 
crowd was gathered^ and a great commotion was at- 
tracting the attention of everybody within four blocks. 
I walked that way, and as I neared the scene I heard 
an angry voice which sounded very much like that of 
my dear Benjamin. I increased my pace, and as I 
drew nearer, a sight met my eyes which convinced 
me that my foolish old husband had again managed 
to get himself into trouble. 

In front of the very shop where Benjamin had gone 
for a quiet chat with a pleasant and agreeable friend 
stood the object of my affections. He was surrounded 
by more than a dozen women, one of whom wore a 
police officer’s uniform and star. This woman had a 
tirm grip on Benjamin’s coat collar, and was flourish- 
ing a huge billy around my poor partner’s head in a 
reckless sort of way. The other women were danc- 
ing around and talking in loud, angry and excited 
voices. Benjamin’s face was very pale, but he too 
appeared to be both angry and defiant. I determined 
to ascertain the cause of the trouble, and walked 
nearer to Benjamin, who was the center of the mob. 
As I approached I heard such exclamations as : ‘‘Tar 
and feather him !” “Hang him!” “Put him in the 
jug !” — which were much more forcible than polite. I 
elbowed my way through the crowd until I was near 
enough to speak to my husband, who had not yet seen 


1 66 bf:tsey JANE on the new woman 

me. “Benjamin!” I said, “what is the matter ? What 
is all this row about?” 

Benjamin looked around and saw me, and replied : 
“Oh, it’s some more of the wq’bemen’s blarsted non- 
sense, and I wish the whole lot of them was in Guinea, 
or some other place.” 

At this some one of the women screamed: “Lis- 
ten to the profane wretch!” “What a vile, impudent 
man !” and a lot more similar expressions. > 

I tried to find out what was the matter, but could 
get nothing satisfactory out of the howling mob, for 
such it now appeared to be. 

The officer who had taken hold of Benjamin now 
attempted to march her prisoner up the street, but he 
did not seem inclined to go, so she called on several 
of her sisters to assist her. They grasped different 
parts of Benjamin’s wardrobe and anatomy, and tried 
to drag him along, but he resisted and fought desper- 
ately, kicking, striking and jerking about at a very 
lively rate, much to the discomfort of the officer and 
her assistants. 

I did not consider it polite to interfere until I knew 
more about the circumstances of the arrest, for such I 
supposed it to be. Benjamin made such a stout re- 
sistance that the officer finally called upon a drayman 
who was passing to back his vehicle up to the walk, 
which he quickly did. Then the mob of new women 
lifted Benjamin bodily and threw him upon the dray, 
where half a dozen of them sat down upon his recum- 
bent frame with a great deal more force than polite- 
ness. Benjamin was not idle during this performance. 


BENJAMIN IN THE TALONS OF THE LAW 



This woman had a firm grip on Benjamin’s coat collar, and 
flourishing a huge billy. — Page 165. 



BENJAMIN IN THE TALONS OF THE LAW 


and made it exceedingly interesting for everybody 
within his reach. The team started down the street, 
followed by a large portion of the crowd. I could 
hear Benjamin’s voice as he howled: “If they will 
give me a fair chance I can wipe the earth with the 
whole gang of them.” 

1 asked one of the bystanders where they were tak- 
ing Benjamin to, and she said, to the city lock-up, 
which was several blocks away. I walked leisurely 
along, determined to learn what my unfortunate hus- 
band had been doing, and to ascertain how I was to 
extricate him from his present predicament. 

I soon reached the jail, a small brick structure. 
Benjamin was already languishing behind the bars, 
and the city marshal was just leaving when I 
arrived, but I spoke to her and said that I would 
like to have an interview with the prisoner. The mar- 
shal, a large, masculine looking creature, eyed me 
rather sharply and asked me what I wanted to see the 
prisoner for. 1 told her that the prisoner was my 
husband, and that I wished to see him and learn the 
cause of his arrest and to take measures to secure his 
release. The officer said that she did not think that 
I would be able to do this before the next Monday 
morning, when the case would be brought up for trial 
before a justice of the peace. She said that Benja- 
min had resisted arrest, and that this in itself would 
be a very serious charge against him ; but that if I 
wished to secure counsel for the defense, she could 
recommend me to the best criminal lawyer in the city. 

1 thanked her and placed a silver dollar in her hand. 


1 70 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

at the same time repeating my request to be allowed 
to see Benjamin, as I would then be able to prepare a 
much better defense. 

The dollar had a magical effect upon the new wom- 
an, as it sometimes does on the masculine officials of 
the law ; the only perceptible difference being, that 
the new woman is much less exacting in her charge, 
but this will probably change as soon as they have 
been in power long enough to fully realize the worth 
of their authority. 

The marshal told me to come on and she would 
allow me to see Benjamin just a short time. She un- 
locked the door after a considerable trouble, for the 
new woman is not a natural-born mechanic, and prob- 
ably never will be. 

At last the door swung open and I entered a small, 
dark apartment, lighted by a single grated window. 
The door closed and I heard the key turn in the lock, 
with the marshal on the outside. As soon as my eyes 
had grown accustomed to the gloom which pervaded 
the dingy room, I spied my Benjamin seated on a 
small bench near the door. He was a perfect picture 
of dejection and despair, sitting with his head bowed 
on his hands as if in prayer, but I do not think from 
his opening remarks that he had been in very close 
communion with his Divine Creator, as his first, words 
were: “ Darn the whole blarsted lot of them! If I 
ever get out of this infernal hole I’ll make straight 
for home, and never leave it again until I am carried 
out feet first, but I hope that I’ll live long enough to 


BENJAMIN IN THE TALONS OF THE LAW I7I 



He was a perfect picture of dejection and despair.— Page 170 










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BENJAMIN IN THE TyVLONS OB' THE LAW I 73 

see every gosh darned wo’beman buried fifty fathoms 
deep before that happens.” 

1 was shocked by Benjamin’s profanity, but remem- 
bering his experiences during the day, I concluded it 
would be better to pass it over without any remarks, 
and said: “Well, Benjamin, what have you been do- 
ing to get yourself into such a place as this?” 

He looked up, scowled savagely, and said: “Noth- 
ing but take a chew of tobacco, and even that is 
against the law in this confounded stuck-up place. 
Fitchburg! Well, I should say that it was a ‘Fits- 
burg, ’ and everybody had fits who lived in it.” 

“You seemed to act like you had fits a little while 
ago,” I remarked satirically. 

“Oh, yes, a fellow gets fits if he happens to take a 
chew of tobacco, and then try to spit on the sidewalk,” 
he remarked grimly. 

“Benjamin,” I said, “I have always talked to you 
about the evil of using tobacco, but you would never 
listen to me, and said it did not injure you or anybody 
else, but at last you have learned that it does, and you 
need 'blame nobody but yourself, for if you had kept 
your mouth shut and attended to your own business, 
instead of sitting around chewing tobacco and trying 
to expectorate on the sidewalks, you probably would 
not be where you are now.” 

“Betsey, if j^ou have come here to give me a free 
lecture on the tobacco question, you would do well 
to leave suddenly,” said Benjamin, with an ugly look 
on his usually calm and placid countenance. 

“I did not come to lecture you, but to find out what 


1^4 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

you had been doing and how to get you out of this 
trouble,” I said. 

‘‘Well, I’ll tell you how it all happened. You see, 
1 went down to the shop to see the man hx up my 
cycle in good shape ; he appeared to be a pretty fine 
fellow, as I told you, and we got to talking about the 
new woman. I bit off a big chew of the weed and 
prepared to enjoy myself, and was getting along 
swimmingly, when just as I went to spit out of the 
door, one of them confounded new, or rather old 
women — for I’ll bet that she was more than fifty — 
came along. She had on a bran span new white mus- 
lin dress, and had got fairly in front of the door just 
as I let go a mouthful of saliva and tobacco juice. I 
saw my mistake when it was too late, and so did the 
new woman, but that did not hinder the catastrophe, 
for about half a pint of the mixture struck her dress 
skirt, and frescoed it up in a way that beats any Ital- 
ian sundown ever witnessed.” 

Benjamin stopped and sighed heavily, but said 
nothing. 

“Well, what then?” I asked. 

“What then! What do you think?” replied Ben- 
jamin. 

“I suppose there was trouble,” I said. 

“You can just bet there was, for the new woman 
was the postmistress, and a cranky, cross, crabbed, 
dried up old maid, somewhere between fifty and one 
hundred years old, just the kind of a person a man of 
good sense would pick out to spit tobacco juice on. 
She was so darned mad that she fairly squealed, when 


BENJAMIN IN THE TALONS OF THE LAW 1 75 

she told me that she would make me suffer for that 
cowardly, dirty, degrading insult. She howled and 
danced a war dance with an occasional whoop until 
the city marshal ran up puffing like a whale, and she 
told her to arrest me for spitting on her and the side- 
walk too, both of which I learned too late were viola- 
tions of the city ordinances.” 

“So that was the cause of your being arrested and 
dragged all over the town and then set upon.^” said I. 

“Yes, that was the cause, and it still remains to be 
seen just what the effect will be,” remarked Benja- 
min savagely. 

“I will do what I can to get you out of this, al- 
though I am afraid that you will have to stay here 
over Sunday and stand trial next Monday.” 

“Time’s up!” said the marshal, unlocking the door. 

I bade Benjamin good-b}^, telling him that I would 
see a lawyer and do my best to get him released on 
bail, and then the door closed upon my poor husband, 
and I walked away with the city marshal, leaving 
Benjamin to meditate upon the atrocity of his crime 
and resolve which of the two evils was the greater, 
the tobacco habit or the new woman. 


CHAPTER XIV. 


THE NEW WOMAN IN COURT. 

As the cit}^ marshal and myself walked down the 
street, she told me that Mrs. J. Ellen Forrester was 
undoubtedly the best attorney in the city, and would 
be able to do more for Benjamin than all the rest of 
them combined, and that she would take me to her 
office. 

We soon reached a stairway which led up to the 
second story of a large brick building. We ascended, 
and on reaching the second floor, turned to the right 
and entered a large, airy room which faced the street 
we had just left. As we entered I saw a woman stand- 
ing at a desk sorting over some papers. She looked 
up, bowed and went on with her work. The marshal 
gave me a chair, saying that the lady would soon be 
at leisure, and as she, the marshal, could do nothing 
more for me at that time, she would leave, but assured 
me that Benjamin would be well provided for during 
his incarceration. We held each other’s right hands, 
and another silver dollar passed from my hand to hers 
as we shook and said good-evening. 

I had ample time to look over and study the new 
woman lawyer. She was a large, well formed woman, 
about forty years of age ; her eyes were sharp and 
black, and her hair was also black, but cut quite short 
and parted on one side, which gave her quite a mas- 
176 








THE NEW WOMAN IN COURT 179 

culine look. She did not wear bloomers, but was at- 
tired in a shirt waist and a sort of jacket, closely 
resembling those worn by boys of ten or twelve years. 
Her face was quite handsome and her carriage both 
stately and graceful. It was evident to me that in 
her proper sphere she would have been an ornament 
to society and her home, but this manliness was not 
at all becoming to her, as she lacked the size and 
strength of a well developed man, and was altogether 
too masculine to be effeminate. I thought what a pity 
it was that such a woman should spoil what might 
have been a true womanly life and thus lower herself 
in the estimation of all true, right-minded men and 
women. 

Mrs. Forrester finished her work and then turned 
to me with an expectant and interrogative air. 

I told her my name and the object of my trip, and 
then the cause of my visit to her. She seemed quite 
interested and said that although there seemed to be a 
very strong case against my husband, she believed that 
she could extricate him without much difficulty. She 
also said that the postmistress was a very singular 
woman, both in person and number, and the possessor 
of a decidedly bitter and vindictive disposition, and that 
we could look for no mercy there, but we could get 
the trial before a justice who was noted for her leni- 
ency to male offenders, as she was a widow, who 
would probably marry again if she could secure the 
desired opportunity. Of course it would be a jury 
trial, and she, Mrs. F., believed that she could pack 
the jury in such a manner that it would be impossible 


l8o BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

to secure a conviction, but of course that would take 
money ; and she looked sharply at me to ascertain how 
the shot struck. 

I was equal to the emergency, and told her that al- 
though I was not a millionaire, I could still manage to 
pay a fair fee, and asked what she would take to clear 
Benjamin. 

She said that it would cost me fifty dollars, which 
was very cheap, but as we were strangers in her city 
she did not wish us to leave with a bad opinion of 
either the town or its justice. 

I then asked her what chance there was of getting 
Benjamin out on bail. The lawyer said it might be 
accomplished, but that it would take considerable time 
and trouble and some money. 

I thought the matter over, and remembering Ben- 
jamin’s many faults and his lack of due regard for the 
tender sex, I concluded that it would be well to give 
him an opportunity to meditate on his misdeeds and 
spend a quiet Sabbath where he could not get into 
further difficult}^; and then the extra cost was not de- 
sirable either, so I left the lawyer’s office, determined 
to leave my husband to his solitary reflections. 

I returned to the hotel and ate my supper, and being 
very tired, went to my room at an early hour and soon 
sought my bed and slumber. 

Sunday was a beautiful day and the many church 
bells pealed forth a joyous w^elcome, calling the twenty 
odd thousand souls of Fitchburg from their various 
occupations and stations of life to come out to the 
houses erected to God and dedicated to the cause of 


THE NEW WOMAN IN COURT l8l 

Christ and humanity, and offer thanks to their Creator 
for all the mercies and blessings of heaven. I had 
lotted very much on attending church on this occasion, 
but when I reflected on the circumstances of the 
evening before, I could not bear the thoughts of ap- 
pearing in so public a place, knowing that Benjamin 
was lying in jail and everybody knew all about it, for 
the whole episode had been published in extra editions 
of the daily papers. So I spent the day at the hotel 
and occupied my mind by reading. 

I was up bright and early the next Monday morn- 
ing and sought Lawyer Forrester’s office, where I 
found her in deep consultation with a sister lawyer, 
whom she had employed to assist her, as she had 
learned that the postmistress had already hired another 
attorney to assist the regular city prosecutor. 

The case was set for trial before Judge Walton, the 
widow who had been spoken of the Saturday evening 
before, and the case was to be called at nine o’clock 
sharp. I had a short talk with Mrs. Forrester and 
her colleague, and then went to find the city marshal, 
as I wished to hold a conference with Benjamin be- 
fore the trial. 

I finally gained admittance to his lodgings, where I 
found him looking rather sober, for now that his tem- 
per had cooled down he began to realize the position 
which he was in. Benjamin knew enough about law 
to know that resisting an officer was no slight offense, 
and he was beginning to tremble at the prospect of an 
extended visit to the penitentiary. I told him what I 
had done, which seemed to cheer him up a considera- 


182 BETSEY JANE ON THIi NEW WOMAN 

ble. He told me to get the cycles ready for a sudden 
start, as he would watch every opportunity to escape, 
and believed that he could succeed in getting away if 
he had half a chance, which he thought would be 
much cheaper than paying lawyers’ fees and fines. I 
promised him that I would do as he suggested, although 
I believed that it would be much cheaper to -face the 
music. He said if we did succeed in getting away he 
would send our lawyer a check to pay her for her 
trouble and assistance to him in the case. 

I returned to the hotel and sent a messenger to the 
bicycle repair shop where Benjamin’s wheel was, and 
had the man bring it up to the hotel, where I paid him 
for the job, after which I packed up our belongings, 
rolled the wheels outside, and sat down to await the 
hour of trial. 

At the appointed time I found my way to the office 
of the justice of the peace ; it was a long, low room on 
the ground floor, a couple of doors from the hotel. The 
room was more than half full of people when I ar- 
rived, the most of whom were women. The few men 
who had dropped in seemed to feel their degradation 
keenly, and were given seats near the door. These 
men removed their hats and spoke in the most subdued 
whispers, looking as if they were afraid to say their 
souls were their own. And all this the effect of eman- 
cipation. 

The judge, a short, fleshy personage, with a round, 
good-natured face and a plump figure, occupied the 
chair of honor, and was busily engaged in laughing 
and chatting with the attorneys. 


THE NEW WOMAN IN COURT 1 83 

As the clock struck the hour of nine, the outer door 
opened and in walked the marshal and Benjamin, 
closely followed by a couple of deputies. They led 
my husband up to the bar of justice as if he had been 
some common sneak thief, instead of a decent, re- 
spectable man and a deacon in the church. 

As soon as he was seated, his counsel, Mrs. J. Ellen 
Forrester, went up and shook hands with him. The 
justice rapped on her desk and called the court to 
orde>^, and then the work of impaneling a jury began, 
with the usual number of objections, some of which 
were sustained and others overruled. But at last six 
jurywomen, all of them good and true, were selected 
and swore that they would give Benjamin a fair trial 
according to the law and evidence ; then the trial com- 
menced by the postmistress taking the stand and testi- 
fying substantially as Benjamin had said. When the 
prosecution had finished with the witness she was 
turned over to the tender mercies of the opposing 
counsel, who proceeded to cross-examine her in a man- 
ner which brought the hot blood to the withered 
cheeks of the witness and convulsed the spectators 
with laughter. 

Mrs. F. commenced with, “Were you ever in love ?” 

The counsel for the prosecution objected, but was 
overruled. 

The witness said it was nobody’s business if she 
had been in love. 

“Then you admit that you have been in love?” 

The witness replied that she believed she had once 
been so foolish, 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


Mrs. F. continued: “You admit that you have not 
only been in love, but that you were actually in love 
with one of these horrid men?” 

The witness replied in the affirmative, but said that 
she was then very young and did not know any better, 
to which Mrs. Forrester added, sotto voce, that it must 
have been a very long time ago. 

Mrs. F. then said: “I believe you once figured in 
a breach of promise suit, as the result of your early 
love?” 

The opposition again objected, when the defense 
claimed that they wished to show that prejudice was 
the motive for the prosecution, and the witness was 
compelled to answer, which she did by saying that 
she had once sued one of those mean, perfidious men 
because he failed to keep his contract, but that she 
had never regretted his failure to keep faith with her. 

Mrs. Forrester then went on to say: “Since that 
time you have never lost a single opportunity to make 
poor, weak, inoffensive man feel the bitterness of 
spirit which was roused in your being by the afore- 
said disappointment in love, and have even made your 
boast that you would not even allow man the privilege 
of speaking above a whisper, and that you would get 
even with every mother’s son of them if you lived 
long enough, and it would appear that you have made 
many a man regret the day of his birth, if j^our mature 
age is any indication that your threat has been carried 
out.” 

The witness was now thoroughly aroused, and losing 
all fear of the court and everybody else, she shrieked ; 






TliJi NEW WOMAN IN COURT 1 85 






The scene which followed beggars description.— Page 188. 



THE NEW WOMAN IN COURT 


187 


have not come in here to be insulted by every'mar- 
ried woman who has a family of young ones and don’t 
know enough to stay at home and take care of them, 
but who prefers to spend her time in running down 
respectable women, and if any more slurs are thrown 
at me I will rise in m}^ might and hew, hack and slay 
my tormentors.” 

Mrs. F. also waxed warm and said that she did not 
propose to take any back talk from witnesses who 
were in their dotage, and if the court could not shut 
that old relic up she could, and would do it pretty 
effectually too. 

The counsel for the prosecution, who was a large, 
raw-boned woman, and looked as if she might possess 
extraordinary muscular power, leaped to her feet and 
remarked that that was a game which two could play 
at, and that Mrs. J. Ellen would do well to attend to 
the business in hand and not spend all her time in bul- 
lyragging the witness. 

Mrs. Forrester’s fighting blood was up to fever 
heat, and she told her legal adversary that she could 
wipe up the office with her and her evaporated client 
in just two minutes. 

The justice and the marshal pounded on their desks 
and screamed for order, but their efforts in that direc- 
tion had no more effect than if they had talked to the 
balmy June breeze which floated in at the open win- 
dows. 

The two reserve lawyers now came to their feet 
and proposed to take part in the fracas which seemed 
inevitable. 


i88 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


The postmistress precipitated events by telling Mrs. 
J. Ellen Forrester that she was anything but a respect- 
able woman. Mrs. Ellen made a clutch at the old 
maid’s gray frizzes, and the battle was on. The scene 
which followed beggars description, as pandemonium 
seemed to have broken loose, for at was a free fight, 
each party having its friends and hearty supporters, 
even the jury taking part in the general mel^e. 

Benjamin had been knocked over in the first round, 
and was kicked about until, when he stopped rolling, he 
was some distance from the contestants. He looked 
back at me, for I had been sitting near the door ac- 
cording to his instructions, and motioned for me to get 
out of there, a hint which I was not slow in following. 

I did not go until I had seen Benjamin leap out of 
the open window, and run in the direction of the hotel. 
His escape did not attract the least attention, and in 
fact, I do not think anybody observed him, as all were 
too busily engaged in scratching and hair-pulling to 
have observed anything smaller than a cyclone, and 
as I afterward learned from our attorney, his absence 
was not noticed for nearly an hour later. When the citj’ 
marshal recovered from a blow on the head, which 
came from a heavy chair, and crawled out from under 
the table, she began to look for her prisoner, but he 
had vanished. 

I left as rapidly as I could, and when I reached the 
hotel I found Benjamin just mounting his wheel, and 
as I had taken the precaution to pay for our accom- 
modations, we were not detained for a single instant. 


THE NEW WOMAN IN COURT 


189 


and were soon mounted and gliding down the streets, 
leaving Fitchburg to the peace and quietude of its 
own reflections. 


CHAPTER XV. 


THE NEW WOMAN AS A PHYSICIAN. 

We made good time for a couple of hours after leav- 
ing Fitchburg, as Benjamin feared that we would be 
pursued ; he said that we would get dinner at some 
farm house, as he did not wish to enter any town that 
day. 

When the dinner hour arrived we stopped at a fine, 
large farm house, which was surrounded by well culti- 
vated fields. On riding into the yard we were greeted 
by a woman of about my own age, who was just com- 
ing from the barn. ^ She was attired in a plain, regu- 
lation bloomer costume, of cheap but strong goods, 
without any fancy work ; she wore a plain straw hat 
and heavy shoes, and said that her name was Mrs. 
Dolittle ; that she and her two grown daughters 
managed the farm, while her husband and son at- 
tended to the household duties. We asked her if we 
could get dinner, and she very pleasantly informed us 
that we could, but when I said that her husband might 
object, she smiled very sweetly and said that it was 
not at all probable, as he had long since learned the 
futility of any such remonstrances, as her wish was 
law in that household. 

Mrs. Dolittle was not a large, masculine-looking 
woman, as might be supposed, but on the contrary, 
was a lady of medium size, and had* at some time dur- 
1^0 


THE NEW WOMAN AS A PHYSICIAN 


I9I 

ing her existence been a very handsome woman, and 
a decided blonde, and from the shape of her mouth 
and chin, it was evident to me that she had not lost 
any of her decision. She had blue eyes and golden 
hair, but her complexion was not the soft, creamy white 
that I fancy it once was, for her exposure to the ele- 
ments had transformed it into a rich brown. The two 
daughters closely resembled their mother in features 
and complexion, but were both taller and heavier; 
they were fine looking girls, and dressed in the same 
manner as the head of the family, for such the mother 
undoubtedly was. 

On entering the house, which was scrupulously 
neat and clean, we were introduced to the head of the 
culinary department, Mr. Dolittle, and his son. a lad 
of about fifteen. Dinner was ready and we sat down 
to an elegant meal, which was the best cooked of any 
meal I had partaken of since leaving home. When 
we were seated Mrs. Dolittle said grace and then 
proceeded to wait on the table, while Mr. D. busied 
himself behind the tea urn, and in running back and 
forth to the kitchen for the different courses of food 
as they were needed. He apologized for the bread, 
saying that his wife and the girls had neglected to 
provide him with the necessary wood, and that he 
neither could nor would saw wood. The gentleman 
also apologized for the butter, which he said was due 
to the fact that Mrs. Dolittle fooled away too much 
time in churning. 

Everything passed off smoothly and harmoniously. 

I was just beginning to think that the new order of 


192 


liETSKV JANE ON TllE NEW WOMAN 


things was not so bad after all, when an event occurred 
which caused me to change my mind very suddenly. 
A small rat-and-tan dog, which had been nosing around 
the room, finally succeeded in heading off a big rat 
which had sneaked into the kitchen ; the rat ran into 
the dining room and under the table. The result was 
startling ; the three new -women rose to their feet with 
lightning-like rapidity, and each and every one of them 
emitted a scream which nearly frightened the rat out 
of his senses, and checked the rush of the dog. The 
head of the family jumped upon the table, scattering 
the dishes in every direction ; one of the daughters 
climbed on a chair, while the other ran out of the 
door. 

Mr. D. knocked the rat over with a stick of wood, 
Mrs. D. came down off her perch, as did her daughter, 
and quiet was soon restored. This event proved very 
conclusively that these new women were still a long 
way from perfection in their new role, and that it 
would take years, possibly generations, for woman to 
rid herself of this w'eakness of her sex. 

We resumed our journey after dinner, feeling pretty 
well satisfied that even under the most advantageous 
circumstances the new woman was not entirelj' a suc- 
cess. 

' About four o’clock we were passing a large orchard, 
when Benjamin noticed some fine looking apples and 
expressed a desire to purloin a few of them, but I told 
him that they were not yet ripe and would make him 
sick, to say nothing of the sin of stealing, but he 
would not be convinced and said that he was going to 


Till-; MiW Woman as a physician 193 

have some of those apples. I saw that I could not 
dissuade him from his purpose, and finally told him to 
go ahead and get the cholera morbus if he wanted to. 
He took me at my word and dismounted, leaving his 
wheel leaning against the fence, over which he climbed 
and was soon snugly ensconced among the branches 
of a large apple tree, busily engaged in filling his 
pockets. Suddenly I heard a loud, angry barking in 
the direction of the house and knew that it was time 
for Benjamin to move, and told him so. He did not 
need much urging and was not slow in regaining the 
ground, when he started towards the fence as fast as 
his legs would carry him, but he could not keep pace 
with the large Newfoundland dog, which was not at 
all backward in his actions. Benjamin had his hat 
full of apples and this hindered him not a little, espe- 
cially in climbing over the high fence ; he reached the 
topmost rail and was just swinging his hind foot over 
when the dog got a. warm bite at the bottom of his 
pants, which being rather tight, necessitated great 
care on the part of the dog to avoid injury to the 
flesh, and from Benjamin’s actions, I judged that the 
dog had been a little bit careless, for the old man let 
go of everything except his hat, and tried to drop, but 
he didn’t drop worth a cent. There he hung, his feet 
dangling between heaven and earth, not being able to 
either get down or up, as the dog had his forward 
feet braced against the fence, and having a good hold 
and a comfortable position, did not seem inclined to 
give up either. The cloth in these pants must have 
been made of exceedingly good fiber to so nobly and 


194 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

faithfully support its owner. It was lucky for Benja- 
min that it was not a bulldog, but as it was of a dif- 
ferent variety it did not possess the sticking qualities, 
and when it tried to let go to secure a better hold 
Benjamin improved the opportunity and b}^ a little 
kicking succeeded in extricating himself. But in so 
doing he dropped his apples and ripped his pants. He 
did not mind either, since the dog seemed satisfied and 
started off towards the house, when Benjamin pro- 
ceeded to gather up his green apples and remount his 
cycle. The bosom of his pants presented a very 
ragged appearance and I told him that he would make 
a better showing if he would make a change in that 
particular portion of his wardrobe, but he argued that 
that was no place for a fellow to change his clothes, 
that he could easily hide his defects by keeping his 
seat. We rode along for several miles, Benjamin busy- 
ing himself by eating his green apples, some of which 
he offered me, but having had a little experience with 
unripe fruit when I was young, I declined to become 
a party to his crime, and so that old fool rode along, 
filling himself up on those green apples. 

We intended to stop at Lowell, a large city about 
twentj^-five miles east of Fitchburg, that night, and 
Benjamin, not liking the idea of making his debut in 
his damaged pants, finally took advantage of a friendly 
strip of woods that lay in our way, in which he con- 
cealed himself and changed his toilet. I noticed that 
he sat very lightly on the saddle and I asked him if 
the dog had bitten him, to which he replied that his 


THE NEW WOMAN AS A PHYSICIAN 


195 



There he hung, his feet dangling between heaven and earth.— Page 


193 - 



THE NEW WOPiIAN AS A PHYSICIAN IQ7 

teeth had just grazed the skin, astoi7 which I did not 
believe. 

We wheeled along at a moderate gait and did not 
reach Lowell until about 7 o’clock, when we sought 
out and registered at one of the several first-class ho- 
tels in that busy and beautiful emporium, known all 
over the civilized world through the extensive propa- 
gation of her divers manufactured articles. Being 
tired, we went directly to our room after dispatching 
our supper. 

I noticed that Benjamin did not partake of his even- 
ing meal with his usual relish, and attributed it to his 
eating the apples, and subsequent events proved the 
correctness of my conjectures, for in less than an hour 
after retiring, he commenced to roll and tumble and 
finally said that he was sick. I arose, lighted the gas 
and began to dress, for I had a prett}^ good idea of 
what was to follow. Before I had finished, Benjamin 
doubled up into a bow-knot and commenced groaning 
and howling; his facial contortions were fearful to 
witness, and I knew that the apples were beginning 
to get in their terrible work. While I was not par- 
ticularl}^ alarmed, I felt that something should be done 
to alleviate his pain and to check the disease, and with 
this end in view I went downstairs and told the clerk 
of I^enjamin’s condition. She said that she would 
send for a doctor right away, and I returned to my 
sick husband. In less than ten minutes I heard a 
short, quick rap, and on opening the door saw a young 
woman about twenty-five or thirty years of age stand- 
ing there. She said: “lam the physician whom you 


198 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

sent for.” 1 invited her in and she entered, and throw- 
ing off her head-gear, exposed her face to the light. 
She was a very handsome woman, as perfect a blonde 
as I had ever seen, with large, liquid-like, melting 
blue eyes, and fluffy golden hair. Her figure was tall 
and superbly molded ; taken all in all, she was a reg- 
ular Venus, such as men delight to rave over, and I 
hesitated about introducing her to my addle-headed 
old husband. But something must be done and that 
immediately, for he was howling worse than ever, and 
now engaged in trying to untangle the knots which 
had kept him so busy a short time before in tying up. 

The lady said: “I am Dr. Marion Sanders, at j^our 
service, madam.” I told her that my husband had an 
attack of cholera morbus, and wished her to see what 
she could do for him. 

She approached the bed and took hold of one of 
Benjamin’s hands, and pulling out her watch, com- 
menced to count the beats of his pulse. She finally 
let go of his hand, saying that his pulse was very high 
and unsteady, and fluttered more than the wheat 
market, and from this I inferred that she had gambled 
in stocks and wheat margins. Benjamin stopped his 
groaning as soon as he fairly caught sight of the new 
woman doctor, and made strenuous efforts to keep his 
mouth shut, although it was evident that the pain had 
not yet ceased. 

The doctor then tried to get Benjamin’s tempera- 
ture, and I heard her mutter '‘105.” She finally turned 
away and told me that my husband was a very sick 
man and might not live until morning, as his pulse 


THE NEW WOMAN AS A PHVSICIAN 


199 


was 160 and his temperature 105. She then opened 
her medicine case and proceeded to deal out several 
concoctions, one of which I strongly suspected to be 
brandy, while I knew that another ingredient was 
Jamaica ginger. 

After mixing this potion the doctor advanced to 
Benjamin’s bedside, and handing the glass to him, 
said, Drink.” He grasped the glass and swallowed 
its contents without a word. I had always had great 
difficulty in getting m}^ Benjamin to take medicine, 
no matter how pleasant to the taste, and so had all the 
physicians who had ever attended him ; but the new 
woman physician had no trouble of this kind, and I 
was forced to admit, in my own mind, that she had a 
great advantage over the male fraternity in getting 
their patients to swallow their prescriptions. 

The doctor sat down to watch Benjamin and notice 
the effect of her medicine. She took a chair at his 
bedside and took hold of his hand, an operation which 
I considered entirely superfluous, although that silly 
old Benjamin seemed to be mightily pleased. It was 
soon evident that the new M. D. was growing anxious, 
as she again tried Benjamin’s temperature, after which 
she crossed the room to where I sat, and whispered : 
‘‘Mrs. Jones, I do not wish to frighten you. but really, 
your husband is in a very dangerous condition ; his 
temperature is up to 107 and is going still higher, 
while his pulsations are so rapid that I can hardly 
count them, and must be in the neighborhood of 180. 
The case is a very serious one and whatever is done 
must be done quickly, and I should like to call in a 


200 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

couple of my colleagues and hold a consultation with 
them.” I was beginning to grow frightened also, and 
told her to do as she thought best, as I did not want 
Benjamin to die so far from home, as it would be a 
very expensive matter to get his body back home, 
and the weather was getting so warm that I knew we 
could not keep him long, even on ice. 

The doctor dispatched a servant with a couple of deli- 
cate little notes, and then renewed her efforts to reduce 
Benjamin’s pulse and temperature. In about half an 
hour there was a rap at the door and the doctor ush- 
ered in a couple of women, one of whom was large and 
stout, and the other small and thin. She introduced 
them as Dr. Killem and Dr. Quick. These ladies 
approached the bed and the large one took hold of 
Benjamin’s hand to feel for his pulse, while the little 
one removed and wiped her spectacles and proceeded 
to ascertain what his temperature might be. It was 
evident that both ladies were startled, for they with- 
drew to the farther corner of the room, where the}^ 
held a very animated discussion. I could see that they 
did not agree in their diagnosis of the case ; and finally 
Dr. Killem told Dr. Sanders that she did not know 
what she was talking about, to which the latter replied 
that she did not belong to the old school physicians, 
now so nearly extinct, and that she used the latest and 
best methods in her treatment of patients. Dr. Kil- 
lem said that she did not depend entirely on a receipt 
book for her remedies, but that she had years of ex- 
perience in the profession where the others had but 
months. Dr. Quick now put in a word or two and 


THE NEW WOMAN AS A PHYSICIAN 


201 



Words passed hot and fast between the doctors. — Page 203. 



THE NEW WOMAN AS A PHYSICIAN 2o3 

declared that neither of the others was right, and as 
she had just returned from a course of lectures where 
such diseases had been treated by the very latest and 
most approved pattern of the new woman doctors, she 
ought to know something about the case, and if they 
did not change the medicine the patient would not be 
alive in two hours. 

Benjamin was an animated listener to this powwow, 
and the result was another series of cramps which 
resembled an acrobatic performance. As soon as he 
could speak he called me to his side and said: Bet- 
sey, if what those women s^ is true, then I may as 
well bid farewell to you, send some messages to the 
children and prepare myself for my heavenly flight.” 

“Don’t be in a hurry, Benjamin,” I said soothingly, 
“for I don’t believe any of them know what they are 
talking about.” 

The racket in the corner seemed to be waxing warm, 
for I again heard Dr. Killem’s voice as she said : 
“Dr. Sanders, you depend too much on your good 
looks for patients ; you would be a greater success as 
a crusher than as an M. D.” 

Words passed hot and fast between the doctors, and 
becoming thoroughly disgusted with their jangling, I 
turned and told them that their presence was no longer 
desired and that I would settle with Dr. Sanders in 
the morning; that I wanted my husband to die in 
peace if he was going to die at all. 

I hustled the trio out of the room and again went 
down to the office, where I asked the clerk if there 
was a physician in the city of the masculine sex. She 


204 


BETSliY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


said that there was one, but that he did not have much 
to do. I told her that I did not care what he had to 
do, but that 1 wanted him there as quickly as she 
could get him. She promised to send for him and I 
returned to Benjamin. He had quieted down consid- 
erably since the exodus of the female M. D.’s, and 
seemed a trifle better. 

A few minutes later there came a sharp, heavy rap, 
and when I opened the door a gentleman walked in 
and introduced himself as Dr. Curem. He went over 
and examined Benjamin for a few moments, and when 
I asked him if there was any chance for him, he said : 
‘‘Chance for what?” 

“For him to live,” I said. He laughed outright 
and said that he did not see any chance or probability 
of his dying very soon. 

I told him that Benjamin’s pulse was up to iSoand 
his temperature 107. The doctor looked at me as if 
he thought me crazy, and laughed again. Then I told 
him about the new woman doctors, and he again shook 
his fat sides and laughed. “I can explain all that,” 
he said. “It is a well known fact that when a good 
looking woman, like Dr. Sanders, goes to fooling 
around a man’s pulse it will increase at least fifty pul 
sations a minute. Your husband has had a pretty 
severe attack of cholera morbus, but the worst is now 
over, although I do not consider that he could have 
been dangerously sick at any time.” 

Benjamin said he was mighty glad that he wasn’t 
going to die, for just as likely as not there was an or- 
dinance making it an offense, punishable by boiling 


THE NEW WOMAN AS A PHYSICIAN 


205 


or roasting, especially if the wo’bemen had control of 
the city, and he believed they had. But he believed 
that he was now all right, and didn’t wonder that such 
a combination as Dr. Sanders Killem Quick would 
give a man the jimjams. 

I paid the doctor for his visit and he left Benjamin 
some medicine and departed, after which Benjamin 
gave me to distinctly understand that he did not want 
any more female doctors fooling around him. 


CHAPTER XVI. 


BITTER AND SWEET. 

Soon after Dr. Curem’s departure I again retired 
to rest, as Benjamin had grown quiet and I felt the 
need of all the sleep I could possibly get. I did not 
hear anything from Benjamin until the following 
morning, when he seemed to feel almost as good as 
new. 

Owing to Benjamin’s indisposition we concluded 
not to continue our journey that day, as Dr. Curem 
said he should keep pretty quiet for a day or two. 

About nine o’clock Dr. Sanders called and was 
shown up to our room. She did not appear to be very 
friendly, said that she had called to see about her bill, 
as it never would do to allow a bill against these trav- 
eling people to run for any length of time, if you ever 
expected to collect it. 

I did not like, her manner, but asked her what her 
bill was. She produced a large book and pencil, and 
sitting down at the table, commenced her arithmetical 
calculations, which lasted about twenty minutes, when 
she presented the following account : 

To two professional yisits @ $1.50 - - $3-oo 

“ one prescription - - - - - i.oo 

“ consultation fees - - - - - 5.00 

Total - - - . ':fq.oo 

I handed the bill to Benjamin, who glanced over it, 
206 


BITTER AND SWEET 


207 


and then said: “I am willing to pay for any and all 
good which I have received, but I’ll be hanged if 1 
am anxious to pay for something which I never re- 
ceived. You came very near scaring me to death, and 
I think that I’ll bring in a bill for damages, which 
will more than balance your account, to say nothing 
of your getting up a regular prize fight in my room at 
the dead of night. You must think that I have no 
feeling at all. I will pay you for what medicine I 
had, but I don’t propose to pay for the medical knowl- 
edge which you evidently did not possess. If you 
will cut that bill down to the price of the medicine 
you gave me. I’ll settle with you; otherwise, I will 
stand you a lawsuit before I will pay you a cent.” 

Dr. Sanders cogitated deeply for a time, and finally 
told him that she would take one dollar and give him 
a receipt in full, as bringing the affair into the courts 
would hurt her business more than the other eight 
dollars’ worth. 

She drew up a receipt after a considerable work, 
and signed it. Benjamin told me to give her a dollar 
and pocket the receipt, which I did, and then the 
highly esteemed Dr. Sanders said farewell and left us 
to our own meditations. 

Benjamin broke the silence by saying: “If I ever 
want to commit suicide, I’ll employ one of them new 
women physicians. I feel certain that if those women 
had stayed another half-hour 1 would have been a dead 
man. I tell you, Betsey, it’s invigorating to have two 
or three women stand around and howl : ‘He can’t 
live until morning,’ ‘I wouldn’t be surprised if he 


2o8 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

didn’t live more than a couple of hours,’ ‘If anything 
is done for him, it will have to be done right away. ’ 
This may be all right for old* women who want to 
make people believe that they are awful sick, but it 
will never do for men, and I don’t believe that any 
sensible man in his right mind will ever employ one 
of them the second time.” 

For once, I agreed with my husband, or rather he 
agreed with me, a circumstance which seemed to 
please him not a little. We remained in Lowell all 
that day and Benjamin did not leave the hotel, and 
consequently did not get into trouble. I busied my- 
self in repairing his pants, which had met with such 
hard usage the previous day, and in talking to Benja- 
min about the folly of eating green fruit, and not pay- 
ing any attention to what his wife said. He was quite 
meek, as the cholera had taken about all the fight, 
and some of the meanness, out of him ; although I 
knew that it was only a temporary streak, and that in 
less than a week he would be his ugly old self, with 
a great deal more conceit than sense. , 

I found time during the afternoon to go out and 
look the city over. There were plenty evidences of 
the presence of the new woman, but she had not de- 
veloped to such a high degree here as in Fitchburg, 
Worcester and Northampton. 

Lowell is a beautiful city of about 80,000 inhabit- 
ants, situated in Middlesex County, in the northern 
part of the state, and on the banks of the grand old 
Merrimac River, that flows on down to the sea with- 
out first leaving the state, as I have noticed all the 


BITTER AND SWEET 


209 



I stopped just in time to avoid following Benjamin. Page 213. 



V 




bitter and sweet 


21 1 

other rivers of Massachusetts do ; and at the mouth of 
the Concord River, and enjo3’s the advantages of an 
immense water power from the falls of the Merrimac. 
Here I found a dozen large factories, with thousands 
of looms, weaving miles upon miles of cloth every day, 
^and I wondered if the sheets on my bed at home were 
not made by one of these wonderful machines. Lowell 
is the largest producer of cotton goods in the United 
States. One large cotton goods factory employs a 
capital of $2,500,000 in operating their business. 
There were also extensive carpet mills, woolen mills, 
bunting factories, foundries and machine shops. I saw 
manifestations of thrift and enterprise among the mer- 
chants and professional men and women as well as in 
the manufacturers. 

We left the next morning for Salem, a city of more 
than thirty thousand inhabitants, located about twenty- 
five miles east, on the shores of the big pond, which 
we were both very anxious to see for the first time in 
our lives. Benjamin had nearly recovered his accus- 
tomed good spirits, and whistled as we rode along. 

It was Wednesday morning, the sky was overcast 
with dark clouds, and I felt more than certain that we 
would have a shower before night, and told Benjamin 
so ; but he said he guessed not, that I was always 
croaking and didn’t know anything about the weather. 

About nine o’clock I felt several drops of rain strike 
my sunburned cheeks, and told Benjamin that we had 
better stop at the next farm house until the shower was 
over. He said that it would not rain, although we 
might get an occasional drop or two, and we did, or 


212 BETSEY JANE ON THE 'SKW WOMAN 

at least Benjamin got a drop, and I had a narrow 
escape myself. We were just opposite a comfortable 
looking farm house, and the homelike appearance of 
the place was very enticing to me : the old house 
seemed to say,“ Come and take shelter under my roof. ” 
I urged Benjamin to stop there and await develop- 
ments, but he would not listen to me, and we pushed 
on. We had not proceeded more than half a mile 
when there came a terrible crash, as if the artillery of 
heaven had opened up a brisk cannonade, which was 
continued without interruption for several minutes, 
and then the rain began to descend in torrents, wetting 
us to the skin. I wanted to turn back and seek shelter 
at the house which we had just passed, but Benjamin 
would not hear to it, and said that we had lost too 
much time already, and that if we ever expected to 
get anywhere, we would have to keep moving, and 
we did move, although not very rapidly, as a bicycle 
is not very well calculated for navigation, and in less 
than five minutes the road resembled a small river, 
and the many creeks with which the country abounds 
were converted into turbulent rivers. Our wheels 
would slip and slide, and more than once we were 
compelled to dismount suddenly to save ourselves from 
getting a heavy fall. 

We rode along in this uncomfortable manner, the 
rain still falling in torrents, and the lightning playing 
about us in such a manner as to frighten even the in- 
domitable Benjamin, for about fifteen minutes. The 
farther we went the worse the road grew, until it was 
only occasionally that we could see the roadbed, for 


bitti-:r and sweet 


213 

the water covered it to a depth of six to eight inches 
in some places. Benjamin was taking the lead, as he 
said that he could swim, an accomplishment of which 
I could not boast, and I thought it the proper thing 
for him to take the lead, as he might be able to “swim 
out, O’Grad}^” in case of an accident. Presently we 
approached a creek that crossed Our road, and if there 
was a bridge it was submerged from view. I heard 
a yell from Benjamin and looked up just in time to 
see him throw his hands into the air and disappear 
from sight. 

As we afterward learned, the bridge had been 
washed out, and Benjamin had ridden into the place 
where the bridge should have been. The water must 
have been at least ten feet in depth, and it was well 
for my husband that he could swim, as he undoubtedly 
owes his life to that fact. I stopped just in time to 
avoid following Benjamin^ who had risen to the sur- 
face and was floating rapidly down-stream. He held 
to his machine with one hand while he paddled with 
the other ; he floated down with the current for fifteen 
or twenty rods, when he succeeded in once more get- 
ting his feet, not on dry, but on tolerably soft mud. 
and Anally dragged himself and his wheel to a spot 
where the water was not more than two feet in depth. 
He then splashed back to the road, where I was stand- 
ing in water almost knee deep. Putting his cycle 
over the fence, he climbed over himself and waded 
through something like four feet of water, which filled 
the ditch on the side of the turnpike road, and again 
joined me. 


214 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

“Well, Benjamin,” I said, “have you been on a 
voyage of discovery, or just taking a bath for your 
health ? I told you that you would get a drop or two, 
and I imagine that you took quite a drop when you 
went into that river ; you look real pretty ; how do 
you feel?” 

“I feel as you look; like a darned fool,” retorted 
my amiable and water-logged husband, wickedly. 

I paid no attention to his remark, merely asked him 
if he intended to camp there for the balance of the 
day, swim the creek again, or turn back to the farm 
house where I wanted to stop when we came past it. 

He said that he could easily swim the creek again, 
in fact he believed he could swim the Atlantic, but 
doubted my ability to follow him. Said a woman could 
get along very well under the most favorable circum- 
stances, but they weren’t in it when difficulties con- 
fronted them. I told him that the women had suc- 
ceeded in matching him pretty well so far, in fact they 
had surmounted him as well as great difficulties. But 
it was no time or place for an extended argument and 
I told him that I was going to return to the farm 
hoi^se, and if he thought himself a Noah, to go on 
with his ark ; that I preferred to wait until the deluge 
was over and the weather had settled. 

We turned back, and by a combination of riding 
and walking, managed to reach the farm house alluded 
to at about ten o’clock a. m. We must have been a 
sorry looking pair as we walked into the farmer’s 
yard, ti undling our wheels along, and it is no wonder 


BITTER AND SWEET 21^ 

that the children drew back from the windows with 
scared looks. 

The farmer’s wife, who came to the door, seemed 
to take in the situation at a glance, for she told us to 
come in and get warm, before we had a chance to say 
a word. She ushered us into the kitchen, where there 
was a good fire, and as Benjamin had brought in our 
waterproof valises, we asked if we could retire to 
make a change in our toilets, a request which was 
immediately granted, and in less than fifteen minutes 
we were arrayed in dry clothing once more, and again 
seated by the kitchen fire. There is always some- 
thing inviting in a good old-fashioned cook stove, and 
I never enjoy myself better than sitting by a cheerful 
kitchen fire, especially when the weather is damp and 
chilly ; it is so home-like, and reminds one of the good 
old days before everything had run to parlors with 
their brussels carpets and stuffed chairs, with the heat 
corked up in iron pipes or shot up through a hole in 
the floor. 

The farmer’s wife busied herself in preparing a 
warm dinner, and I could see that she was making 
extra exertions on our account, and * I told her not to 
do so. I asked her if there wasn’t something that I 
could do to help her, but she assured me that my as- 
sistance was not needed. She was a very nice, lady- 
like woman, one of the old school, with none of the 
peculiarities which so distinguish the new woman, but 
I confess that the change was an agreeable one to me, 
and I knew that it was also highly appreciated by my 
husband. 


2i6 BETSEY jane on the new woman 

After partaking of a first-class meal, of which we 
ate heartily, for we were both nearly famished after 
our soaking, we were invited into the sitting room, 
where one of the daughters entertained us with some 
very fine piano music ; she was also one of the old- 
fashioned girls, quiet and ladylike, and free from all 
affectation, which was very refreshing after having 
seen none but the new girls and new women since our 
departure from home. 

The head of the family, for such the husband really 
was, was a large, fine looking man about forty-five 
years of age; genial, pleasant and intelligent. • He and 
Benjamin soon engaged in an animated conversation, 
which finally drifted into a talk on the new woman, 
and the farmer expressed a disgust and antipathy for 
them which corresponded exactly with myown views 
on the subject. He said that when he reached so low 
a level as to submit to petticoat government, he would 
pack his belongings in a pocket handkerchief and 
leave the countiy, and never stop until he reached a 
land where the new woman was unknown, and that 
he considered it the fault of the men that the new 
woman existed ; for if they would all show a little 
grit, and sit down on her in the way she deserved, 
instead of submitting to her whims, she would soon 
become discouraged and give up the fight ; but just 
as long as men gave up their inherent rights, which 
dated back to Adam’s time, and allowed themselves 
to be bossed and dictated to by woman, they could 
expect nothing else than the present system of domes^ 
tic tyranny, 


liITTKR AND SWEET 


217 


He said, further, that woman in her proper sphere 
was a lovable creature, but when she unsexed herself 
by trying to ape man and his many vices and weak- 
nesses, she made a sad failure of it. Woman is an 
extremist and capable of reaching a higher moral alti- 
tude, or of finding a lower one than it is possible for man 
to sink to. She is the refiner, the polisher, who can add 
luster to man’s stronger and coarser nature, and thus 
purify, refine and polish his character; but when she 
attempts to take his place, and furnish both the strength 
and the polish, she is entirely out of her element, as 
she will lose the polish and refinement of her sex, and 
can never hope to attain the same strength and coarse- 
ness of fiber which characterize the average man. A 
woman, that is, a true one, naturally looks up to and 
respects her husband, and in so doing she is simply 
obeying one of the divine laws of her Creator, and un- 
less she can do this, she will learn to despise and even 
hate the man to whom she is bound by a legal, not a 
natural tie, a tie stronger than any earthly bond ; for 
woman invariably despises effeminate men, and men 
should so conduct themselves as to win both the re- 
spect and love of their wives and daughters. When 
they do this, there will be no earthly use in trying to 
make a new woman out of her. “I will give any and 
all of these new women an opportunity to make con- 
verts out of my wife and daughters, and just let them 
try to convince them that their husband and father is 
not fit to be the head of the family and to take all the 
responsibility and care for their welfare on his hands, 
and there will be war right away, won’t there, Mary r” 


2i8 BETSEY JANP: ON THE NEW WOMAN 

And he looked at his wife and smiled approvingly and 
nodded an affirmative. 

I now took occasion to remark to the farmer, whose 
name was Curtis, that judging from my own stand- 
point, as a woman, he was correct in his remarks, and 
that if more of the men had his good sense and firm- 
ness, the new woman craze would soon play out. 

Mrs. Curtis said: “If every woman had a husband 
like mine, she would not want a change of adminis- 
tration, and for my own part, I would not exchange 
places with the best of the new women, for now I 
know that I have not only the love and respect of 'my 
husband and children, but also the respect of all sen- 
sible and right-minded people who know us, not even 
excepting the new women who are really acquainted 
with myself and family; as,only the other day, one of 
them who has lived with a drunken husband for thirty 
odd years, said: ‘Mrs. Curtis, if my husband was like 
yours I would not be advocating emancipation, as 
there would be no bonds to break, except those of 
love, and no true woman ever cares to break them, as 
it is her nature to desire love and care, and not assume 
all of the duties and responsibilities of life which 
should devolve upon the stronger nature and physical 
strength of man.’” 

I then related some of our experiences with the new 
woman since we had started on our trip, which seemed 
to greatly amuse the farmer’s family; and so the 
evening passed, in pleasant conversation, and for the 
first time since leaving home we retired to bed with- 


BITTER AND SWEET 2I9 

out a single disagreeable thought concerning the new 
woman, who was conspicuous for her absence. 

The big storm had passed away during the night, 
and the sun shone out of a clear sky the next morning, 
when we prepared to resume our journey. The good 
farmer offered to take us to Salem in his wagon, as he 
said he would be compelled to go there on business ; 
and as the roads were too muddy for good wheeling, 
we gladly accepted his offer. 

The floods had subsided and we experienced no 
difficulty on the road, except at the place where Ben- 
jamin took his drop the day before, and here we were 
compelled to ford the creek. We arrived in Salem 
about noon and dismounted at a large hotel, which 
Mr, Curtis recommended to us ; and after bidding our 
host good-bye and again thanking him for his kind- 
ness, we parted company. 


CHAPTER XVII. 


BBTSEY JANE ON THE PLATFORM. 

We found ourselves located in a very neat and re- 
spectable house, with all the conveniences any reason- 
able person could exact. 

As soon as we had dispatched our dinners, Ben- 
jamin began to tease to go out and see the town ; he 
was anxious to gaze upon the broad Atlantic. Said 
he had never been so near salt water before — although 
he had dreamed many times of swimming up Salt 
Creek — and he was impatient to see the mighty deep, 
over whose waves his forefathers had paddled their 
way to this beautiful land of the brave and the free 
(free, if you are lucky enough not to get hitched up 
to a new woman) so many years before. As I had 
nothing in particular to do, I consented to accompany 
him on a tour of the city and down to the seashore. 

We found Salem to be a substantially built city, a 
port of entry about fourteen miles northeast of Bos- 
ton, and one of the oldest towns in the state. It had 
formerly enjoyed a very large foreign commerce, 
which of late j^’ears had drifted elsewhere ; its coast 
trade, however, was still extensive, ice and coal being 
its chief exports. Cotton goods are also manufactured 
extensively here, as is white lead, jute and cordage. 
Salem is famous for its Essex Institute, the Peabody 
Academy of Science, the East India Marine Mall, with 
220 


BETSEY JANE ON TIIIC ri-ATFORM 


221 



There he stood, with his hands clinched behind h.is back.— Page 223 



BETSEY JANE ON THE PLATB’ORM 22;^ 

a large and valuable museum and a State Normal 
School for girls, not particularly for new girls, but 
just plain girls. 

After walking about for an hour, during which time 
we had engaged in conversation with several of the 
citizens, from whom I gleaned the above facts regard- 
ing the city and its institutions, we came to the wharfs, 
and Benjamin suddenly stopped and gazed in open- 
mouthed wonder and admiration at the new and won- 
derful sights that met his vision. There he stood, with 
his hands clinched behind his back, and staring, hrst 
up at the thousands of masts that were sticking up 
from the acres of ships that were moored in that old 
harbor, and resembled a forest of majestic trees that 
had been stripped of their foliage and bark, and then 
out on the trackless waste of water. I jogged him in 
the short ribs with my thumb and told him to move 
on, or they would take him for a greenhorn ; but I 
could not move him from his reverie. He noticed, the 
sailors climbing up and down the tall masts as they 
went about their elevating duties, and observed that 
it was an occupation that he did not think the new 
woman was likely to crowd herself into. 

“Come, Betsey,” said Benjamin, “let’s move up 
stream a little and see the place where our grand- 
daddies swam ashore. See! By Jove, I believe that’s 
the very rock up yonder, where they first struck land. 

I never expected to live to see this,. Betsey. Come, I 
must knock off a piece of that old rock and take it 
home to show to the children.” 

“Nonsense, Benjamin,” said I, “that is not Plym- 


lil'jTfiJiV JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

outh Rock. The place where the Pilgrims claim to 
have landed is as far the other side of Boston as we 
are this side. Come, I am tired and must have some 
rest, for I want to go and hear that lady lecture this 
evening.” 

I had noticed that the new woman had not gained 
as strong a foothold in Salem as in the other cities 
through which I had passed, but large posters were 
freely displayed advertising a noted lecturer who 
would address the citizens of that city that very night, 
on emancipation, and a large audience was expected 
to be present. I determined to be one who would 
hear that bright and shining light of the female suffra- 
gists, and told Benjamin that I must have rest in order 
to save my strength for the occasion. 

He said I might go if I wished, but as for him, he 
would never step his foot inside of a place where a 
new woman was to lecture. Said if a new woman 
ever talked emancipation to him she would have to 
run faster than he could. He was not ready to return 
to the hotel yet; said he wasn’t going to shut himself 
up in a box when there was so much to be seen out- 
doors. 

I linally decided to leave him to enjoy the sights, 
but made him promise not to go near the water, and 
keep his mouth shut and mind his own business. But 
I was- almost certain that he would find some way to 
get himself into a scrape in less than live minutes after 
I left him. 

I returned to my room and slept until supper time, 
when I was aroused by the ringing of a big gong. 


BliTSlCV JAXK ON TllB PI.ATKORM 22 ^ 

Benjamin had not yet arrived, but I was not deeply 
concerned for him, as he had warned me that he was 
liable to be a little late in getting in. I went to the 
dining room alone, and was seated at a table opposite 
a woman whose appearance was such as to attract my 
attention. She was about thirty years of age, with 
dark hair and eyes. As she. wore her hair short and 
parted on the side, I concluded, and rightly too, that 
she was one of the new women. She was cool and 
collected. and did not deign to notice any of her neigh- 
bors except by an occasional stare or a passing glance. 
She was attired in a ver}’ neat and closely fitting dress, 
which set off her elegant figure to the best possible 
advantage. There was a noticeable absence of jewehw 
of all kinds, unless I except a watch, which was at- 
tached to a plain cord. The lady; as I was told by 
one of the waiters, was the one who was to deliver 
the lecture that evening. 

After supper I went to my room and sat down to 
await the arrival of the appointed hour for the lecture 
and my husband. The first-named came before I was 
really aware of the fact, but Benjamin was still at 
large in a strange city and it was now getting dark. 
I proceeded to adjust my hat and prepare to go to the 
lecture, as I knew that I could be of no service to 
Benjamin, even if he were in the direst of trouble. 

On reaching the hall 1 found the place crowded, 
but succeeded in getting a seat near the front, where 
I could hear everything that was said. 

The lecturer soon made her appearance, and was 
dressed as plainly as when I saw her at the supper 


226 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

table. She spoke in a clear and decided manner, which 
indicated that she had given her subject no little 
thought and study. As I cannot give the lecture 
verbatim, I will only give a few of the most promi- 
nent extracts. 

Promptly at 8 o’clock, Dr. Susan D. Anderson 
stepped briskly to the front of the rostrum and ad- 
dressed the audience in something like the following 
words : 

“Friends, Fellow Citizens and Sister Emancipators : 
I am here this evening to represent poor, downtrodden 
and defenseless woman, and shall endeavor to show 
you why true and noble women should rise to their 
feet and cast off the shackles with which they have 
been bound for more than six thousand years. 

“Woman has been the slave and plaything of man 
for ages, and as far back as we can find anything like 
written history — and even legendary history confirms 
the Scriptural account — woman has been made sub- 
servient to man’s whims and passions. In spite of the 
bondage to which she has been subjected, woman has 
risen by superior intellect and application, until now, 
she occupies the premier position. Man, in his blind 
and egotistical selfishness and conceit, has allowed her 
to pass out and beyond his power of jurisdiction. He 
has neglected to keep up the bars of ignorance and 
superstition which for so many generations kept poor 
deluded woman in the background. 

“Our free schools and other institutions of learning, 
which have of late years been open to women, have 
done their work thoroughly and effectually, and to- 


BETSEY JANE ON THE PLATFORM 22 ^ 

day man finds himself the inferior creature which he 
would make woman. But thanks to natural intelli- 
gence, energy and application, we are at last free,” 
(loud applause from the women), ^‘and now woman 
stands forth in all the brilliancy and might of her 
superior mind, and places man where he has, by dint 
of a higher intelligence, placed all the lower animals, 
and now man may, for the first time, be said to be 
beneath the chariot wheels of the sex over whom he 
has so long tyrannized.” 

Here the speaker was met with rounds of applause 
from the ladies present, but I did not echo their senti- 
ments and gave no sign of a joy which I did not feel. 

Dr. Susan continued : “Woman has demonstrated, 
clearly and conclusively, that she can fill the higher 
walks of life,’ including the professions, quite as well, 
and in manj^ instances even better, than the so-called 
‘Lords of Creation,’ and although she has had but 
comparatively few years’ experience in these fields, it 
is more than safe to presume that as the years roll on, 
she will gradually improve and bring all of those 
higher professions to a higher state of perfection than 
man has ever been able to do. 

“Man’s is the coarser, grosser nature of the two, 
and according to the laws of nature, which are simply 
those of the Being who is said to govern the universe, 
she must, in course of time, rise to the top, leaving 
the coarser and less valuable metal at the bottom. 
Woman is the relined, purified gold, and in rising 
above man we are simply fulfilling our destiny, which 
was foreshadowed when the human race was first 


228 


bp:tsey jane on the new woman 


created, and we can no more avoid doing that than 
can those who have been destined to carry out the 
plans of God, prevent traveling in the track which 
has been marked out for them. 

‘‘It is hardly worth while for me to enter into any- 
thing like an argumentative talk as to the superiorit}^ 
of woman, although I should like to prove to you, 
that so far, woman has more than held her own in 
any and all vocations where superior mentality is re- 
quired. It is well known that girls mature earlier than 
boys, both physically and mentally, and even man, 
when in the height and glory of his power, tacitly ad- 
mitted this, when he made the age of eighteen a legal 
one for girls, and placed that of boys at twenty-one, 
and there is certainly more than three years’ difference 
in their development. This is due to the fact that 
girls are so much more endowed with intellect that 
they know as much or more at eighteen than do boys 
at twenty-one, and it is but fair to presume that their 
physical development keeps pace with their intellectual 
growth. 

“Who graduate from our public schools, the boys 
or the girls ? Of course some of the boys manage to 
hnish the prescribed course, but they are a vast min- 
ority. Who takes the class honors in nearly every 
school in our great land ? I can assure you that it is 
not our boys, but the less intelligent and inferior sex, 
as the men are pleased to call their daughters and sis- 
ters. In college, our girls put their masculine com- 
petitors to shame by the comparatively easy manner 
in which they outstrip them, and even later in life, 


BETSEY JANE ON THE PT.ATFORM 


229 


when engaged in the practice of the professions, the 
weaker sex stand preeminent, and it is onlj- a question 
of time until man will be compelled, b}’ a too strong 
competition, to abandon the professions entirely.” 

Here there was more applause, and the speaker 
took advantage of the racket to indulge in a glass of 
water, and to remove and wipe her eyeglasses, which 
she again carefully adjusted on her nose. Then she 
went on with her harangue, saying : 

•Ht is useless to prolong this argument, as the facts 
are already too well known to require repetition, and 
I have only alluded to them in order to convince the 
male persuasion that 1 fully understand the situation 
and realize the advantage which we, as a sex, possess 
over them. Our rise and progress is simply a repeti- 
tion of the fable of the tortoise and the hare ; we have 
been moving right along while the men were sleep- 
ing. We have been working and studying while the 
men were occupied in standing about the streets, talk- 
ing politics, chewing tobacco and whittling, or carous- 
ing in the saloons. The result of their foolishness and 
our industry has for years been a foregone conclusion, 
and now that the tables are being reversed, it causes 
man to weep and gnash his teeth at his own impotence. 

‘Tt is my purpose to organize a society in this, your 
beautiful city, to appoint officers, call elections and 
map out the work for your society. When this is 
done, I shall leave Salem with the firm conviction that 
you will be able to carry on the work which I am now 
beginning.” 

At this the applause was deafening, and the speaker 


230 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOxMAN 

was compelled to place her hands over her ears, but 
she quickl}' rallied, and stepping forward, she said : 

‘'1 will now give an opportunity for any person 
present, to gainsay or refute anything which I have 
said this evening.” 

P"or about two minutes there was an unbroken 
silence, when I rose to my feet, and asked Dr. Susan 
if she would allow me to make a few remarks, to 
which she replied in the affirmative. I then walked 
forward to the rostrum, and a couple of gentlemen 
who were sitting near assisted me in mounting the 
platform. 1 faced the audience, and said : 

Ladies and gentlemen: I am not an orator, and 
neither am I a lecturer ; I am a stranger traveling- 
through your cit}', and do not hope or expect to elec- 
trify you with my eloquence. I have no well arranged 
or written remarks to make, but want to tell you what 
I know and think about the new woman and her so- 
called great work of emancipation. 

‘‘For several days past I have been traveling 
through a country where the new woman holds almost 
undisputed sway ; therefore I have had a very good 
opportunity to see and hear her in her new role, and 
so far I have seen and heard nothing which would 
tend to convince me that she is a success in her mis- 
sion of emancipation. I have visited and been enter- 
tained in what were once happj' homes; but alas! 
this can not truthfully be said of them now, for while 
admitting, for the sake of argument, that the new 
woman is a partial success, the same cannot be said 
of the new man, for he is certainly a failure at the 


BETSEY JANE ON THE PLATFORM 


23 f 





/ 





\ 


\ 


BETSEY JANE ON THE PLATFORM 233 

management of domestic affairs. I have visited homes 
where the new woman was the undisputed head of the 
family, where she wielded the ruler’s rod with all the 
limitless power of the crowned despot, and so far I 
have failed to observe the slightest improvement over 
the former regime, and in fact, I think that the results 
are even more undesirable than those achieved under 
the former method. 

“I have employed the services of the new woman 
in a professional way, and here she was even a greater 
failure than in the former instances, as I was compelled 
to dismiss her and call upon one of the old-fashioned 
men for assistance. I have seen the new woman try- 
ing to 111! nearly all the trades and professions which 
have been so successfully filled by men, and as far as 
my knowledge and judgment goes, she was far from 
being a success in any of them. 

‘•It is possible, that in generations to come, woman 
may so far succeed in unsexing herself and in imitating 
man, as to become a practical success, for, as her 
womanly qualities and virtues disappear, it is proba- 
ble that something coarser and more undesirable may 
take their place, under the principle that nature abhors 
a vacuum. 

“What the speaker has said in regard to the pre- 
cocity of our sex, is undoubtedly true, for women cer- 
tainly mature earlier than men ; but if we draw our 
deductions from natural laws we will observe that this 
is an argument against rather than for the superiority 
of the new woman. For example: Animals which 
mature the most rapidly seldom if ever possess the 


234 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

strength and longevity of those of slower develop- 
ment ; as the elephant is of slow growth, but reaches 
a great age, and for strength and intelligence has no 
peer among the lower animals. I might go on in- 
definitely in drawing comparisons and illustrations, 
but will forbear. 

“What is true of animal life in regard to early ma- 
turity, is also true of plant life, as it is well known 
that all hard, strong and tough wood is of very slow 
growth, while on the other hand the trees which grow 
and mature with the greatest rapidity are of the soft- 
est, weakest and most porous quality. Figuring on this 
basis, woman’s early development means nothing in 
her favor, and the less said about it, the better for the 
emancipators. 

“In regard to superior intellect allow me to say that 
I differ slightly with the lady who has preceded me, 
for while I am glad to admit that there is something 
like an equality, I do not believe that there is any 
superiority in favor of our sex. Had the lady said 
that we possessed more energy, patience and applica- 
tion, I would not contradict her statement. Men and 
boys, through superior physical strength, expect to 
move the earth in a single effort, while woman, like 
the tortoise in the fable of the hare, knows her weak- 
ness and consequent inferiority, and knowing this, 
fully comprehends the necessity of hard and constant 
labor, and in order to compete with her stronger adver- 
sary she applies herself more thoroughly, and in so do- 
ing, cultivates habits of industry to such a degree that 
she can make a comparatively good showing, and this 


BETSEY JANl<: ON Till-: PLATFORM 235 

fact leads many unthinking women to believe in the 
great superiority of her sex, when in reality it is nothing 
of the sort. Take it for granted that a woman possesses 
the same natural brain power as a man, but lacks his 
physical strength ; place them on an equality in col- 
lege, give each the same amount of energy, ambition 
and application, and at the end of the school year the 
man or boy should be far ahead of his less fortunate 
sister, who, not having the constitution and surplus 
strength upon which to draw, must in the long run 
be outstripped simply because she has not the physical 
power to sustain her intellect. 

In my humble opinion, man has the greater strength 
of both mind and body, and l:)oth are of a coarser liber 
than those of woman. Woman’s mind is finer and sus- 
ceptible of a higher polish than man’s; her percep- 
tions are quicker and keener, but her thinking power 
is not so great, for it is well known that mathematics 
require the greatest mental powers of any of the 
studies, and here is where man excels, for ’tis seldom 
that we find girls or young women who can hold their 
own on this line. On the other hand, it is true that 
few of the male sex can learn language, history and 
other studies which require a quick perception and a 
strong memory, with as great ease as the opposite sex. 

“ But let us ask ourselves : Is the feminization of 
the world a desirable thing for the welfare of our 
future ? 

“Are you going to make a race of men on feminine 
fodder ? 

“Is it not a peculiar spectacle you new women pre- 


236 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

sent when you try to imitate man and at the same time 
trample him under your feet ? 

•‘How will you new women feel when the men all 
turn from you with scorn, and your daughters are 
shunned with shame by your sons, who will see noth- 
ing in the creature to love or respect? 

“A woman that don’t care for a man to hold her 
bouquet, open and close the door for her, button her 
gloves, assist her in and out of carriages, steady her 
wheel while she learns to ride the frisky machine, 
rush to pick her up when she falls, and tell her that 
she is pretty, that he never saw a woman like her be- 
fore, isn’t a woman at all, and I object to her calling 
herself one. 

“But the gentlemen should not get discouraged, for 
with all her new and visionary notions, woman likes 
man best of all things in this world, but to be a man 
one must be virile, forceful, compelling, a solid rock 
of dependence, a substantial, unfeminine being. But 
if these women emancipators succeed in feminizing 
the world and reducing you men to a dependent and 
negative plane, I don’t believe she will then see any- 
thing in you to love. 

“Throwing all argument aside, I do not believe that 
either was calculated to stand alone on his or her 
merits, and I believe that a Divine Creator intended 
that they should become as one, and that the two are 
required to form anything like a perfect mental bal- 
ance ; that each is superior in certain things, but that 
neither is superior in all things.” 

I thought that I had said enough, perhaps too much, 
and closed my remarks by saying : 


BETSEY JANE ON THE PLATFORM 237 

‘'Now in conclusion, allow me to say to the ladies 
of Salem ; Do not allow yourselves to be deluded 
into thinking that you are the salt of the earth, and 
try to revolutionize your homes into places of torment, 
for if you do, take my word for it, the time will come 
when you will most bitterlj' regret your imbecility. 
While personally I have naught against the lady who 
has addressed you in such an able manner this even- 
ing, I cannot, as a consistent American wife and 
mother, for such I am, uphold her views, which I 
believe to be entirely erroneous.” 

I thanked the audience for their kind attention and 
descended from the platform amidst loud and pro- 
longed applause, principally from the gentlemen, 
although a few of the ladies seemed to echo my sen- 
timents. 

Dr. Susan then took the floor and made some re- 
marks about people who lived away back in the dark 
ages, and had no spirit of progression in their bodies. 
She said that it would not be worth while to try to 
disprove the statements which I had made, as it was 
getting late, and all right-minded emancipators would 
not allow themselves to be thus hoodwinked, but 
would rise in their might and throw off the bondage 
of ages. 

She appointed a time and place of meeting for the 
afternoon of the following day, the object of which 
was to organize a society for the propagation of the 
“wo’bemen,” as Benjamin called the new woman, 
and I now considered that a very good title for those 
females who want to wear the men’s breeches and run 
things outdoors as well as in. 


CHAPTER XVIII. 


GIVE THE MEN A CHANCE. 

I RETURNED to the hotel after the lecture, and at 
once retired to my room, where I found Benjamin 
fast asleep, or more properly speaking, in a drunken 
stupor. I was shocked ; he hadn’t drank a drop since 
he got religion and joined the church, which ^hap- 
pened soon after we were married. 

He was lying on his back, snoring lustily, and fairly 
making the windows rattle with his stentorian breath- 
ing. He had his mouth wide open, and the smell of 
liquor was enough to stagger a hog fattened on dis- 
tillery slops. I knew that I could not stand either the 
fumes of the alcohol or the terrible snoring, and woke 
him up after considerable hard work. I had to shake 
him and pull his ears, as he had no hair worth speak- 
ing of. At last my efforts were crowned with success, 
and he rolled over and grunted a couple of times, and 
then asked what in thunder I wanted, and what I 
meant by waking him up at that hour of the night. 

I told him that I did not want much, just a little 
talk with him and an explanation of his afternoon’s 
performances. 

Like all drunken men, he was anything but reason- 
able, and declined either to talk or to give an expla- 
nation. 

“You are a nice man, aren’t you?” I said sarcastic- 
238 


GIVE THE MEN A CHANCE 


239 



I held a small hand mirror before his red and swollen eyes.-Page 241. 



i 



HUSl ’ 



GIVE THE MEN A CHANCE 


241 


ally. ‘‘You are an ornament to society and the Bap- 
tist Church, a prett}' deacon, and a father and a hus- 
band to be proud of. I should like to have your 
photograph to present to Eldef Toots and his congre- 
gation. What a fine picture it would make, life-size, 
and done in India ink or crayon ! for then they could 
show up your bunged eyes and your busted bugle to 
perfection, to say nothing of those pouting rosy lips, 
which would put a native-born Ethiopian to shame. 
Just look at yourself, you old blatherskite,” and I 
held a small hand mirror before his red and swollen 
eyes. 

He took one look, and then, with a howl that would 
have been a credit to a Comanche Indian, leaped 
out of bed, but in his haste and excitement, got his 
feet tangled in the bedclothes, and instead of alight- 
ing in a perpendicular position, he came down on his 
back in a way which threatened the total demolition 
of the entire establishment. 

Benjamin picked himself up with some little care 
and a considerable difficulty, and sat down on the edge 
of the bed. 

“Now what do you want, Betsey?” he said. 

“I want you to tell me what happened to you this 
afternoon, and why you came back in such a besotted 
condition.” 

“I wasn’t ’toxicated, just had a little fun with the 
boys and ran up against one of them blarsted wo’be- 
men, that’s all there was of it.” 

“No, that isn’t all there was of it, nor all there is 
going to be of it;” I said savagely, and shook his 


242 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

shoulders in a way that made his back teeth rattle. 
He was frightened and told me to keep my hands off 
him, but I kept right on shaking him until he was 
fairly awake. 

“Go on with that explanation,” I said again, “and 
be pretty lively about it too, for I don’t want to sit up 
here all night to hear it.” 

Benjamin was conquered, and knowing that the 
sooner he got through with the narrative the quicker 
he would have a chance to sleep, made a virtue of 
necessity, and told me the following story : 

“You see, Betsey, after you left me I set out to do 
the town, and I had not gone far when I met a fellow 
who said that he had an uncle living in Greenfield, 
and when I questioned him, he said that he was from 
Vermont himself, but had lived here for about twentj'- 
five years. We got along amazingly fora while, when 
he proposed that we step in and take a swim. I didn’t 
catch on at first and told him that I had enjoyed a 
swim the day before and didn’t care to repeat the 
operation so soon. He laughed, and clapping his 
hand on my shoulder, said that he scarcely ever took 
a drink himself, only when he met with an old chum, 
and that it never hurt him a mite. Said he used to 
drink pretty heavy when he was young — hie, hie — and 
I— I 1—” 

“Wake up here, you old sleepy head, and finish 
your story, or I will throw you out of the window,” 
said I. 

“Yes, yes, and I told him how I used to get a little 
full occasionally before I joined church, and w'hat fun 


GIVE THE MEx\ A CHANCE 


M3 

1 used to have when I was about two sheets in the 
wind, and then he told me a lot of his experience, and 
linally we concluded to go and take a drink, just to 
see whether the liquor they make nowadays is as good 
as that which was in use when we were boys. 

“Well, we went in and took a drink and after a 
while we took another, and then my new friend pro- 
posed that we do the town, take in all the saloons, and 
like a darned fool, consented and we started in to 
drink the town dry, but you might as well try to drink 
th^t old ocean dry. We got along all right for a little 
while, when my head began to sing and I concluded 
that I owned the whole darned town. Then the trouble 
began ; we had been in about a dozen places and were 
looking for more. 

“I heard somebody talking in a pretty loud tone of 
voice, and we walked in the direction of the voice, 
and soon saw one of them wo’bemen standing on a 
dry goods box ; she had a guitar and played and sang 
a couple of songs, and then commenced to sell Yankee 
notions and patent medicines, lead pencils, writing 
paper, combs, hairpins, etc. We stood and listened 
awhile, and then the smart street fakir spied me, and 
she could see that I had been drinking, I guess — ” 

“Most likely she could,” I retorted. “A blind and 
deaf and dumb person could see that, or smell it rather, 
if they got within half a mile of you.” 

“Look here, Betsey,” said Benjamin, “are you 
telling this story or am- 1?” 

“You can finish it,” I said, and he proceeded: 

“The new woman said: ‘Come up here, old hay- 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


244 

seed, and buy something for your wife and children, 
instead of spending all your money for poor whisky.’ 
The crowd laughed, which made me mad, and my 
friend said: T wouldn’t stand that sort of talk, Jones; 
I’d slap her mouth for her.’ I didn’t say anything 
for a few minutes, and neither did 1 buy anything. 
After 1 had been standing there about lifteen minutes, 
the female made another drive at me, by saying: ‘See 
that drunken old owl over there, nodding and blinking 
as if he thought that he knew something.’ I was 
madder than ever, and before 1 knew what I was do- 
ing 1 rushed up and grabbed her by the leg, just 
between her pants and shoe tops, and gave her a jerk 
which upset her, the box and all the merchandise, 
saying : ‘ Come down off your j)erch and give the men 

a chanced Well, she did. come down and so did I, 
for that woman was stouter than an ox, and I was 
awfully grogg}’ on my feet. She smashed a box of 
soap over my head, swiped me across the mouth with 
her guitar, smashing the instrument all to flinders and 
knocking me down. 1 got up and made a rush at her, 
and managed to get a good hold of her frizzes, when 
she punched me in the stomach so hard that I felt sick 
and wanted to heave up Jonah right then and there, 
but I didn’t, although I let go of her hair and clapped 
both hands on my stomach. 

“The crowd went wild with excitement and shouted : 
‘Give it to him, old girl!’ ‘Smash his snoot for him!’ 
‘Paste him in the gob!’ and a lot more things which 
were not at all polite. That blarsted female took 
them at their word, and come for me like a cyclone ; 


GIVE THE MEN A CHANCE 


24s 




GIVE THE MEN A CHANCE 247 

she pasted my nose with a box of corn salve, and 
batted me over the eye with a bottle of pain killer, 
which didn’t have the prescribed effect, as the pain 
kept right on increasing after the application, and 
then I never did have any corns on my nose. The 
enraged Amazon did not let up after she had knocked 
me down the second tijne, but amused herself by pro- 
ceeding to kick the stuffing out of me. I staggered 
to my feet at last, after she had torn my clothes nearly 
all off my back, and when I tried to run away she 
grabbed a handful of hair — ” 

“I should like to know how she did that,” I inter- 
rupted. 

“It don’t matter how, but she did it all the same, 
and I got out of there as fast as my legs would carry 
me, and then I went into an alley and was awful sick 
for more than half an hour. My friend came around 
and found me there and sympathized with me, and 
said that I would feel better if I would take another 
drink to settle my stomach.” 

“You believed him, of course,” I said sarcastically. 

“I had no reason to doubt his word ; thought I needed 
something. So we went the rounds and I kept on 
getting drunker and drunker until supper time, and 
then I began to think of what a fool I had made of 
myself, and concluded to come back to the hotel, al- 
though my friend wanted me to go home with him 
until I had sobered up, and I wish now that I had 
taken his advice.” 

“Benjamin Jones^ you are an old fool,” said I, 
hotly. 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


“No chance for an argument there,” said he. 

“I haven’t a bit of sympathy for you and only wish 
that that woman had half killed you,” I said with con- 
siderable bitterness. 

“I think she did,” he retorted. 

“Now, Benjamin, if this story ever gets out at 
Greenfield, you would be turned out of the church, 
and become the talk of the town, and lose the respect 
which 3^ou have enjoyed so long. I wouldn’t have it 
happen for anything,” said I. 

“Then don’t say anything about it; I never will,” 
said he. 

I told Benjamin that I had heard all I cared to of 
his disgraceful actions for once, and to shut his mouth 
and crawl into bed, as I had already lost more sleep 
than was good for me on his account. He was not 
slow in following my directions, and I, too, was soon 
in bed and asleep, onl}^ to dream about lectures, 
drunken men and disgraceful brawls. 


CHAPTER XIX. 


THE NEW WOMAN IN THE PULPIT. 

I EXPERIENCED Considerable difficulty in arousing 
Benjamin the next morning, but at last I succeeded in 
getting him out of bed by dousing him with cold 
water, an experiment which did not tend to increase 
his good-nature. I busied myself in giving him a lec- 
ture on the sin of intemperance while he was dressing 
himself. 

It was in no amiable frame of mind that he de- 
scended to breakfast, as he had now to recover from 
the effects of his debauch of the preceding day. He 
said his head ached, and that he was sore all over, 
and I could hot wonder at it when I thought of the 
treatment which he had received at the hands of the 
female street fakir. 

To my surprise, I found myself seated opposite the 
lady orator to whom I had listened and replied the 
evening before. She stared coldly at me when I 
bowed, and said she believed she had met me. before. 
She looked Benjamin over and smiled in spite of her- 
self, for really he did present a striking appearance, 
with his battered and swollen visage and general air 
of dejection. 

The lady asked him if he had been in a steamboat 
wreck, or had run up against a western cyclone. Ben- 
jamin said he guessed it must have been a cyclone in 

249 


250 BEl'SEV JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

the shape of a new woman, and he thought he would 
prefer the steamboat explosion for pure comfort and 
health. The lady smiled again, but said no more, for 
which I was truly thankful, as I did not want Benja- 
min to tell all he knew, although I did not imagine 
that it would take him very long to do it. 

After settling our bill we prepared to leave for Bos- 
ton, where we intended to stop over Sunday. The 
city was only about fourteen miles distant, and we 
would have only to follow the seashore road and ride 
along leisurely to get there in good time for dinner. 

We had not gone more than five miles when I heard 
a bicycle gong behind me, and on looking over my 
shoulder discovered two smart appearing young men 
wheeling along with considerable speed. As they 
rode up, one of them said: “Good morning. Are 
you going far?” 

I told him that we were going to Boston, and he 
had the impudence to tell me that if I intended to get 
there that day I would have to move a little faster 
than I was then doing. It riled me a little, and I told 
him that I could move just as fast as he could and 
perhaps a little faster, if I wished to. 

The fellow laughed and seemed to think it a good 
joke, as he called his companion’s attention to my re- 
mark, and said: “Well, madam, you must think your- 
self a scorcher?” 

I informed him that I could ride a wheel as fast as 
the next one when I wanted to, and that it was none 
of his business whether I could or not. He said if I 
could, my appearance deceived me. 


TIIK NEW WOxMAN IN THE PULPIT 


251 



we passed over the home mark I was leading by fully a hundred yards. 
Page 254. 



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THE NEW WOMAN IN THE PUI'M’IT 253 

I can’t stand it to have an3'body make fun of my 
shape, and this was an insult which I could not pass 
over lightly ; therefore I asked him if he had any 
money to bet that I couldn’t beat him, and he said 
that he had a little, and wanted to know if I really 
wanted to throw away my money to find out that I 
couldn’t beat him. I told him that I did, although I 
was not in the habit of betting with any one, but that 
I could not stand his impudence, and would wager 
him ten dollars that I could beat him in a mile dash, 
more or less, as he liked, and he accepted my chal- 
lenge. 

As the road ahead of us for some distance happened 
to be quite level and smooth, I proposed to the young 
man that my Benjamin and his companion ride on 
ahead about a mile and dismount, and make a mark 
across the road, to which we should ride and finish. 
He agreed to the plan and I gave Benjamin my valise, 
thus giving me something like an even chance with 
my opponent, who seemed to think it an awfully funny 
farce. Benjamin and the young man rode on ahead as 
arranged, and we waited about ten minutes to give 
them plenty of time to make their mark, when we 
mounted our ‘wheels and started. We got an even 
start and rode along together for a few rods, but I 
had made up my mind to give that fellow a beating 
that would take a little of the conceit out of him. I 
was in good condition, for my daily rides had done 
much to harden my muscles aqd improve my endur- 
ance. I began to put on the speed from the start and 
soon had the satisfaction of seeing my opponent drop 


254 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

behind me ; I bent down over my wheel and exercised 
my propellers at about eight-tenths of their full ca- 
pacity, and the gap between us widened as we drew 
nearer the scratch, and when we passed over the home 
mark I was leading by fully a hundred yards. 

The smart young man soon rode up looking sur- 
prised and chagrined. I suppose the money is mine,” 

I said. 

“Yes, it is yours. You won it fairly, but I should 
like to know whb you are,” he replied. 

“My name is Betsey Jane Jones, at j^our service, 
sir,” I replied. 

He handed me a ten-dollar bill, saying: have 

heard of you before, Mrs. Jones, and it is no wonder 
I was beaten. I am glad to have met you, however, 
even under such disadvantageous circumstances.” 

The young man said his name was Dixon, and that 
he and his friend we? e also going to Boston and they 
would be pleased to accompany us, providing I would 
ride moderately. I promised not to leave him and 
offered to give him back his money, saying that I did 
not care to keep it, for I didn’t believe in making money 
in that way. But he would not take it, said I could 
give it to the emancipators or the church. I told him 
that I was not in sympath}^ with the first named, which 
seemed to please him very much. 

We continued our journey until we reached the city, 
where the young men were obliged to leave us. We 
rode on down to the best hotel in the city, the one that 
the young men said was the best, and regikered, and 
took a room for over Sunday. 


THE NEW WOMAN IN THE PULPIT 


25s 



The best shave he ever got in all his Ufe. Page 257. 



yr 




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* 


THE NEW WOMAN IN THE PULPIT 


257 


After dinner Benjamin went out to get shaved and 
was gone nearly an hour. lie came back with a 
pretty smooth face and his looks very much improved.. 
Said he had been shaved by a lady barber, that she 
was a dandy too, the best shave he ever got in all his 
life. He vowed that if the new woman was especially 
fitted for any of the callings which had heretofore 
been occupied by man, it was the barber shop. Said 
the one who shaved him had such a soft, smooth hand, 
and when she patted his cheeks and pinched his chin 
he thought what a small show a man would stand 
alongside of such a tender and clever artist. 

I told him that the new woman barber might be a 
good shaver, but she was mighty slow, as he had been 
out fully an hour. He said the time seemed verv 
short to him, in fact he could have lain there in that 
chair all the afternoon without getting tired. 

We spent our afternoon riding about the cit}’ in a 
carriage, which is the best way for a stranger to see 
the city, as the drivers all know eveiy object of in- 
terest and drive you right to the spot. We visited, 
among many other places of interest, Faneuil Hall — 
the cradle of liberty, although I couldn’t see as it had 
rocked very much — the Old State House, Old South 
Church, the Boston Public Library, with its half mil- 
licm volumes, and the famous Massachusetts Institute 
of Technology. The parks of Boston are not more 
extensive than those of many other large cities, but I 
doubt if there are any in this country that surpass 
them in beauty; the boulevards are ample and affr)rd 


258 BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAK 

one a pleasant and cheerful drive, which I enjoyed 
very much. 

I kept Benjamin close by me that afternoon, and in 
the evening took him to the theater with me. We 
saw the new woman cropping out on every hand here, 
but she had not succeeded in completely capturing the 
cil}’ — perhaps because it was too large for her — as 
she had in other places already mentioned. 

The next morning we prepared to attend church, or 
rather I did ; Benjamin said that he did not care to go 
and I did not urge him, but made him promise that 
he would not leave the room during my absence. I 
inquired where I would find the Baptist Church, and. 
wended my way to the house of worship, a large stone 
structure with a high spire and big bell in it. 

1 was ushered into a seat well up in front, and as 1 
was early, I had ample time to watch the people and 
study their hats and styles of dress, an occasion which 
afforded me considerable amusement, although I tried 
not to make it evident. 

At last the choir came in and took their places, and 
I could not help noticing that they were all ladies, and 
even the pipe organ performer was a woman, and a 
very good musician too, but I took more notice of her 
antics as she jumped and slid from one end of llu‘ 
organ bench to the other in her efforts to strike her 
dainty little feet on a dozen or more pedals that were 
located in, it seemed to me, the most inconvenient 
positions possible, than I did of her music. I was not 
surprised to see a lady enter the pulpit, and when the 
hour for opening the seryices had arriyed, to see her 


the new woman in the pulpit 259 



afternoon riding about the city in a carriage. Page 257- 






TiiH \n\v woman in Tirii ruLi’iT 


261 


rise, wipe her spectacles in regular orthodox fashion, 
and announce the hymns. The singing was very good, 
although I could not help thinking that it could have 
been vastly improved by the addition of a few male 
voices. 

The collection was taken, to which I contributed mv 
share, and the pastor proceeded with the regular ser- 
vices, which did not differ materially from those I had 
always seen conducted by gentlemen. The lady de- 
livered a very good sermon, and I thought if there 
was any profession which woman could fill as well as 
man, it must be the ministry; and in revival meetings 
they should be more than a success amongst the men, 
especially if they were good looking and followed the 
same tactics of putting their arms around people that 
some of their male brethren have adopted, for it is my 
humble opinion that few men would be able to resist 
such entreaties, especially for any great length of 
time. 

I returned to the hotel immediately after the ser- 
vices, and to my surprise, relief and joy, found 
Ijenjamin fast asleep, and thought that for once, at 
least, he had been out of mischief when out of my 
sight. 


CHAPTER XX. 


OUR SAFE RETREAT. 

Benjamin was thoroughly disgusted and told me 
that he was going home, and that I could go to Hali- 
fax or anj’where else that I pleased ; as for him, he 
had seen all of the new woman that he ever wanted 
to. I tried to argue with him, and prevail upon him 
to continue the trip, but he was obdurate, and for 
once I could do nothing with him. as he said that he 
was going home before he 'vas killed outright. Said 
he had already suffered enough on my account ; he 
was not willing to make a martyr of himself, to lay 
his life on the altar in behalf of the new woman. 

Seeing that argument had no effect, I at last con- 
sented to return home, feeling that I had already 
gathered sufficient material with which to construct a 
book, and accordingly packed up and told Benjamin 
that I was ready to start whenever he was. 

I was surprised when he told me that we were go- 
ing on the cars, as the scorching July sun (we were 
just entering upon the first days of July) was not con- 
genial to his bodily or mental comfort. He said that 
wheeling over dry, dusty roads with the thermometer 
above loo was not inspiring, and in this I agreed with 
him. 

I went out and bought tickets to Greenfield that 
evening, got our bicycles checked, and we got up 

262 


OUR SAFE RETREAT 


263 


and look an early train for home the next morning. 
The ride was rather an uneventful one ; we were 
whirled along at a rapid rate and it did not seem near 
as far as it did when we came out on our wheels. 
When the train thundered into our old home town, 
Benjamin was all excitement, and could hardly con- 
tain himself. Before the train had fairly stopped, he 
had rushed out of the car and jumped to the platform, 
without giving me the slightest assistance. 

When I reached the platform, I found Benjamin in 
possession of fhe cycles and ready to leave. Several 
friends and acquaintances had gathered around him, 
but as soon as he saw me he told me to come on, 
that he was in a hurry to reach home. In less than 
five minutes we were riding rapidly down the road 
towards our home, and I was made to fully realize 
that ‘‘no matter how humble, there’s no place like 
home.” 

We rolled into our yard just two weeks after we 
had rolled out, and I doubt if any man and woman, 
‘boy and girl, or any other pair of human beings of 
whatever combination or sex, ever had more genuine 
exhilarating experience in two weeks’ time. 

Benjamin seemed to be tickled nearly to death to 
get back home ; he acted like a four-year-old boy with 
a new drum. As we dismounted, Walter appeared 
at the kitchen door carrying a dishpan of water which 
he was about to empty. He was clad in one of my 
old aprons, which reached to his ankles; his sleeves 
were rolled up, and he looked more like some hired 
girl than my dudish son. He was so surprised that 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NiiW W OMAN 




■04 


he came near dropping the dishpan. but linally recov- 
ered himself long enough to ejaculate: “Wherein 
the name of heaven did you come from?’’ They did 
not expect us home for another fortnight. 

Benjamin had been staring at Walter ever since his 
appearance, and said: “Wdiere did you get that 
Mother Hubbard rig? and wdiat have you been trying 
to do, anyhow?’’ 

Walter said that he had been wNishing the dinner 
dishes, as Alice had gone to take part in a female base 
ball game at a neighboring town. “Walter.” said 
Benjamin sternly, “I w^ant you to take that blamed 
old apron off, and never ! never ! as long as you re- 
main at home, let me again see you in such a rig as 
that. Take it off and leave that kind of w’ork to 
Alice.” 

“ Alice won’t do this kind of work now^” replied 
Walter, “and I have to do it, if it. is done at all.” 

“Til see about that wd:ien Alice gets home,” re- 
marked Benjamin. 

We entered the house and hmnd things very much 
as w^e had left them. A couple of hours later, Alice rode 
into the yard on her w'heel, attired in a very pretty 
base ball suit, wdiich Benjamin said did not leave very 
much to the imagination. She w^as glad to see us and 
asked lots of questions. 

Benjamin allowed her to rattle on for some time, 
then he began to relieve his mind of the great weight 
wdiich appeared to be resting upon it. He commenced 
something like this : 

“Alice, haven’t I ahvays been a kind and indulgent 


OUR SAUK J<.ETREAT 265 



Page 267. 


kL!.> 





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267 


SAFE RLrj’REAT 

father?” She replied in the allirniative. and he went 
on: '■‘I have always let you do just about as you 
liked, and have never found any fault with you or 
what you did, but now I am going to do both, and I 
want you to understand that I mean just what I say, 
and shall say just what I mean. I have seen the new 
woman in all her varied phases of reformation and 
emancipation, and know by bitter experience ljuit she 
is a sad failure. She is successful in making herself 
generally disagreeable, and in converting earth into a 
perfect hades; she is a lirst-class nuisance, which 
should be exterminated, and I don't intend to have 
any more darn nonsense in my house. I want you to 
rid yourself of the false idea that you were born to 
command, and be the nice, pretty, sensible girl that 
vou were before this nonsense about the new woman 
entered your foolish brain.” 

Alice braced up, and said that she had a mission to 
perform, that woman was not intended to be man’s 
slave ; that she was in every way his equal and in 
many his superior. She did not intend to be frowned 
down, when she had made up her mind that she was 
in the right. 

Benjamin was considerably riled up over Alice’s 
remarks, and renewed hostilities by saying : '4 don’t 
want to hear another word of that nonsense about 
missions to perform; you will find that your first mis- 
sion is to obey me, and the second to behave yourself 
like a respectable woman, instead of togging yourself 
up in a rig like that, and making yourself both ridic- 
ulous and disreputable. You will either mind me or 


268 


nj<7rSKV JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 

r 

go where I haven’t any authority over you. A.s long 
as you remain beneath my roof you will do what 1 
say ; after you leave it, you can do as you darn' please. 
I’ll make you mind if I have to shake you into liddle- 
strings, and I am going to commence right here and 
now. You go to your room and change that circus 
outlit for something a little more respectable.” 

Alic^ began to cry, while Walter seemed much 
amused, and saijd : “Don’t be too hard on her, father; 
let her down easy.” 

Benjamin turned on his son and heir in a savage 
manner, saying: “I want nothing out of you but 
silence, and darn little of that. When I want any of 
your advice, J’oung man, I’ll call on you. I have seen 
so much of this new woman business, that I know that 
unless a man makes the most decided kind of a stand, he 
isn’t in it, and becomes a mere cipher in his own 
household, and I am no cipher, and don’t intend to be 
one either.” 

Walter smiled, but said no more, being fully con- 
vinced that his father was in earnest, and meant busi- 
ness from the word go. 

Alice continued to cry and sob as if her heart would 
break, and I was beginning to sympathize with her, 
when Benjamin again remarked : “It’s no use, Alice ; 
you might as well come to a full realization of the 
truth, lirst as last, and although it may seem a triiie 
hard now, you will live to thank me for saving you 
from becoming one of those horrid new women, I 
love you as much or more than any other human be- 
ing, and am willing and anxious to do all in my power 


OUR SAFE RETREAT 


269 


to promote 3 ’our happiness and well-being, and I am 
certain that I cannot do that without putting a stop to 
this craze which seems to have struck you with telling 
effect. You are a success in your proper role, but a 
miserable failure in the one you are now attempting. 
1 will not have it, and you may as well make up your 
mind to that fact, and I know that your mother will 
sustain me in my course; for she, as a woman, has no 
earthly use for the new woman, and like myself, is 
thoroughly disgusted with her, just as any true- 
hearted, right-minded woman would be.” 

Alice left the room and we saw no more of her until 
supper time, when she came down clad in the habili- 
ments which naturally belong to her sex. I could see 
that she had been weeping, but she looked quite 
cheerful, and wdien her father cam.e in and sat down, 
went up to him, and placing her arms about his neck 
seated herself in his lap, and said: “Father, Fam 
going to do as you wish me to, for I am convinced 
that you are right. The new woman role is not cal- 
culated for one of my disposition, and to tell you the 
truth, 1 have long been sick of it, but after I had once 
taken it up 1 was too proud to renounce it.” 

I told Benjamin that 1 was indeed proud of him in 
the noble stand he had taken on the new woman busi- 
ness, that he- had surprised me by his forcible argu- 
ments and I hoped he would never again make the mis- 
take of encouraging his children in following after 
such a delusion as the new woman certainly was, but 
1 felt that 1 ought to give the children a little lecture 
on the new w'oman while they were in the mood to 


270 


BETSEY JANE ON THE NEW WOMAN 


receive it gracefully, and I proceeded about as follows : 

^‘From my observations and experiences, I have 
learned that the new woman is a strange creature, 
possessed of strange notions ; she is a revolting speci- 
men of humanity, with unusual notions about the home, 
wifehood and motherhood; she speaks of children as 
brats, they tire her and so she bestows what little 
affection she has upon some ugly little pug-nose dog 
which she drags around by a string. She devotes all 
her time and energies to the emancipation of her sex 
and the world-wdde rule of w^oman. She hates, scorns, 
abhors and endeavors to down the men, and conse- 
quently she is scorned and shunned by the men, who 
can see nothing in her to love or even respect. What 
these new women need is a self-asserting husband who 
wdll sit down on them and crush their wdld ideas.' She 
should be taught that her mission is something higher 
and more noble than voting and holding office, and 
doing that which God never intended she should do ; 
she should be made to realize that there is somethin o- 
to fear, if not to honor, in the other sex.” 

Walter and Alice both broke in and said that they 
were satisfied, and I had better save my arguments for 
Mdlle. Francena, as she would be wuth us in a week, 
at the same time producing a letter wffiich they had 
received from her the day before. She apologized 
for not returning earlier, but promised to make us a 
long visit. 

Write her that we are all dead and don’t want to 
see her,” shouted Benjamin, “We huve had all the 


'OUR SAFE RETREAT 


271 

experience with wo’bemen that we want, and her 
room is better than her company/’ 

I was only too glad to write Mdlle. PVancena as 
Benjamin directed, and since our return from that 
memorable trip, Benjamin has not been the same man, 
and everything has passed smoothly in our family 
circle. Walter has resumed his law study, and Alice 
is devoting her time to learning to cook, sew and do 
house work, as her mother does, and is convinced that 
the new woman will never succeed in the complete 
subjection of man. 

We left the supper table and Benjamin went out of 
the house towards the barn ; as he was going, he 
noticed an old hen flopping her wings and trying to 
come to a balance on the top rail of the yard fence, 
and seizing a stick of stove wood he hurled it at her 
with the remark: “Now you try to rooster, will you? 
Darn your picture, I’ll show you that I am running this 
whole place, and I’ll kill every gol blame new lien 
that tries to rooster on it. Take that, will you?” and 
he let the stick fly, which struck the poor innocent 
thing and knocked her to the ground. 





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JOHN P ALTGELE 

President John Smith : 
exceedingly interesting an 
full of suggestive facts a 
to practical reform 

Ignatius Donnell' 

President John Smith i 
a skilled and thoughtful ex; 
posure of the present falsi 
social fabric 

Thos E. Watson 

A demand for the initiative 
and referendum; for nationa, 
ownership of monopolies; for a re’ 
vision of the United States Constitution 
and for the reign of common sense. 29( 
pages, handsomely illustrated 


the: signal fPAOf 23) 


PRESlDEHTJOHNSHint 


A BRILLIANT STORY BASED ON SCIENTlflC 

Ss. SOCIAL! SA- 


BY TRLDERICR U. ADAMS. 


MAILED TO ANY ADDRESS ON RECEIPT OF PRICE. 

TJ D 1 8^*4^ IVIXS WAISITED. 


^ CHARLES M..KERR& COMPANY Publishers, i 
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